Walmart Diagnostic Comp.

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by priyauc, Sep 24, 2007.

  1. priyauc

    priyauc Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    257
    Likes Received:
    18
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Female

    WALMART HAS EVERY THING
    One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe
    says to Mike behind him,


    "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor."


    "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.


    "There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine
    sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about
    it.




    It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . . . A lot cheaper than a
    doctor."


    So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to
    Wal-Mart.


    He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the
    urine
    sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.


    Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:


    "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy
    activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @
    Wal-Mart."




    That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe
    began
    wondering if the computer could be fooled.


    He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples
    from
    his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure.


    Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits
    ten
    dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.


    The computer prints the following:


    1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)


    2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)


    3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.


    4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.


    5 If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get
    better!
     
    Loading...

  2. puni88

    puni88 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    12,320
    Likes Received:
    7,222
    Trophy Points:
    545
    Gender:
    Female
    Good one...
    I wish Walmart had real one of them...
     
  3. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    23,655
    Likes Received:
    27,179
    Trophy Points:
    590
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi priya,,

    good one..........
     
  4. Vysan

    Vysan Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,378
    Likes Received:
    102
    Trophy Points:
    103
    Gender:
    Male
    Hi,

    Hahahahahha..............:2thumbsup: ... Good one...

    Veda
     

Share This Page