Why Do Women Keep Quiet on Being Attacked?

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A lady instructor of the gym I am a member of, has been raped not once but twice recently by two male instructors in the changing room of the gym. Horrible? Yes, more because the newspaper reports suggest that she was raped by the gym manager initially, after he had offered her a sedative in guise of a painkiller, and she had kept quiet about the incident fearing a loss of her job. She was a few days later raped again by another instructor, who had earlier heard from the gym manager that she is ‘easy’. Both the rapist are in jail now, but to top it all, all three, including the victim, have lost their jobs.

Do I know her and the gym instructors? No, but does it matter? Yes, it does. For me, it raises some really painful issues I have been fighting all my life, that of gender equality and women’s safety in India. The gym is in a government run sports complex in the beautiful residential area of Dwarka in Delhi, and the incident happened at 11am, when the gym administration claims around 40 members were using the gym! It’s my guess that all the members present must have reported seeing and hearing nothing on being interrogated by police about the incident.

To say the incident has shocked me, is only to put it mildly. I am stunned beyond disbelief that the place I visited thinking it to be a safe haven, is nothing of the sort; that women are nothing but mere bodies to men who can happily ogle them all the time, and rape is nothing but a matter of opportunity. I have regularly seen the gym manager on my visits to the gym, who seemed to me the most nondescript of a fellow, and to find him commit such a heinous act is something I am still grappling to come in terms with.
The single-most question that has plagued me since the incident, more than all mine and my family’s concerns about the safety factor, is why on earth the girl, a 24-year old, kept quiet in the first place. Why did she believe that a rape is her problem and she must hide with her shame? Or is it because she believed her income is more important to her family than her assault and her well being? Why women must be forced to think that such things are her fault alone? Why safety of women are still not big enough of issues to raise a hue and cry on it, or allocate a government budget on it, when another newspaper report suggests that ‘A woman is raped every 18 hrs in Delhi’?

A rape is a serious crime, and assault to a person and must be reported, irrespective of the fact that it may mean a few days of so-called ‘notoriety’ (as the society will happily point out). A crime must be reported to allow the authorities to catch the culprits and take action. By shutting inside a veil of silence, we are allowing the crooks to get away with it, destroy evidences, and boast about their actions, creating a myth that such acts are heroic and can be replicated. Women are not responsible for rapes, for rapes have happened to women wearing burqas, and being kept prisoners inside a familial wall. Please report every single assault on your bodies, and don’t be afraid. It’s our right to protest against people who trespass our boundaries, and no, we didn’t ask for it. Physical assaults can break our bodies, but don’t let that break your spirit.

 

Hi sreemanavaneeth,

I have always found that writing about easy topics have a feel-good factor, and draws more readers. But sometimes we owe it to the soceity to bring to light crimes and atrocities, and encourage people to speak up, even if such stories do not generate much eyeballs. Silence is sometimes not golden at all.

As always, its really motivating to read your comments.

Regards.

 

Hi Zipzipzoomzoom,

Sometimes the injustice of these incidents become too strong not to stay indifferent. I would have not felt it so disturbing had it not happened so close to our world. Its now I can feel the danger, and its now we must act. And it should all start from non-aceptance of set rules made by society for women, isn't it?
Thanks for stopping by.

 

Hi Coffeelover,

How should we react to sad topics? Or about subjects that needs to be heard again and again, even if people have lost being sensitive towards the issue because it happens everyday? Should we let it by as just another event or should we react? I react by writing. For me, this is my way of protest and I believe pen is mightier than sword.

I will always write, but its when readers like comment, I'd like to believe that our voices had just got stronger. :thumbsup