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What Is “peer Pressure” ?

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by anika987, Apr 4, 2019.

  1. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    I keep hearing the words peer pressure in school from my neighbors.
    What do they mean when they say
    “Competition “ and “peer pressure”?
    Can you list some examples?
     
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  2. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    For desi kids peer pressure is by reverse osmosis. Meaning -- mom talking with other desi moms and exchanging notes, then giving the reluctant-audience dad the gist of the notes, and bugging kids over the weekend to do what the other desi kids are doing after school.

    One of the best gifts I ever gave my kids was to stop talking with the hyper-competitive desi moms.

    Anika, you usually come up with such topics on late Sunday evening. This time by Wednesday itself?
     
  3. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Hee hee..I needed to know about this coz I have lot of desi moms around me whose kids are in the same school and many same class..

    Again what kind of competition?

    Either my kid is going to study well or they are not.How does it matter if the other child does well or not?

    Just wanted to know coz Both me and my child is soft spoken.Its our nature.So just want to be prepared
     
  4. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Your are mixing up things, Anika, by linking soft spoken and peer pressure. Like putting chicken chettinad in Gujarati thaali.

    Soft-spoken people are not extra susceptible to peer pressure. In fact, the strongest peer pressure that can devolve the other mom's mind into a sedimentary rock, is exerted by the quiet mom or kid who softly say, "qualified for district spelling bee" or "am skipping math kangaroo, going straight to mathcounts competition". :roflmao:

    Competition just like in India. Whose kid is in accelerated math group in class. Whose kid is reading books at a higher Lexile level. Which mom knows what is Lexile level. When did that mom learn what is Lexile level. Whose kid got the more academic teacher. Whose teacher is going on maternity leave and lousy substitute will teach rest of the year. Whose kid is writing in cursive already. Whose kid got the honor of reciting the pledge of allegiance over the school PA system from the principal's office (which means kid got sent to the principal's office but for a nice thing. :tonguewink:)

    How other child does in school matters to you or it does not. If it does not, your husband hit the lottery without buying a lottery ticket. : ) : ) Meaning you will never dump on him all your worries (on late Friday or Sunday evenings) about how your child is getting left behind and other dads are doing so much of science fair, olympiad coaching, robotics team coordinating.

    In short -- the other kids and their achievements are always in your rear view mirror. That is the competition. Such vision in rear view mirror is part of the desi mom's job description. If any of them tell you otherwise, I have a bridge for sale.

    ====

    Anika, you are such a good sport. In any thread, even in hottest threads, you never take offense at any post. You simply click Like or not and move on. True duck back for life's "rain that must fall."
     
  5. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    :thumbup:
    HC-moms manage to impose their comments/opinions on everyone in the earshot. Not volunteering information on one's own children is a good practice to thwart HCM's attempts to gain any comparative glee from such an exchange.
    Astute observation!
    And besides Anika starts a lot of threads.... i.e., has a lot more rain falling ....
    Like the old song says...
    Into each life some rain must fall, but
    Too much is falling in mine...
     
    Last edited: Apr 4, 2019
    Dhamini, Afresh, anika987 and 2 others like this.
  6. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    It’s just my nature to be diplomatic:)
    Don’t know if it is right or wrong..
    But I believe “peace is better than being right”
     
    Last edited: Apr 4, 2019
  7. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    I have lot of thoughts and my hubby says my mind races faster than the wind:)

    Some write it out,some talk it out..

    Ironically I appear quite reserved in real life and I have lot to talk about and I want to talk and pour my heart out..

    So I share my feelings whatever it is in IL.

    It helps me clear my head and relaxes me..

    IL is my meditation:)
     
  8. ashneys

    ashneys Platinum IL'ite

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    Some examples:
    Competition:
    he got 99 marks, I get 100 marks..
    Or working against him so that he gets lesser mark is also eliminating competition

    Peer pressure: many in the group smokes, so you start too to fit in

    There are many examples like this,
    A son buying a 15k saree for his wife n 14k saree for his mom will make his mom compete to get a saree for 16k, even vice versa

    So Competition is more like a race or a fight to see who’s bigger

    N peer pressure is done more to fit in, starting gym class because others are doing it, buying some particular brand or going to certain places jus to fit with the others
     
  9. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    Best comparison ever! :smile:
     
    anika987 and Afresh like this.
  10. messedup

    messedup Platinum IL'ite

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    Real examples :

    Mom: my kid will go to nursery in few months and he already know atoz and can recognize many pictures.

    Me: what if my kid will learn all this in nursery class and not before that. :thinking:

    Another Mom: my kid is in kg and she study for 4 hours everyday.

    Me: OMG 4 hours!!!my kids cant sit for 4 minutes at once. :thinking:

    AAMom: My kid know many difficult words and none other of his class in play school can know this much. I purchased books worth 5000 to improve his skills.

    Me: I too never bought extra books of this much amount and he is in play school. Should I buy this for him. :thinking:
     

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