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Tried talking with MIL about monthly budget.

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Iamagoodgirl, Jan 6, 2015.

  1. Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

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    So yesterday me and mil were talking about budget.She told me its requires 22k + to run house.I dont believe it.I have done rough calculations and sum goes to max 15-16k.I told very sweetly since we are short of money lets start writing down all our expenses.So it will be easy to track expenses.Also we will be able to see whether we can save money on some fronts.

    But she threw fit.Got all emotional and said dialogue like i think we both,mil fil should start eating once a days only.Thats the only way to save money.

    I was expecting that reaction.So i just plain neglected her tantrums.Since my marriage she has treated home budget as a sacred sanctuary.She has tried very hard to keep me out of it.

    First i though since she has been home maker all her life thats the way she saves money.ie she keeps some of the money in banks for emergency.So decided to not to do anything about it.But now i discover she doesnt even have bank account.

    So now question is where 10 k is going? I have very strong doubt that it goes SIL every month.I dont MIL FIL helping SIL financially if they are in financial trouble.But they arent! Also they should do it openly.ie we should also know whats going on.

    I am going to maintain diary and wright down all expenses in it whether she approves or not.
     
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  2. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    Next time she throws a tantrum....calmly say....We have to do it for the good of the FAMILY maa....How will we all manage when we have kids.These days having kids ...their education etc is so expensive.Then show her some ways savings can be done.Check out various sites on the net.You go out of your way to show you are doing your bit.

    Some areas where reductions can be made...
    1)Electricity bills. ....
    2)Oil....talk about health.
    3)Only seasonal fruits and vegetables
    4)Stop wastage of food.

    Keep asking her for suggestions....and applaud every little step in front of the family ,giving fair credit to her....if she doesn't agree to the plan....then you go ahead and show everyone how you are making an effort.
     
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  3. SriGeetha

    SriGeetha Bronze IL'ite

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    I have read some of your previous posts..Good Luck in your monthly budget effort. :)
     
  4. mimi77

    mimi77 Gold IL'ite

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    15 to 16K per month for a family of four is really a very tight and conservative budget today considering the ever rising cost.....
     
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  5. YoGirl

    YoGirl Gold IL'ite

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    if it is just 10k..i would say just leave it...and don't bother...
    Unless she is a kind of a person who spends a lot...i wouldn't doubt her..and would assume that she is saving that money for rainy days.
     
  6. blissofmylife

    blissofmylife Silver IL'ite

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    I agree! 15 to 16 K is very tight. So do you guys live in a rented accommodation or own house? 22k itself is a reasonable budget. But again, depends on the standard of living. And remember 16 to 22 is not a big difference.. It is just 6 K.. Sometimes there might be unexpected expenditure..

    So anyway, recording all the major expenditure is good idea...
    Why dont you take over administration all over... I mean, instead of giving them money for grocery, why not buy the grocery... things like that.. it worked for me..

    But yeah, if that may turn out to be another endless battle as well..
     
  7. nb25

    nb25 Gold IL'ite

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    The sum can be large or small. But OP has a right to know where her money is going. Why should ILs throw tantrums over this, if they are using the money only for household expenditures, as they claim.
     
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  8. blissofmylife

    blissofmylife Silver IL'ite

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    @Nb25 Hi-fi.. I am LOL here in my cubicle.. Somehow, our people are never going to accept that..

    @Iamagoodgirl.. So this 22K is fully from your and your hubby's pocket? Or they contribute to it too?
     
  9. nb25

    nb25 Gold IL'ite

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    Have you tried it? Don't assume things. Try once, may be they will.
     
  10. sweetypi

    sweetypi Platinum IL'ite

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    How do you/DH give the money to ILs, ie, cheque (all at once), cash (all at once) or cheque/cash in instalments ?
    Keep aside the monthly amounts for gas, electricity bills, maids and the average that's spent on groceries. Deposit that into your PILs' a/c (or however you transfer the money to her). Or better still you or DH take over the marketing.
    That being said, 15-16K is a very tight budget for four/five(since SIL visits frequently) people in a metro, slightly less tight in a non-metro big city but may be ok if you're living in a smaller town.
    What about your PILs' medical requirements ? That can be a good amount too.

    I guess this may not be feasible in India, but online payment of bills and using debit card statements to track expenses would have simplified things for you.
     

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