video chat and voip impact on NRI DILS

I think this happens with almost all the dils. My MIL lives with us, and it's the same story. She keeps calling her DDs and other relatives, reports everything about me. What I cook, what I eat, what I do... Only thing you can do is ignore.

 

Hi readymade,
this chatting happens to most NRI DILs...
all that i do is talk just important stuff..hubby will keep talking hours together..i go and do cooking...and peek here and there in middle...

 

i hate skype..

 

I do not change my schedule. Do all my work just like a regular day. We eat bread. If you want you can eat or else cook and eat as per your wish. I finish lunch, pack for me, dh and ds. Keep in the dining table for them. I wake up at 5 and mil wakes up only when son wakes her with coffee around 7 30. Make coffee when I make for me and put in dining table. They can heat and drink or else make them self. I get ready, make my dd get ready to school, do all job except cleaning. Go to office. Evening, I make dinner and keep it in the table. I eat and feed the kid. Go to bed. It is husband's job to eat with mil and talk with her. Later I clean the kitchen.

 

I do not know how old your kids are but after a little while they will not respond to "what did you eat today" routine every time. They will become non responsive or respond in monosyllables if asked the same question repeatedly ,kids today are good at calling off mundane/boring conversations much effectively than we were able to when we were kids.
All this help from technology to communicate faster has certainly made more room for confused conversations, more misunderstandings and plenty of miscommunication. I personally hate the long awkward pauses and the eerie silence that we try very hard to fill in these kind of communication, blabbering starts when there is too many silent pauses and leads to all kinds of miscommunications.
I wish we could go back to sending letters that takes months to reach (could even get lost in postal strikes) and traveling by ships between continents :rotfl:rotfl:rotfl

 

On the lighter side:

With the unlimited India calling on vonage lately, many folks in India are scared to answer calls from AmericaI heard of people from India saying: "I have so much work, can we get done quickly?" esp when they have many members of the family who are in the US who call them everyday.

 

Yes, vonage on phone and skype on web has made my life miserable. My in-laws and parents consider it as free service. I am thus expected to call very frequently and talk for hours and then come on skype and be there for hours after that. But frankly, the situation and expectation from my parents is much worse than my in-laws.
I understand that they think of it as another medium to be connected to us, be able to see everything without being physically present but it gets very tiring. All through the week I work full time, take care of my baby and hubby, cook and clean. At the end of the week, I am expected to call everybody from A-Z. Talk all morning to parents and talk all evening to in-laws (different time zones). Then since I have the so called free services, I am asked to be in touch/call relatives in India. On weekdays/weekends, I am expected to call family here(since we have quite a big family based here). Nobody thinks about how will I find that time among all my work, crying baby etc.

On the positive side, it makes both set of grandparents extremely happy to see their grand kids and all the new things he is learning, crawl, stand, making weird noises etc even though they are not here. Also when my mom and Mil came here, they loved to spend time by talking to relatives in India, their long lost friends etc. So for them it turned out to be a good time-pass. I an very happy about that.

Here is my suggestion. Just because they expect you to sit there for hours you don't have to. Be there fr a few minutes, show them a nice smile and say a few kind words. After 10 minutes, get up and start doing the chores /work. They would not mind it. Leave your hubby and kids talking. Once they are bored, they will wrap it up. For other relatives etc, even on being repeatedly told, I do not call them and rather do it on my own convenience. I think my in-laws and parents have gotten used to it.

 

All this help from technology to communicate faster has certainly made more room for confused conversations, more misunderstandings and plenty of miscommunication. I personally hate the long awkward pauses and the eerie silence that we try very hard to fill in these kind of communication, blabbering starts when there is too many silent pauses and leads to all kinds of miscommunications.
I wish we could go back to sending letters that takes months to reach (could even get lost in postal strikes) and traveling by ships between continents :rotfl:rotfl:rotfl[/QUOTE]

TOO good!!ROFTL indeed

 

OMG! I thought I was the only one cursing Skype! I'm scared to go online now. Same questions,what did your mom make?Of course,its never good enough.I especially try to avoid calling/skyping during festival times...oh god,all those items to be made,I can never make them right ! Not a good cook at all.
Like others do,I just make a brief appearance and then disappear.
Do you guys also face another problem?My DD is quite moody..it depends on her,if she wants to talk/video chat,she does,otherwise,its impossible to make her do so.ANd why should she?I don't want to force her.But my ILs and H take it personally. My DD is more attached to my parents,so she is more likely to chat with them.That is another bone for contention..silly,I know!