Hello, In last 6 months, I have been invited to few get togethers which had an element of surprise for me, by the host. Though not hugely problematic, they all have the same pattern. Since, it is the same pattern, I was thinking if it is me or it is something that people always do to others... So, the thing- I get an invite. I say yes. I ask who else is invited. They say something real (real name of family) + something vague (keeping a secret of the other person invited). Since, I have said Yes, I don't have any leverage to ask the question more firmly. They don't have any incentive (my yes) to give me correct answer. In one case, my friend had invited her ILs, and she had referred to them vaguely as "one other family".Why won't she say my ILs In other case, another friend invited "one other family" and this was a family I have known since last 10 years through preschools etc., but not met at a party. Why won't my friend just say the name? In third case, yet another friend answered "one other family" and it was a new neighbor. This new neighbor is more my neighbor than my friend's. Any input to what I am not seeing, missing, what shd I do, why they would not tell me the answer In all cases, I was not harmed in any way by meeting any of surprise elements but I said at host not answering the question. Since, it was 3-4 family get together, I had a right to know I think.