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Social Drinking ??

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by nolife, Jun 6, 2019.

  1. nolife

    nolife Silver IL'ite

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    what does social drinking mean with respect to your husbands? Does your husbands friends come to your house and drink with him?
     
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  2. sbonigala

    sbonigala Finest Post Winner

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    yes they do and they all drink in limits and laugh and watch a sport together or discuss politics.
    Never has anyone behaved or acted dirty.
    Everyone is a responsible dad and they all are very very decent, family-oriented guys
     
  3. Anusha2917

    Anusha2917 Finest Post Winner

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    Occasional drinks with friends/cousins . May be 2-3 times a year. Till now he had party at our house once or twice with cousins.
     
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  4. senorita2019

    senorita2019 Gold IL'ite

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    Social drinking is mainly when you are at a party or with company you drink as a courtesy ..
    But today men create meetups just to get drunk and enjoy, this is not social drinking. this is just drinking and a bad habit
     
  5. Agathinai

    Agathinai Silver IL'ite

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    It all comes down to personal likes as well. For me nope, I don’t have any such social gatherings at home. I don’t like the smell of alcohol let alone the hazards of drinking. No drinking was easier and luckily husband doesn’t drink.

    Regarding social drinking, I read your another post and so replying here itself. It comes down to whether you are happy to have social situations at home post marriage which involves consuming alcohol. Moreover, make sure that you are aware of how much one drinks in social gatherings. For some binge drinking on 1 or 2 days a week is fine and will tell as normal but that’s actually more standard drinks than allowed. If you are considering the above context with regards to finding a suitable partner be thorough in asking about the drinking habits.

    Ask what social gatherings he drinks, how often does that social gatherings occur in a week or month and how much of what types of drinks he is drinking. Moreover are you comfortable to have such gatherings at your home. Ask these and decide.
    Good luck.
     
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  6. Amulet

    Amulet Platinum IL'ite

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    Social Drinking -- is more about drinking with colleagues, business-customers, and/or friends outside the home.
    Not just for the husband -- for both, if both are employed well, and such off-work-site get togethers are not unusual in the west. When we go out to eat, it is unusual for us not to have a drink. That happens when one of us is suffering a cold (sniffles) or a sore throat that feels like it might transition to a cold.

    When people, usually relatives, come to parties at home (in the west), there will be some drinking. I can also make the well-known garden variety cocktails. In one party I had gone to, they had stickers for people who are "designated drivers". These stickers are sold in party-supply stores.
    upload_2019-6-7_5-19-13.png
    In India, the custom of the relatives is quite different. Having a bottle of alcohol in the house is considered taboo. The gifts of alcohol (that are requested and brought) from duty free shops are secretly passed on, and hidden away somewhere unknown. I have no idea how/when they manage drink that. Certainly not social drinking.

    If someone says "s/he is a social drinker", and you ask "how much/frequently" kinds of questions, and s/he goes on the defensive, would always understate the drinking habit.

    [:facepalm::frown: I had this sudden recall of @pocahontas post on the reviews of this website -- especially about how some of us are encouraging good people to take to drinking. ]
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2019
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  7. Amulet

    Amulet Platinum IL'ite

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    @nolife:
    The "drinking habit is good or bad ??" thread has some very interesting/useful input comments.
    Like this one:
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2019
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  8. ramya8085

    ramya8085 Bronze IL'ite

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    now a days women drink. not american born desi, all 100 percent indian onsite , married or un married. my work place has happy hours, women consume wine almost as close as men.

    i went to my cousin thanks giving dinner , everyone was drinking ( except elder women ) . my cousins and their dhs.
    tamil brahmins ( just to add masala about being conservatives :) . .

    i feel singling out men in 2019 for this, irrelevant . things have changed a lot , you will notice the same, if you work .

    taking input from this forum is ok but that should not be the final say. If you do not like your spouse to bring his friends and drink at home , it should be communicated well before.
     
  9. sbonigala

    sbonigala Finest Post Winner

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    I was about to write something similar.
    After a really tiring day , after meeting after meeting after meeting when I am exhausted - I enjoy a glass of wine.
    It is not social drinking per se. I drink in my own home, with my H.
    It is one of the ways I unwind at the end of a tough week.
    These days not every friend lives close to home or in the same city.
    My H's friends are in different state working for different clients. They visit our city on work. These guys get together after work in a pub, grab a few beers, have dinner and take public transport to come home or just a cab.
    I don't see anything wrong in my H and his friends doing that.
    I feel we all need a break and a friends circle out side family and work.
    As long as it is not a daily habit or a weekly routine - its okay, according to me. Such meets happen once in 2-3 months.
    I think as long as we know our limits and we act sensible, its okay to drink in a social set up (after work drinks) or even getting together with friends to grab a beer or 2 or just sit at home with a glass of wine.

    Every family operates differently. I am not saying it should be okay for everyone. I am just saying its okay for me !
     
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  10. nolife

    nolife Silver IL'ite

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    yes it's not about equality of both men and women drinking..it is about tolerance levels.. i hav let go of this match on other reasons too.. most women drink and i feel it is best for him to choose a women with similar traits..
     

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