The Art of listening!

honeybee · Jul 24, 2012

Listening is an art.I love to listen... the sounds of the universe-be it the birds chirping cheerfully or a distant train speeding.It is said that the world around us is in constant vibration- some audible and many unheard.

Listening is less demanding compared to talking,because we can listen without restrictions.There is no need to exercise caution fearing that it may hurt somebody,instead it can make people happy because
finally they have found audience.All we need is patience.

But are we going to retain all that we hear?
We all know the story of the 3 monkeys..I would like to follow the principle of the 3 monkeys.
A fine reed was passed through each monkey's right ear.

In case of the first monkey,the reed came out through the other ear.
In the second.. the reed came out through the mouth
In the third.. the reed was retained.
I prefer to ignore gossips,rumours and back biting.Listen and let go.
IF I hear about somebody's good deeds, noble gestures,helping tendency,achievements and preachings that make a difference to the quality
of our lives- I listen,retain and spread the word.
When people confide in me I prefer to retain what I hear and maintain silence.

If we want people to listen to us then it is important that we present our viewpoints with clarity and at the opportune time.
Men of all ages become temporarily deaf if we request them for help when they are busy either watching television,browsing or engrossed reading the sports
column in the newspaper.:rotfl

Here's an incident which taught me the importance of result oriented talk..
I normally accompany my DH to buy vegs and fruits during the weekends.One particular Sunday since we were expecting surprise guests for lunch, .I requested him to buy the vegs himself and he obliged.I sat in front of the refrigerator and began telling him.. " I have brinjals,....".He stopped me short and quipped.."Why are you telling me what you have?There is a chance of me being inattentive,interpret things wrong and
buy all that you already have. Instead you should tell me what you need!".I realised my folly and promptly made a list and handed it over to him.

It happens with most of us... We miscommunicate and blame the others.
Let's learn to listen,digest what we hear and then speak the relevant.

strangerrr · Jul 24, 2012

had a little smile at the incident. even my amma used to do this way (i used to say don't provide unnecessary infos)

i my pov the art of listening includes filter the words heard and allow it to flow in 3 directions (up towards brain / down towards heart / straight towards another ear) accordingly who said that & why they said that..

nice & useful read, honeybee

strangerrr · Jul 24, 2012

duplicate entry - pls delete

honeybee · Jul 25, 2012

Hi strangerrr
Thanks for the first comment and a very meaningful one too.:thumbsup

We women have the habit of thinking aloud... we speak as/what we think. So it is not just your amma..:rotflIt happens everywhere.

regards
honeybee

Viswamitra · Jul 26, 2012

Dear Honeybee,

Very useful blog about listening skills that one needs to build and communicate the right thing. Listening is an important trait that we need to build on our own. Sometimes, silence or word not spoken is deafening. Other times, words not spoken provides us more information than what was spoken. When we used to go to meet with companies we target to buy, we used to carefully find out what was not disclosed in the management meeting and intensify due diligence in those areas. We also need to avoid preparing our speech in our mind while others are talking. This is the most common mistake many of us do.

Communication is also an art. We need to only communicate on a need to know basis. It should be effective and for a purpose. We need to avoid unwanted conversations. We need to choose the right medium to be effective between verbal and written. We need to learn to watch the body language simultaneously when we hear the words. Mostly, the body language conveys more than the words.

Viswa

honeybee · Jul 26, 2012

Viswa sir
Thanks a lot for your valueable thoughts.Reading your comments has always been a learning process and a pleasure too.:thumbsup

regards
Sowmya