The joys and killjoys of growing old!

Cheeniya · May 1, 2007

Old age is inevitable. No one in his right mind would want to grow old if it was in his power to prevent it. Having said that, I should also tell you that growing old is not either tough or nightmarish as you might imagine. It can be fun too. I’ll tell you how.

My favourite pastime these days is to keep looking at the mirror for any new wrinkle on the exposed portions of my Adonis-like torso. I know everyone of them so well that any newcomer sticks out like a sore thumb. Whenever I sight a new one, I give it a big shout of welcome and make it feel at home instantly!

I keep marvelling at the tenacity of the few strands of hair that have stoutly refused to part ways with a head whence they have drawn their nourishment for sixty odd years. I spend hours trying to cover the big expanse of my head with those few loyal strands of hair and when I accomplish the task, I feel as elated as a Finance Minister of a deficit State who has managed the game without levying any new taxes. Or for that matter as an oversized elephant that has effectively covered itself with a bath towel.

The preceding paragraphs should not lead you to think that growing old is nothing but unadulterated fun. Just as trouble comes from nowhere in a fun filled family drama, growing old has its own share of problems. The most serious of them is being addressed as uncle, no not by teenagers, but by ladies who are not far behind me chronologically. Such encounters upset my equilibrium a lot more than the few strands of hair, which sensing the futility of it all, decide to call it a day. Or for that matter the sight of a wrinkle that gets over zealous and manages to reach my eye.

Whenever I am thus beckoned by a middle-aged lady, I run the whole gamut of emotions from A to Z. Anger at her audacity to call me so just because she is only one wrinkle less. Frustration at her skill to be able to group herself with the teenagers by calling me so. Sorrow that someone should throw spanners into my otherwise sublime existence. The horrific experience of Dorian Gray is nothing compared to what I feel in such circumstances.

That brings us to the question how does one cope with the trauma of old age if he fails to see the fun side of it?
Proclaim at every congregation that you are an old man. Someone might say, “oh, don’t tell me! You must be joking! You do not look that old at all!”
Refuse to make use of the senior citizen concession extended by the railways and airlines.
Stay tuned to World News and look for any news about a 90-year man producing a child in China. Celebrate it with your friends at your club and if it’s a twin with a premium scotch!

Chitvish · May 1, 2007

Dear Sri,
I repeat the same words – you excel yourself in each post in the “humour department” !

As if we are bothered about our chronological age! Once you are an I L ite, you really think young & act young ! This happens in my case, to Vish’s surprise ( hope not shock !).
Life is no more mundane, but colourful (pun intended!). We are able to write naughty posts non-chalantly (Meena is an exception, as you have seen by now).

If anybody addresses me as Chithra Mami or Chithra Madam, before giving them a reply, I first make a request to change their way of addressing me. Can you connect the young image of chitvish with mami, madam & ofcourse, uncle’s counterpart ?? One dare not !:evil:

But there are some advantages in my case, Sri. I preach in my religious forum, but let myself go to my heart’s content in other forums, more so, of late, in yours. I just want everyone to feel that we do have many facets as an individual and I am no “ashadabhoothi”. Your example of your Atman Friend comes to my mind ! Not to forget Manjula’s grandfather. It is like
Raman ethanai Ramanadi !
But ofcourse, he did’nt think the same about Sita is beyond my comprehension. The less said, the better.

We, as senior citizens give joy to others, but very often , they by their ways & words, prove to be killjoy to us !Little do they realise that with every passing year, they are nearing the receiving end !

But I do not give up the privileges given to a senior citizen when I travel – I hate to climb upper berths ( I can do that effortlessly is besides the point) and by flight, I want to save money for Vish.
Don’t be surprised if I come back again in this thread with more thoughts – well, you can never give me up !:-D
Love,
Chithra.

Cheeniya · May 1, 2007

Dear Chithra
Bothered? Who would ever be bothered that he is old if he has grown old the right way?! In fact, I have never felt as youthful as now! I should again thank my friend Sunkan for making this possible by bringing me here. My previous thread and its responses simply blew the myth of old age to smithereens!
I forgot to tell you one thing more about how to preserve our youthful image. I do it by offering my lower berth to a woman half my age and take her upper berth instead! I keep imagining about how favourably impressed she might be about my chivalry!
How would I ever know if she was thinking, "Look at that old bugger! Even at this age, he tries to impress younger women! cradle snatcher! nalla jollu!' :mrgreen:
sri

chitrajan · May 1, 2007

Dear Sri,

Each of your articles excel the previous one. :cool2:

You have rightly taken Yayati's principle of enjoying life to your aging in years (physical years only) and here we are, enjoying the benefits of your experiences in the process.

