Things you want to tell your MIL, but can't.

"Dear Mother In Law,
I dont need you to teach me how to raise my children. I live with one of yours and he needs a lot of improvement!"

 

OMG guys I feel this is a superhit thread...and really so funny..first time I read all replies...damn good...hatsof to you guys and to all MIL....
Now my case...
MIL...whenever your parent visit they never bring anything.and my they use to bring this..that..:bowdown
ME..what about 5kg sweet which you just send to all ur nabours...?.?bring by my mom..and what about ur fruit basket which my bro bring..:rant
MIL..your sanskaar are not good as ours..
ME....thatz why FIL alwz scolding u..in front of all:rotfl
MIL..after my delivery I started all work as my own
ME.. BCz u r superwomen and I am not..:coffee
MIL..I belong(her parents)from a rich family..(she use to call RAJA-maharaja)
Me..okay thatz why u are alwz crying for 1-2rs..every time..:bonk
MIL...why u select this type of strange name for your son
ME.. BCz he is my son not yours..:spin
MIL..ur parents are not rich enough like us
ME..thatz why they live in 2,000sqr house with permanent maid..and ur in 400sqr house..and you alwz cleaning vessales and doing house chores...urself..
MIL..I never use any cosmetic and nor another DIL..why u r wasting money on this..and why u use cosmetic..
ME..BCz u both are villagers and don't know how to use cosmetic and u r kanjoos how can u buy a lipstick which is so costly..??
MIL..why u wear swimming costume on beach.?you should wear saree this is our culture..
Me..BCz I know what suits me don't give ur suggestion...
OMG....enough for now..
But guys this is called rocking thread...FULL PAISA WASOOL..:thumbsup

 

I was resisting my temptation to post on this thread for long.... Don't get me started now....don't! You'll regret!

 

i dont have a MIL but my FIL fills the place very well

FIL-- we struggled a lot to come up in life
ME--- is it so?? when wasthe last time i met a person who sat and came up in life

FIL-- all my 3 daughters never used a mosturising cream even they are not after fashions
ME-- now i see a special vanity bag for themselves which is filled with all sorts of creams from head to toe and why do you need a mosturiser, a body spray for yourselves.. what sort of an example you are

FIL-- my son was born beacuse of sooo many prayers
ME-- what about your daughter they just fell off from heavens and you picked them so pity

FIL--- when ever some one visits or we visit someone he had got this story of how my late MIL got an oppurtunity to go to US and work but they didnt opt for because they had the elder daughter and the second one is one the way ... they thought a lot and opted not to go for the welfare of the kids and not to break the family

ME-- i want to play a slow melodious back gorund song and the lyrics are
i will sing of my own praises everywhere i go
i will sing of my own praises forever...........

 

MIL - my son/ daughter etc etc blah blah blah...ill...my life so pitiable..blah another half an hr...not happy with u..blah...me or my daughter so great blah blah again....
Me - (yawn) i am bored seriously...can i leave?

 

no we dont please go ahead

 

Mil--- our family is so great, we are so rich, you are lucky to be a part of our family blah blah
Me ---- can you Plz shut your mouth or should I stitch your mouth

 

there you go!
Once mil came to my parents place on the last day of my vacation in the pretext of helping me pack. I have a huge extended family and honestly i dont need her help at all. but i said ok as i diddnt want to hurt her. Honestly, i was least bothered about packing. My aunts and mom were doing all the packing and weighing and I was lazing around talkign to them and eating (i am wayyy tooo pampered by my aunts)
mil: My daughter is not like my DIL. My daugher is very organized. She packed her suitcase neatly by herself (she was joining some college for a course - after leaving job and sitting at home for nearly 1.5yrs). My family was so shocked. They couldnt believe she was in THEIR house talking about THEIR daughter like that and was getting away with it
me: Oh nice good for her...but what else does your daughter do all day? I have a full time job and a kid and a house to manage. And I am on a vacation here. Also, she has no other option - thanks to you. You dont get along with any of your relatives. Not even your own parents ! If there is no one to help, Id do it myself too! How do you think the suitcases were packed when we were coming ?? by themselves?

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I learnt music for over 10yrs (instrument) and my teacher is a very well known name and an AIR artiste. unfortunately, MIL too learnt the SAME instrument for a year. She didnt make much progress and later she gave up.

MIL: Oh, your music teacher. I heard about her. She doesnt know 'taalam' very well
Me: Really? my teacher's family has been into music since 3 generations. and it takes an expert like you to judge her talent!
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Of all the snide remarks MIL passes, the most offensive one was that I married DH for money

MIL: A lot of women marry for money these days. Look at your example. Would you marry my son if we didnt have so much money?
Me: What exactly do you have - that my parents dont? You will get a heart attack if I tell you how much property is in my name. You will get a bigger one if I tell you how many months it takes for me to earn enough to buy your house. and a still bigger one if you get to know I earn more than double your son does now. will you please shut up? and wait, did you say I married for money? WHat are you trying to do then? rememebr that match you were forcing your daughter to accept because he has a lot of property? That guy was least interested and you told your daughter to keep emailing him and calling him?????

MIL: I will slap my daughter if she asks her husband to help in the kitchen
Me: My husband WILL help in the kitchen. How that you've said this, I will record it and give it to your daughter's inlaws when she gets married. Have MCP as a criteria for shortlisting grooms. It will help

SIL: I am so beautiful !! If there was no swimsuit round in Miss India competitions, I'd participate and win
Me: I am still speechless

MIL: Your homeopathy doctor has only theoritical knowledge. He has no practical knowledge

Me: Once again, I bow to your infinite wisdom. You are perhaps aware that the Dr is a homeopathy college principal and has been practising for over 30yrs.


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there are loads really but im trying to forget th1 e past. I really dont understand why my MIL thinks she is a superior being. 5yrs since im married and I am yet to find a reason. Not just with me, she behaves liek that with everyone. and she trained her children to believe she is superior. Massive ego and illusion of being a superior being = totally fake showoff attitude; Zero modesty.

 

MIL: other dils are so much better! I rate you at 50th percentile

Me: rating!!!speechless!!!
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Mil: I will create rules for you. Those rules will not apply to my children
Me: (sensored gaalis....won't be nice if I post here)

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Mil: SIL is soo good. Learn from her
Me: no harm in learning good from others. If sil is soo good, why are you struggling to find a husband for her? No one is good enough for her eh?

 

Tulipzz,

what percentile ratings too? ???? Am really speechless...where would she be on such ratings though as mil, i wonder....