A Tribute to the Professors of India [not all professors ofcourse], on their usage of English # Inside the Class: * Open the doors of the window. Let the atmosphere come in. * Open the doors of the window. Let the Air Force come in. * Cut an apple into two halves - take the bigger half. * Shhh...Quiet, boys...the principal just passed away in the corridor. * You, meet me behind the class. ( meaning AFTER the class ..) * Both of u three, get out of the class. * Close the doors of the windows please .. I have winter in my nose today. * Take Copper Wire of any metal especially of Silver. * Take 5 cm wire of any length. * shhh... quite, the principal is rotating in the school. * (Facing the Board) Dont talk in front of my back. # About his family: * I have two daughters. Both of them are girls....(?) # At the ground: * All of you, stand in a straight circle. * There is no wind in the ball. # To a boy, angrily: * I talk, he talk, why you middle middle talk? # Giving a punishment: * You, rotate the ground four times... * You, go and under-stand the tree... * You three of you, stand together separately. * Why are you late - say YES or NO ....(?) Sir at his best: Sir had once gone to a film with his wife. By chance, he happened to see one of our boys at the theatre, though the boy did not see them.So the next day at school (to that boy): "Yesterday I saw you WITH MY WIFE at the Cinema Theatre."