Why do few couples living abroad have their kids taken care by parents or ILs?

mithy, wat i meant is a 15k income.... maybe we are talking to the lowest working class in the hierarchy,no?
like for eg, my maid i pay 5k and her husband a driver earns 10... i dont think we are even talking about middle class here...

 

the class band is different for cities, tier-2 cities, towns and villages.
a 15K income may be considered lower class in a city, considered middle income in tier-2 cities, good and rich in town and villages respectively.
i had a stay at home maid whom i paid 4K. after 2 months, she told that she needs only Rs.500 to live a normal life in her home town as she gets everything at subsidised rate in tamilnadu ration shops. She went there for good and never came back to the cities.
The class band is much related to the expense too.
If you have a own house in a tier-2 city and an income of 15k, you can live a very decent life much better than the city life. Here we end up paying that amount for rent alone.

 

Well I am a child brought up by my both sets grand parents. And seriously I am very happy that my parents left me with them .My happiest memories of my life are there.Also 3 of my grandparents died by the time I turned 7 . If I hadn't been living with them , I would not have the sweet memories and my grand parents would have meant nothing to me other than the photoes in the altar.Grandparents brought our parents up...so they can also take care of the grandkids well.And the ideal time to have kids for women is 19- 32. .Since we women have career now, grand parents ,if they are willing ,are the best.I know 1 boy who is totally brought up by his grandparents .He is such a good boy.I think if kids are brought by grandparents they are not neglected .Just my 2 cents.

 

Yes, they have already done their responsibility. Is the responsibility of the parents to give birth, and then ask the grandparents to do second parenting again? [exceptions for special extenuating circumstances apart]

 

I didn't know 15K income group joined Lower class group.

Taking a step down in status for the sake of kid is not a bad idea. JMO.

 

kiranmadhu, i thought here we were talking about cities alone.... we werent talking about wat maids need to stay a decent life in their villages.....
i am sure ,here, we were not talking about Indians who have moved abroad from remote villages, but we were talking about Indians, well educated, with prospective job opportunities, moving abroad...
I cant imagine an Indian who has moved abroad, earning Rs 500 back home... lol

mithy, times have changed, and so have incomes.

 

the thread just moved OT, sorry, my bad

 

Don't ever send your child to India to be raised by your parents. I am 34 years old and was sent to India to live with my grandparents between the ages of 6 mos and 12 mos. I knew my grandparents because they had been in Canada. Still, I feel like I was not good enough and that is why I was sent away. Even though my mom had to work, she could have found some way to keep me there. It does not matter that she cried when I was there. I cried, missing her, too. I have an 8 month old daughter and 2 older ones now. I cannot imagine being away from her for a day let alone 6 mos! I am an insecure person now, no matter how beautiful or wonderful people tell me I am. I do not have a very tight relationship with my mom. My other two siblings were not sent to India. Why me? I love my grandparents, they are wonderful. But they are not my parents, and that feeling of longing and abandonment I have will always be there. I am currently seeing a psychologist and working through it.

 

There are lots of adjustments required to continue job and being a mom. The reasons are different for different people. Sometimes, the financial dependence of the mother on the father (when quitting a career) is a big risk mothers take. When there are marital problems, a woman will not want to quit her job just to be sure of her future and also her kid's. So, we cannot just generalise that women who send their kids off are either lazy/irresponsible. The ideal situation would be to have a parent look after the kid. Then only the mother has to adjust. But, if she is not ready/cant leave her job then everybody has to adjust including baby and grandparents.

 

This topic has both sides.
I believe that when parents decide to go for baby, they should also make themseleves ready to take care of their baby. Its not like this that you give a birth to baby and just handover to someone.
Very rightly said by Curiosgal " its wondeful feeling to watch your kids grow..." These are some special moments in parents life.

Yes, i can understand there can be situations where both parents has to work, financial needs??
But you can still find some ways and be with your baby.