The " Someday" That Never Came .

happydheivanai · Aug 9, 2017

SCSusila said: ↑

This is about my eldest sister-in-law, a sweet lady always full of life .

She was married off as soon as she had finished her PUC ( that is school finals of those days ) . She was always thirsty for knowledge , read a lot about everything and learnt fast.

And she had a very big Bucket List of things she wanted to do . She wanted to travel widely, to many interesting places , both within country and in foreign lands .

She wanted to develop her painting skills and do large canvasses, hold solo exhibitions .

She wanted to learn stone sculpting .

She wanted to publish cook books with her invented recipes .

So many things .

And she would always be telling us , " Someday, when children are grown up and settled , and we are retired, I am going to do all this ! Just waiting for that day ! "

Her husband being on a Gulf job, she had a long distance marriage mostly , for the sake of children's education, and taking care of Father-in-law and an Aunt-in-law . So , she was forever busy running the whole show singlehanded. All that left her so exhausted that whatever spare time she got , she just spent in a little light reading and resting. Her paintbrushes were neglected .

Then , in time , children got settled , the old people passed away . The husband retired . That Someday , The Golden Time she was waiting for all her life finally arrived !

But she doesnt travel or paint or sculpt. Though herself in good health, her husband has a whole lot of health conditions that it is impossible for her to leave home for more than 2 days . When at home , she has to be full time office-secretary plus Nanny for him . Besides that , she has to babysit her grandchild as her daughter has a high stress corporate job 9 to 9 .

Now 66 years old , she jokes that she has started life all over again with two babies to look after ( her grandchild and her husband ) .

All the cherished dreams she had postponed to " Someday " never got realised .

I feel so sorry for her .

But she doesnt feel sorry for herself .

" I will do all that Someday , in the next life ! " she laughs .

God writes screenplays we can never understand .
Click to expand...

Really sad....god has designed her life in this way..at least there Childers should. Understand give her some time...

satchitananda · Aug 10, 2017

SCSusila said: ↑

This is about my eldest sister-in-law, a sweet lady always full of life .

She was married off as soon as she had finished her PUC ( that is school finals of those days ) . She was always thirsty for knowledge , read a lot about everything and learnt fast.

And she had a very big Bucket List of things she wanted to do . She wanted to travel widely, to many interesting places , both within country and in foreign lands .

She wanted to develop her painting skills and do large canvasses, hold solo exhibitions .

She wanted to learn stone sculpting .

She wanted to publish cook books with her invented recipes .

So many things .

And she would always be telling us , " Someday, when children are grown up and settled , and we are retired, I am going to do all this ! Just waiting for that day ! "

Her husband being on a Gulf job, she had a long distance marriage mostly , for the sake of children's education, and taking care of Father-in-law and an Aunt-in-law . So , she was forever busy running the whole show singlehanded. All that left her so exhausted that whatever spare time she got , she just spent in a little light reading and resting. Her paintbrushes were neglected .

Then , in time , children got settled , the old people passed away . The husband retired . That Someday , The Golden Time she was waiting for all her life finally arrived !

But she doesnt travel or paint or sculpt. Though herself in good health, her husband has a whole lot of health conditions that it is impossible for her to leave home for more than 2 days . When at home , she has to be full time office-secretary plus Nanny for him . Besides that , she has to babysit her grandchild as her daughter has a high stress corporate job 9 to 9 .

Now 66 years old , she jokes that she has started life all over again with two babies to look after ( her grandchild and her husband ) .

All the cherished dreams she had postponed to " Someday " never got realised .

I feel so sorry for her .

But she doesnt feel sorry for herself .

" I will do all that Someday , in the next life ! " she laughs .

God writes screenplays we can never understand .
Click to expand...

