Suggestions required to deal with Silent Treatment.

coolpinky · Oct 18, 2012

Dear All,
Thank you very much for the continous support being given to me when required. This forum really helps me to stay calm and think on what should be done
rather than just screaming and yelling around which I used to do earlier.
As of now, there has been some significant change in me in my day to day life.
My MIL as usual is taunting me and is being very nice to me as of now as she has again laid foundation for misunderstanding between me and my DH.
Because of this my DH is agian gone into silent mode.
But this time I did not even bother to ask him the reason.
Instead I tried to remain happy for myself by reading books, playing games on my laptop, listening to music, watching movies on my laptop etc.
I go to sleep before he comes, but I wake up when he comes. He puts his hand around me while going to sleep and I reciprocate. Thats all.
Apart from that I have minimised the talks with him I talk to him only when required.
Apart from this is there any way by which I can deal this silent treatment?
Please suggest.

smritisinha · Oct 18, 2012

Just behave as if you don't know he has gone into silent mode! Just behave like you didn't notice and carry on your cheerful chatter with him, MIL, everyone.

He'll eventually think an know that there is nothing wrong with you or in your intentions!

WHY DO GUYS SULK SO MUCH!!! Gawd!

coolpinky · Oct 18, 2012

Hi Smriti,
As I mentioned earlier I keeping my talks minimal with him and only him. I am normal with my PILs
As I told you earlier my MIL is very good at me now.

nandita24 · Oct 18, 2012

I am reminded of this joke:

A husband and wife were disagreeing with each other and the silent treatment was under way! The silence continued, when a week later the husband needed to get up at 5am to catch a business flight. His alarm clock wasn't working, and he grudgingly realized that he needed his wife to wake him up.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence, he wrote down on a piece of paper, "Please wake me up at 5 tomorrow morning so I can catch my flight," and put it on her pillow before she came to bed.

The next morning he awoke to find that it was 9am, he heard his wife in the kitchen, and he had missed his flight. He noticed a note on his pillow, "It's 5am... Wake up!"

So coolpinky, wait for your opportunity!!!!

deepd · Oct 18, 2012

nandita24 said: ↑

I am reminded of this joke:

A husband and wife were disagreeing with each other and the silent treatment was under way! The silence continued, when a week later the husband needed to get up at 5am to catch a business flight. His alarm clock wasn't working, and he grudgingly realized that he needed his wife to wake him up.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence, he wrote down on a piece of paper, "Please wake me up at 5 tomorrow morning so I can catch my flight," and put it on her pillow before she came to bed.

The next morning he awoke to find that it was 9am, he heard his wife in the kitchen, and he had missed his flight. He noticed a note on his pillow, "It's 5am... Wake up!"

So coolpinky, wait for your opportunity!!!!

Click to expand...

Good one Nadita!!!

Coolpinky
Your dh is not talking to you but still keeps his arm around you when u r sleeping That means he loves you but doesnt want to initiate the talk because of his ego or brainwashing by MIL or something...

deepd · Oct 18, 2012

continue being the way you are right now. Show him that you are not even aware of his silent treatment!!! I think this is the best way to deal with it Good luck!!!

nandita24 · Oct 18, 2012

Here's another : Maybe he too is helpless? So what?... even God is!!!!

A Man's Heartfelt Prayer

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. All of a sudden, he said out loud, "Lord please grant me one wish." Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice the Lord said, "Because you have so often tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The man said, "Please build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over any time I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is difficult for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish."
The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say 'nothing', and how I can make a woman truly happy."
There was silence for a few minutes and then the Lord replied, "D'you want two lanes or four lanes for traffic on that bridge?"

coolpinky · Oct 18, 2012

Dear Deepd,
Yes my MIL is responsible for this. She just lits the fire and remains quiet. Its me who has to suffer every time.
My DH carries it forward days together and then she would be very nice to me during this phase. Once my DH is back to normal again MIL taunting starts and the cycle repeats.
Dear Nadita,
That was really a good one. I wish I could get such an opportunity.

christine014 · Oct 18, 2012

Hi Pinky,
If you act like you didn't notice how your MIL had brainwashed him, maybe everything will go back to normal after a few days. Because sometimes men take it personally when it comes to their mom, and its good that you are not paying him much attention. Let him take his time and come back to you. But be patient, rather, maintain the patience you're showing now. I'm sure everything will be fine. Take care.