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Wife Caught Talking And Texting Many Men

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by ConfusedHusband, Jul 21, 2016.

  1. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    you have put it across much more precise and better Than I did.this is what I wanted to convey
     
    anehstar likes this.
  2. ConfusedHusband

    ConfusedHusband New IL'ite

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    All this happened because I trusted her too much. I loved her too much. She took me for granted.
    When first incident happened in my house where man touched here inappropriately.
    It took me by surprise. We argued a week. We went to restaurant and talked over for 2 hours. She assured me nothing is going on. I believed her.

    Then life went on as normal. After one month, I was looking for phone records for a number which I took phone interview for 3 hours. I discovered, accidentally her phone calls. Still I did not suspect her. I did not know who those numbers are, so I dialed one number which turned out one of her colleague. She was so pissed that she came home and her first sentence was she wants divorce. She gave me stupid list of reasons.

    Well, it put me in depression, shock. She took my right to ask any question by playing divorce card. All I did was cry. I didn't eat for weeks and she didn't give crap about it. She still kept on going to work.
    It took 2 months to get some courage to confront her.

    She was talking to 3 men regularly for last 2 years. Never mentioned a word about that. She talked about all her female co-workers but not about them. When I was not at home, she is talking to them. When I am around she is texting. She texted sitting right besides me, while I am driving or sitting across at restaurant. I never suspected her.
    It is sad that she spoke to guy on same day when she took oath in restaurant. She continued talking to him and flirting in texts till I discovered the phone records.

    I cannot believe how a married woman with full time job and full time family gets hours of talking time. What you talk for daily for hours? Unless there is emotional relationship!!!
    Why other married men will talk to her so long for so long period unless they have chance or hope to get insider her pants!!!
    Why a married woman ask for divorce one fine day!!!
     
  3. BlackMan

    BlackMan Silver IL'ite

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    If men are allowed to talk and flirt with women, what is the problem when women doing the same.If given a chance don't you flirt with some one ?
     
    amnilakshmi likes this.
  4. svjm

    svjm Guest


    With so much doubts and if you are pretty sure about your wife problems, please go ahead and leave her. If divorce would give peace of mind, then no harm to proceed rather than brooding over has happened. Would be beneficial for both of you.
     
    monkatpeace87 likes this.
  5. PhoenixAwoken

    PhoenixAwoken Bronze IL'ite

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    That is a huge generalisation. When a couple has problems, it's not solved by heaping women and men as two entities and weighing their collective crimes.
    Neither men nor women are supposed to flirt with ppl other than their spouses. It's not ok for either of them. Looks like Very few ppl understand emotional intimacy..
     
    monkatpeace87, anehstar and svjm like this.
  6. anehstar

    anehstar Silver IL'ite

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    Ok. Just few more things for you to weigh before you arrive at any decision. Please talk and figure out these: Does she realize her mistake and feels apologetic about it. Does she repent on doing all that? And she promises to not repeat it again. Is she ready to rekindle that love with you since your life for 2 years seems to be so downhill. Dos she trusts you now?
    From your end: ask yourself all these... Are you ready to forgive her and give her one more chance? you still trust her? Do you think it was immature on her part to do all that? You ll love her with all your heart like you used to do before ( This might take time,, but a probablility should be there) Will you be able to forget all what has happened and start afresh with her?
    Marriage is based on trust and mutual commitment. If its lacking from either side, it will end up in a mess.. You both need to understand that and move on.
    Please take your decision calmly. You both have suffered ..take time to think and decide well!! Don't regret anytime!
    Good Luck!!
     
    anika987 likes this.
  7. bruised234

    bruised234 Gold IL'ite

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    Sorry Ragini25, did not have anything personal against you, but don't you think the polygraph test is too much? This is definitely a troll. And typically men don't need IL to vent, they have their circle and support too. It is women who need anonymity because we can neither trust nor support each other except if it is our moms or sisters.
     
    anika987 likes this.
  8. GoogleGlass

    GoogleGlass IL Hall of Fame

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    Of all the polygraph was the most intetesting (presuming to be a troll). Not sure was it in trigo r something in maths at school used graph sheets :)

    Poly stands for poly then why they named it so to reveal the holy? Shouldn't it be called holygraph? :)
     
    SGBV likes this.
  9. monkatpeace87

    monkatpeace87 Silver IL'ite

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    U did a polygraph on ur wife?? U got to be kidding me man. In india I think polygraph is not allowed with the permission of the court. Where are u from???
     
  10. kollen

    kollen Bronze IL'ite

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    She does not appear to have the qualities of a married woman and seems like she is still playing in the jungle... chasing skirt if it had been a man. Haha.

    Put your foot down and let her that you will not accept that behaviour while you are married.

    The fact that she is emotionally blackmailing you with sayings like, "divorce will ruin you" is self-evident that this woman has issues to deal with. Emotional manipulation or blackmail are the bottom and a great indicator for discernment of the other person's character.

    Put your foot down and let her know you have spine and will not tolerate that behaviour as a married woman.

    If she feels she does not want that, then divorce her.

    An emotionally unstable person is bomb without a timer.

    Do your self a favor and reconsider this marriage.
     
    niriha likes this.

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