Really sad. But I really admire the lady who can still laugh and hope. You are right: God writes screenplays we can never understand. It is so strange to think that some women of the same generation had all the opportunities in the world to achieve all they wanted and could while others were destined to lead a run of the mill life despite all their skills and abilities.

amunique · Aug 10, 2017

i wish, her "someday" arrives soon

kkrish · Aug 10, 2017

Very nice write up. Felt a tad bit sad for your sister, though I admire her positive outlook.
Most folks never get to relish many things they want to in life because they have to shoulder many responsibilities.
Congratulations on being nominated.

LakshmiKMBhat · Aug 10, 2017

She is a

SCSusila said: ↑

This is about my eldest sister-in-law, a sweet lady always full of life .

She was married off as soon as she had finished her PUC ( that is school finals of those days ) . She was always thirsty for knowledge , read a lot about everything and learnt fast.

And she had a very big Bucket List of things she wanted to do . She wanted to travel widely, to many interesting places , both within country and in foreign lands .

She wanted to develop her painting skills and do large canvasses, hold solo exhibitions .

She wanted to learn stone sculpting .

She wanted to publish cook books with her invented recipes .

So many things .

And she would always be telling us , " Someday, when children are grown up and settled , and we are retired, I am going to do all this ! Just waiting for that day ! "

Her husband being on a Gulf job, she had a long distance marriage mostly , for the sake of children's education, and taking care of Father-in-law and an Aunt-in-law . So , she was forever busy running the whole show singlehanded. All that left her so exhausted that whatever spare time she got , she just spent in a little light reading and resting. Her paintbrushes were neglected .

Then , in time , children got settled , the old people passed away . The husband retired . That Someday , The Golden Time she was waiting for all her life finally arrived !

But she doesnt travel or paint or sculpt. Though herself in good health, her husband has a whole lot of health conditions that it is impossible for her to leave home for more than 2 days . When at home , she has to be full time office-secretary plus Nanny for him . Besides that , she has to babysit her grandchild as her daughter has a high stress corporate job 9 to 9 .

Now 66 years old , she jokes that she has started life all over again with two babies to look after ( her grandchild and her husband ) .

All the cherished dreams she had postponed to " Someday " never got realised .

I feel so sorry for her .

But she doesnt feel sorry for herself .

" I will do all that Someday , in the next life ! " she laughs .

God writes screenplays we can never understand .
Click to expand...

She is a very brave lady but I feel we should have time for ourselves, we should try to do what we want to do however busy we are. Otherwise we will never be able to. Regards, Lakshmi

SCSusila · Aug 10, 2017

@Naari
Thank you . I think she doesnt complain because she does not see what she is doing as a sacrifice for others . She did all what she did because she felt thats what had to be done in her circumstances . She has enough philosophical bent ofmind to take what life gave her . She might have had some regrets sometime , because she is human too , but has never told anything . that is acceptance .

SCSusila · Aug 10, 2017

@Rihana
Yes it is true a lot of older generation ladies were like that . They always put their own self and life after the smooth running of family . And they always got a lot of love from the family which always understood the selfless giving .
Even in a life like this , some ladies have achieved what they wished for sometimes . It all depends on each ones circumstance .
They all deserve our respect .

twity · Aug 10, 2017

91-year-old Thai woman earns bachelor's degree - Times of India

I just came across this article. The "someday" will come one day if will is there she still can do it.

Regards,
Twity

SCSusila · Aug 10, 2017

@jayasala42
What an absolutely amazing lady your Amma is ! My Namaskarams to her and such ladies.
She must be the star of the family's legends .
I agree that if these natural intelligent ladies had got formal higher education and training , they would have shone brightly in many fields . But many of them were confined to their houses . Like what they say " kudatthil itta vilakku " But i am sure they brought up children to be very good citizens.

I remembered some elder ladies in our familiy also who created songs for special occassions !

The episode of your sister's delivery , use of idli pot water etc is a awesome example of true courage , quick thinking and decision making . What a lady !

SCSusila · Aug 10, 2017

@joylokhi
I agree with you that finally what is important is to feel happy and contented with life , whatever kind it turns out . Like I said , only I feel sorry for her because of my view and opinion , but she herself is fine . So its ok !