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Top 3 reasons for fight between u and ur spouse

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Jaishree123, Sep 19, 2007.

  1. Jaishree123

    Jaishree123 Senior IL'ite

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    I know all couples fight for one of the many reasons.
    This is a thread in which we will discuss top 3 reasons for starting a fight.
    I think this will help us feel bit better as we will discover many common reasons among the Indian couples.
    we can also suggest some tips & tricks to avoid fights for common reasons, if some people are successfully avoiding arguments for such reasons
    I have more than 50 reasons to start arguments but I will list only 3 these are top 3. for others we will start another thread.
    first letme tell u the top 3 reasons of fight and argument between me and my husband:

    1. My Parental Family and his family
    2. His friends and the time he gives to his friends
    3. His Laziness

    he dislikes my parental family bcos the inputs his mother has fed him.
    tip I m following: talk as less as possible about our familes as we are staying in Botswana (Africa) away from both the families.

    he stays here from last 8 years so he has so many friends and weekends he wants to spend with them leaving us at home..that I hate I like rhoming around for fun.

    he hates getting up early in the morning even on working days.
    tip: I dont wake him up when he sees me getting up early everyday may be he will learn
     
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  2. aishu22

    aishu22 Gold IL'ite

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    Hi Jaishree,
    Welcome to IL. A nice thread indeed!

    Ok, my top three reasons why i pick up an arguement with my hubby is:

    1.Wen i have to manage all things at home -no help from him
    **TIP: I ask politely if he can help me out after he completes his work.

    2.Wen i desire something while on shopping which he thinks unnecessary.
    **TIP:I try to explain why i need it, still if hes not interested i just let it go.

    3.Wen food is wasted.
    **TIP:Mostly i adjust & calculate how much food is required.If so wasted on one day, i apologise & give it to the needy poor family that lives nearby my house and convince him.
     
  3. rajmiarun

    rajmiarun Gold IL'ite

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    Good thread Jaishree. Welcome to IL.

    Yeah we fight over so many things, but if we get compromised easily that is not a big issue to be pondered upon. But if we dont get compromised easily we think about it and point it out in all.

    1. We fight over his habit of chewing paan
    2. His eating habit. He prefers simple dishes and is satisfied with just a curd rice and maavadu.
    3. I cook well says all except him
    4. Laziness and non helping in the domestic front

    But still the basic love and affection leads us and wil lead us for long. But if you dont fight then there will be no spice in life.
     
  4. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi jaishree,

    welcome to il...nice thread..
    Fights should be there...according to me...small ones..where you argue or fight about the issues......

    laziness.........postponing things.....
    being lenient when he has to be strict with kids.....
    searching for the third....
     
  5. GPriya

    GPriya Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi Ladies,

    All married ones have a million reason to fight with their partner for life..

    My major 3 issues always trigger heated arguments:

    1. Finance - especially pouring money onto gifts for his family and sending money to his parents , though there is absolutley no need for it. This issue I guess 99% of our community women go thro' and can't make their men to think realistically... well.. that doesn't stop telling them its wrong.. when they have a family now to take care of. Responsible spending is very important.. and if wife doesn't talk about it, who will...as wife and kids r the worst affected in case of any disaster.

    2. Less time and attention for me (as we have no kids) and even on weekends if my hubby is hooked up on his laptop and blackberry, I get irritated and we argue..as always WORK is number ONE..

    3. The last but not least is his relaives living in and around US, cause some issues for us to discuss and eventually end up disagreeing and fighting.. as always my and every hubby I know except the wife to IGNORE and carry on life peacefully!!!!!!!! I always tell my hubby that can u tell your folks to IGNORE my behaviour for once..and see how they react... I am really sick of hearing the word IGNORE...

    Thats about it ladies..

    Geeth Priya.
     
  6. devotee

    devotee Senior IL'ite

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    Hi ILites,
    Fights in our house is usually started by me... Three major reasons are

    1. I dont like my husband's habit of spending unnecessarily... I get very angry and start an argumnet when buys some costly book or CD ...

    2. Sometimes I return home from office very tired... I have to cook, clean the house etc and I see my husabnd happily watching TV...:mad: I burst out with anger

    3. Last but not the least... Arguments over my MIL

    -Devotee
     
  7. vidyasundar

    vidyasundar Bronze IL'ite

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    hi Ils
    here goes mine

    1> he is a show piece not in the show case but on the sofa with TV remote in hand
    2> doesnt help in domestic work
    3> laziness he asks me to place the remote in his hand which will be just 1 hand away (y always foot) from him.
    :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:
    hope that my hubby doesnt surf ths site:mrgreen:

    thanks and regards
    vidya
     
  8. piu

    piu New IL'ite

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    For me Three major reasons are....
    1.MIL
    2.selfishness
    3.laziness
     
  9. Meeta

    Meeta Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi All !!!!!!
    Yes, as most ILites told, always the fight starts from my side, basically for no reason, just I am too emotional and I think hubby should pamper me like shown in movies..........
    But he is too much realistic, I understand everything but when I am off, mainly due to PMS......there is a fighting .
    Reagrds.
     
  10. malarvp

    malarvp New IL'ite

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    Oh my god!!!!

    so many ladies and still more to join this club of complaining about husband not helping in house hold work(top 1 for me too :evil: ) good comment from vidyasundar about hubby a showcase doll except on the sofa...i cudn't stop laughing.:mrgreen:

    cudnt think of a 2nd or 3rd.....but doesn't mean we don't hv fights....I'm actually a short tempered person, so fight for even silly things. :tongue he's the one to compramise.

    Malar
     

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