Should Childless Couple Be Encouraged For Adoption?

Your bro and SIL are not kids. You have suggested Twice, and he has very clearly said. That means No.
And No (from an adult person especially) means - pls. dont bring it up again.
Don't spoil your relationship by forcing the topic on him or her.

 

Don't mistake but they are adults here and let them decide what is right for their lives.
I too have a brother but after a point my maintain my boundary when it comes to his life.We are very close but I still feel there should be an unsaid boundary.

Not everyone needs to or is in favor of adoption.Let them take sometime and when all options are exhausted,they will finally decide or ponder over adoption if they want to.

Maybe, you can indirectly without hurting talk about them losing weight as it does play a big factor while conceiving but even that you need to be very careful.Already they are in an emotional stress so it is better to back off for now.

It is nice to know you are concerned for them and you seem like a good sister but it is best to let them decide about what they want to do and how much they are willing to try.

I myself had a child through IVF route and my hubby was not for adoption.It took many years but we waited and noone forced us.It helped us emotionally a lot.

The doctors are the ones who can actually advise a couple about weight issues and IVF if it is worth it.My doctor bluntly told me to not worry about a child,take up a career and be happy even if I was childless.It did not bother me as it came through her.So,what I mean is the right person needs to talk.

Wish them luck and pray for them.You are a nice sister who will be happy for their happiness and probably very soon they will be blessed Good luck

 

Seeing only one doctor for 5 years and not seeking a second opinion is the only questionable thing. But, there might be good reasons for this too.

Other than that, your brother is doing a great job of figuring out their way through this struggle. You and your parents should trust that they are aware of all the options available and have the ability to evaluate these and seek professional advice if needed. Be there for them. Be available to listen without giving unsolicited advice. This is the most precious gift you can give them.

If you have helped or later will help them with money, it becomes even more important to bite your tongue. This infertility phase will end one way or the other in a few years. How you help or hinder him will impact your relationship with him for ever.

To answer your specific question -- there is no way to encourage a sibling or friend who is not by himself in favor of adoption.

 

MYOB.
It is highly offensive, cruel and inappropriate to badger a childless couple to “just adopt”. It’s doesn’t matter what their family members or the sabziwalla or the lady next door thinks they should do.They are aware of the option and it is their own decision.
It is a special kind of hell that they are going through and if people cannot be supportive they should hold their peace.

 

It is their personal decision...most couples want some to have their own biological child and can go to any extent to do so..I think you shouldn’t nag them to adopt. Let them only decide what to do once their options run out..regarding finances, yes IVF is expensive, so you may decide to not help them financially with their next IVF cycle if you do not have hopes of them succeeding this time..that’s your choice...but adopting or not is their choice..

 

Adoption is a sensitive issue, no one can be forced upon this decision. A Couple has to make up their mind and be mentally and emotionally strong.
I believe that, whether it is our own sister or brother, we cannot discuss about a child, because it solely depends on the husband and wife as to how they want to have a child.

I am sorry if i sounded harsh, but try to divert your sis in law towards a healthy hobby, she will need a change now.

Regards
Nandini

 

Going through infertility and treatments is mentally and financially draining. It takes a toll on couples. Refrain from making any suggestions to your bro and SIL unless they ask you for an opinion. Adoption is a very personal decision and should not be forced. You don’t have to convince them to take adoption route! They are adults and can decide what’s good for them.

Sorry if I am rude, to me it appears you are very judgemental. Commenting they are obese, had so much treatment and all is not right. It’s there life, not urs!

stay away from them!

 

You are a good sister, who thinks & understand how your brother & SIL feel, can't withstand thier pain. Unlike some mil & sil not seeing this opportunity to taunt the DIL of the family.
Your good thoughts & prayers will do miracle.
At the same time you can't suggest an adult to adopt.
It's a big thing for people from conservative society. In US many go for adoption, it's normal here but in India it's still seen taboo.
So pls maintain personal boundaries. Support them emotionally.
It's very normal in big cities like Delhi Mumbai that people get loan for fertility treatments.

In an ideal society doctors should suggest adoption after multiple ivf & surrogate failures.
Relatives suggesting such things will impair relationships forever. You pls pray for bro.