My experiences at being addressed mami and patti from my wedding day by new relations on the in laws side did put me off initially, but the funnily this has helped me to sort out people!:tongue

I already enjoy my aging (Incidentally , I age very slowly) and hope to avail of all associated benefits - within the family and elsewhere too ignoring the childish references to my age and exit from the world gracefully.

By the way, it would be butter scotch icecream for me :mrgreen: so that my celebration would be complete.

Cheeniya · May 1, 2007

Dear Chitra
My sammandhi amma calls me 'Mama' from day one (then I was just 50!) and I take my revenge by calling her Mami twice in a row everytime. It is not that being called Uncle or mama puts me off but the sinister purpose behind it causes me anger!
My grandchildren calll me Thatha and slowly everone has started calling me so, wife included! I try to stand erect like a ramrod, flex my muscles and flash my youthful smile but no one is interested!
Thatha has come to stay!
Sri

sudhavnarasimhan · May 1, 2007

Dear cheeniya sir,
I loved reading the part of your favourite pasttime.....was dripping with humour and what imagery.....had a good chuckle to the surprise of my daughter , who has been glaring at me , sitting in front of My laptop( she has broken hers,, so i am parting with mine from tomorrow....and she has nothing to lay her hands on....! )....and i had to shoo her away before i could become one with the virtual world again and get connected mentally!

But i must say i see your counterpart in my dearest hubby, who has started all the counting and covering, andlong hours in front of mirror , not to mention the fitness tests and looking at the fitness equipments( 2 are lying redundant, is beyond his comprehension !) And that is making me conscious too....so we have started discussing the pros and cons of aging beautifully, fittingly both physically and mentally....which has consciously brought us closer! Which i feel is another plus for a Newly Growing Old couple! he he.....:tongue

Well as for the mamis and pattis..... in a way i miss that here, since even a 10 year old calls me by my first name in my class, ( no teacher, or Miss) which used to sound funny, annoying at first.....but have got used to it....(cultural difference!)

abhatv · May 1, 2007

Hello Cheeniya sir,

A great post as usual. I seem to remember that earlier you have said age is only a state of mind and I am in complete agreement with that. Now how come you are suddenly troubled by anyone calling you mama or thatha?

You should come to Bangalore and have some interaction with the local vegetable vendors. Irrespective of the age of the customers, they address them as akka/aunty or anna/uncle according to their gender and all this when they themselves are in their sixties or even seventies. I used to find it very funny initially when I came to Bengalooru but am now used to this. Is it the same in Chennai?

Regards,

Abha.

Cheeniya · May 1, 2007

Dear Abha
What a keen memory you have! What appals me is not being called Uncle but when it is done with a purpose, I get agitated! But dont you worry, I take it all in my strides!
Chennai also has a similar practice and so I stopped going to the market
Sri

Cheeniya · May 1, 2007

Dear Sudha
Does your hubby also ask the mirror on the wall the age old question and does it boost his ego saying he is the one? Mine goes a step further. The moment I start, Mirror, mirror on the wall, it blushes a deep red!
How I yearn for the young ones to call me by my name! To make it simpler, I sign myself Sri but many think that I have made a spelling mistake and start calling me Sir!
Sri, SRI, SRI,SRI:mrgreen:

Chitvish · May 1, 2007

Dear SRI,
One can pardon being called Mama, uncle etc; but how to cope up with the local lingo
" Ae Perisu, gammunu veettile kundhikunu kidakkama aen ingae vanthu engalai bejaru pannare?"
To be addressed Perisu is the limit to beng insulted !
I also notice this is a recent term in Chennai. It used to be "periyavarae", which has now "dwindled into" Ae Perisu !
Ofcourse if you are called Perisu, I am insulted as "keyavi" !!
Oh, the woes of chennai tamil !
We look (?) young, think young, behave young but are thought of differently !
Love,
Chithra.