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Why are some people naturally happier?

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by sheetal, Feb 5, 2007.

  1. sheetal

    sheetal New IL'ite

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    As I observe more people in various walks of life, some people seem to be naturally happier. Have you all noticed that? I introspected; I am happy when things happen the way I like it and I am unhappy when the opposite happens. Are these seemingly happy people blessed with just happy circumstances - I wondered?

    But looks like some people are made happier than others. These people come into this world with an "emotional set point". People seem to be born as an optimist or a pessimist. If that being the case, I am unclear where I fall in the pessimist<->optimist spectrum.

    Has anyone wondered about this?

    Sheetal
     
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  2. Eljaype

    Eljaype Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear Sheetal,

    I can say that I belong to the category of seemingly happier people than others.
    Neither are we born happy nor are we born with a preset emotional points. What I can say for myself is that I don't like to show my tensions and sadness to all. It is always said everybody will be there when you are happy and you'll be alone when you are sad. I hide behind that smile and laughter.
    Only to those who are very close to me I show what goes on in my mind. Why should I burden others with my sorrows when I can make everyone happy with my smile?
    Latha
     
  3. bitika

    bitika New IL'ite

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    Dear Latha,

    You have written what is in my mind........ I always have a smile in my face and many have asked how i look so happy.....and i reply with "Why should I burden others with my sorrows when I can make everyone happy with my smile?"

    :wave bitika
     
  4. vidyasarada

    vidyasarada Senior IL'ite

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    Dear Sheetal
    Reading your post, I remembered a programme in"The Travel & Living"Channel which had an episode on India. At the very end of the episode, the traveller, a western lady, declares that the charm of India does not lie only in its breathtaking geography and culture, but chiefly in the ability of its people to keep smiling and sharing happiness, inspite of poverty , bad living conditions and lack of civic eminities.
    In the western context, happiness is only a byproduct linked to a tangible pivot. A person says he is happy "because" he has a good job, good health, a good family etc. Frequently they also say, " I will be happy IF I have - whatever-" thereby laying a condition for happiness.
    But in our culture, we are taught that happiness is the inner core of every living being , that can be realised by anyone, anytime. Still, most of us are not generally "happy " in the course of everyday living ! I think thats because we have educated ourselves wrong. Instead of just feeling, we question ourselves, Am I Happy ? and seek a valid reason for it. Of course we always end up finding more reasons for being officially "Unhappy" than "Happy" ! As I see it, Pessimists are people who keep questioning like this . "People born happy" have a knack of just accepting what IS.
    We just have to learn to LET GO !

    Sri Sri Ravishankar has written a lot about this thing called Happiness.

    Happy to have read your post Sheetal :tongue

    VS
     
  5. vivbass

    vivbass Gold IL'ite

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    hi Eljaype thanx for ur post ,really useful thought.
    also thanx to sheetal for ur nice thread.
     
  6. sathya

    sathya Gold IL'ite

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    hello

    sirikkum mugangalukku pinnal
    sogam irukkakkoodum

    nirka
    arattuginra manathu
    adangugirathu
    acceptancil

    idhu vendum
    adhu vendum
    illaamal
    edu irukko
    adhu podum
    enru ninaikka katrukkondal
    inda ulagalavu happiness
    koodave varum...

    sathya
     
  7. honeybee

    honeybee Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Sheetal
    You have raised a very valid question indeed.
    I read in a magazine that People who always have a smiling face are not free from troubles or problems.. but they are strongwilled /determined & have the capacity to overcome any demanding situation easily.

    :cool2:

    Regards
    Honeybee
     
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  8. Eljaype

    Eljaype Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear Ladies,

    Thanks . When you start smiling it is very easy to overcome anything. You will not have your tension piled up. No BP also.
    People will be more friendly towards you. In the shops also , if they know you, they will not forget you that easily. This has been my experiance.

    You need not laugh outright or smile at everyone. Just that smiling eyes will be enough. All the best dears
    Latha :wave
     
  9. chaand2013

    chaand2013 New IL'ite

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    dear sheetal
    people who seem to be happy are not really happy.but god has given them that beautiful smile to hide their sorrows.but my problem is my face always show i m sad,with lots of tension.thats why people fear to be friendly with me.even i have lots of problems in my life,even i want to hide from others but r shown from my facial expression.
    i really want a good smiling face.
    anybody plz suggest how to get a smiling face
    waiting for replies
    chaand
     
  10. Nila

    Nila New IL'ite

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    Hi Ladies,

    The title of this thread caught my attention so much to make this post. Sheetal according to me this is a million dollar question. If the answer to this is known, even people who are not naturally happier would learn to be one.

    I'm sorry if I'm changing the subject of this thread by sharing what I go through now. I was a normally cheerful person, though not with a smile on my face or eyes forever. I never use to look sad. But recently after having a baby, I had to go through so much both physically and mentally that I feel I lost the cheerfulness. My husband too keeps worrying about it and tries to do all that is possible to keep me cheerful.

    I am happy about having the baby, I enjoy my baby a lot. I completely understand with the new addition in the family there will be lifestyle changes, I cannot do all that I was doing before baby. In spite of being aware of all this, many times I feel so down, some what a fear feeling - I don't know about what I really fear, I feel overwhelming, anxious and loose my temper easily and get irritated for nothing at all.

    Need some tips on how to overcome this and get back my cheerfulness.

    I also want to be like those poeple "naturally happier".

    L,
    Nila
     

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