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Working just to avoid being home with in-laws

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Rihana, Nov 4, 2012.

  1. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    :) It is pouring threads about men/women working or not... here's one I've often wondered about:

    A woman with young school-age kids, living in the U.S. with husband. She has never worked but has a graduate degree and is smart and outgoing. Husband decides to bring his parents over from India, get them green cards, and they will spend 8-10 months per year living with them.

    Woman decides to get a job, any job, just to get out of the house. Job's hours match kids' school hours (9 AM - 3 PM). She will make some money, but not much (say, about $12 per hour as preschool aide after doing a cheap basic 3 month course or check-out clerk).

    Husband says don't take the job, parents need company, will get bored, they can't drive...

    Is what she doing right? Taking on a low paying job to get out of the house just because in-laws will be living with them.
     
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  2. vidyamenon

    vidyamenon New IL'ite

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    after all its his parents coming together naa?
    the old couple can relax intheir own way,i guess!
    defenitely if the lady wants to go ut and work,there must be a genuine reason behind it...........
     
  3. sushmavja

    sushmavja Platinum IL'ite

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    depends on how the in-laws usually treat her..
     
  4. aniShekar

    aniShekar Platinum IL'ite

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    Wouldn't blame her, really.....I probably would've done the same! She just needs her own space, I guess....

    She's going to be back in the afternoons, so there'd be enough time for driving around/ giving company and such other jobs her husband's lined up for her!!

    Her in-laws would settle better if they have someone for their own age and outlook to bond with. Too often we see parents coming over for long and regular spells, and never quite settling down. IMO, they wouldn't feel out-of-place if they have their own friends and activities, and aren't too dependent on DIL/son (though quite a few sons are never around, are they - they seem to assume their job's done once the green card comes through!)
     
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  5. Endlesshope

    Endlesshope Platinum IL'ite

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    Yes absolutely for sanity.
    I would infact sign up to volunteer in a remote artic camp or may be travel to end of universe for research purposes :thumbsup
     
  6. riyagan

    riyagan Gold IL'ite

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    :exactly:i second Endlesshope
     
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  7. vidyamenon

    vidyamenon New IL'ite

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    omg ,artic will be crowded soon!
    dont give such ideas in forums!:)
     
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  8. soumyapr

    soumyapr Senior IL'ite

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    There is no question of right and wrong in this. If she thinks that she needs some time of her own, away from in-laws, she has a right to it. The attitude of the husband proves that as is she will be spending all her weekends with in-laws.

    Besides, no one in US cares whether someone is doing a low paying or a high paying job, as long as they are doing it right.

    I wish such a woman a lot of luck and hope she will grow in her job.
     
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  9. monita

    monita Platinum IL'ite

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    I was just reading your post on another tread and I am quoting you from there:
    "... I disagree because I place higher value on individual freedom and ability to do what is legally allowed."
    I believe taking a low paying job to get out of the house is legal.
     
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  10. sweetshreya

    sweetshreya IL Hall of Fame

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    Don't you think it will be for their good also? Having to see her at home, squandering their son's money, will be most unpleasant to these old people. And who needs her at home anyway? They are there to look after the kids. :)

    If husband is smart, he himself will help the wife to get a job, even if voluntary work. And at least 3 months before they are coming, to make it look more natural. in India, we at least have other work like gossiping with neighbors, gossiping about neighbor. Moreover, by scolding the maid, milkman, paperboy, etc, some of the heat is dissipated. If these two at war people are shut up in one house, day in-day-out, just imagine what will happen.... :drowning

    The wife escaping is for the greater good........ not only her own. :)
     
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