To forgive is a passion with me!

pavithrasriram · Jul 22, 2008

dearest chithu,
nalla topic!!1
hats-off to your friend.
my views is that the person who hurt you knowingly or unknowingly is not bothered about us else they would not have taken all the pain to hurt you.but ultimately we are the losers if we are going to get upset by it.i think they will not waste one minute over us.so why should we put all our energy on taking revenge.if they are really genuine your silence will be the real punishment for them and i am sure that time they will be ashamed of their act.instead if we continue shouting back at them i dont think there is any difference between the two and it just goes on and on and on..........
luv
pavi

CarpeDiem · Jul 22, 2008

What a wonderful lesson! It is not easy to just forgive someone when you have all the hurt brewing inside you, but analyzing it as beautifully as your friend is done makes this job so much easier. It is a human tendency to do something only if it benefits them...and hence this logical approach helps both - the "grief-giver" and the "forgiver".

Ranganayaki · Jul 22, 2008

Dear Chithra Ma'am,

Thank you for sharing your friend's teaching here. We really need practise now, to follow the "forgive and forget" path. Life is too short to keep a grudge and we need to be happy while experiencing this journey!

Ranganayaki

PoorniDaya · Jul 22, 2008

Dear Mrs. Chitra,

I needed this......thanks.

I felt so relaxed when I first logged in and read through your post. To forgive is not all easy and to brush it off with humor is the best choice. My mom always says "idukan varunkaal naguga", "dhustanai kandaal thoora vilagu", somehow I am not taken after her and just cant take things lightly.

I hope I will listen to elders like you and mom and make my life easier!!

Poornima.

Sriniketan · Jul 22, 2008

dear Mrs.Chith,
I really admire the friend of yours and his 'mantra' and also Mark Twain's words...in relation to forgiveness...
The suppression of hurt does the damage, which the other person wants to us to feel...so why yield to that and suffer...
Let us go off the hurt...(easier said than done) should practice like anyother virtue...

sriniketan

Chitvish · Jul 22, 2008

Saahithya, first let me tell you
I love your name since it is so musical - whether it be your real name or username!!
If our forgiveness is complete, we must never again think as if we obliged that person or did him a service. We have to take it that we do it for our own sake, whole heartedly.Now, don't embarass me by asking if I follow it!! I do not want to tell a lie!
Love,
Chithra.

Chitvish · Jul 22, 2008

Roopa, you sound so close to my friend!
Undoubtedly, if we manage to forgive whole heartedly, we feel greatly relieved as if there is no more "sting" in us! There is a warmth in our heart which cannot be matched.
That you have made a beginning is itself the right way to go in life.
Love,
Chithra.

Chitvish · Jul 22, 2008

Usha, what you say is very true! Do not think, I always have a forgiving heart. But that one instance made me realise what a great change, an act of forgiving, can make in one's life. I think, I owe it to God, not even to myself.Honestly, now my heart carries only fond memories of her.
Love,
Chithra.

Chitvish · Jul 22, 2008

Pavi Babes, you have a mature head sitting on your young shoulders, God bless you. Wat you write makes perfect sense - but only if we practically follow these simple guidelines!! Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself for your own emotional well-being. Sri is blessed!
Love,
Chithra.

Chitvish · Jul 22, 2008

CarpeDiem, it was the way which my friend analysed that made me blog on this topic at all, in the first instance. Somewhere along the line we beome more tolerant also - he is, as I see! He also adds that there is grace in forgiving, besides love!
Love,
Chithra.