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Shall I Marry Unmarried Guy Though I Am Divorcee

Discussion in 'Life Without Spouse' started by cutypie143, Feb 9, 2017.

  1. cutypie143

    cutypie143 New IL'ite

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    Dear ladies ,
    I am 27 years old .. At age of 23 ,I got married and it just lasts for 3 months n then we got separated ..
    now in 2015 we divorced each other.

    I got one proposal from matrimony guy is from Delhi and 28 yrs old , unmarried, well educated, well settled , matured enough..

    He is having intention of marrying me even his parents agreed to accept me ..Guy is tall dark n handsome even I m fair, well educated n have nice status ..

    Now my question is what makes him to marry a divorcee girl though he has ample of best options in front of him ...

    I asked him in all ways but his answer always Yes ..I asked him to do all necessary tests and he is agreed on it ..He is like he is seeing me as my wife and want to get marry with u ..

    Ladies out there please help me with proper guidance ..
     
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  2. memeera1234

    memeera1234 Gold IL'ite

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    Don't mind, but it's better you do a background check on him before you jump the wagon.. I maybe wrong, maybe he loves you genuinely and I sincerely hope i am wrong. But it's better to be safe than sorry.. all the best!!
     
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  3. cutypie143

    cutypie143 New IL'ite

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    memeera1234

    Yes u r right ...I m gonna check his background as well..As that will be my intention ..
    But even tell me how to check his background details as I m frm pune and he is frm delhi

    Thanks :)
     
  4. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    Op....
    Is your family much better off than his ?
    Will there be dowry given?
    Are you the only child?

    OP, there is not much alarming in him being eager to marry you because it is quite possible he likes you a lot .....but a little surprising to know his family also wanting the same .Unless they are extremely liberal....it is unusual ,specially in arranged marriages.
    If indeed it is true,it is a pleasant surprise.If this was a love cum arranged rishta,it would be less alarming.

    Do get a thorough background check done.
    I hope everything turns out good and they genuinely want you in their lives for just you.
    Best wishes OP.
     
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  5. DDream

    DDream Platinum IL'ite

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    OP , I agree with others opinions above. You should be very careful
    "He is like he is seeing me as my wife and want to get marry with u .." I cannot believe this statement.
    Just by looking at your matrimony profile how can one decide that way. Did you see this guy and his family members. What extra benefit is he going to get if he marries you. Is there any finance involved ? Are you working?

    As it is your second marriage, you should be very careful. Do a back ground check. If he is working, then you can also inquire there. If you have any relatives or friends in Delhi, may be they can help.

    If its a love cum arranged marriage or if you were dating for years, my thinking would have been different. May be he is genuine, but make sure he is.. Take enough time. Don't bend in or fall for his/his family's words. Make sure that you are taking the right decision .
     
  6. paru123

    paru123 Gold IL'ite

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    OP, pls can you ask any of your confidante ppl ( dad, bro, friend or any close relatives who are your well wishers to go to Delhi and check the background oftheboy. His office, his residence, his friends and relatives.

    Hope they are genuine prople.
     
  7. KashmirFlower

    KashmirFlower IL Hall of Fame

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    In my view, third party agency type background helps. Because it would be secret. If your parents/close ones are doing this inquiries someday (if you marry that guy) it may come out.
     
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  8. cutypie143

    cutypie143 New IL'ite

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    yellowmango

    Yes your concern is right ..But dear I m nt only the child of my parents ; I have younger brother .. And I have huge oppose of dowry n my family too ..He doesn't know my financial status as I m belong to upper middle class family but I didn't told him this bcz of same reason..

    Nope he is from matrimony , if we got married then it ll be arranged marriage only ...And he want to get marry me next year as his grandpa recently passed away but he is ready to come n meet me personally as soon as he gets cured bcz before 2-3 days we met he got with accident now he is on bed rest...

    Moreover , I will check his background as I m having one relative who has people in PAN India ..Will take out his help..

    Thanks for all of u who give me suggestion..it would really help me a lot to make my decision ..

    Thanks a lot :)
     
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  9. cutypie143

    cutypie143 New IL'ite

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    paru123

    Thank u ..Yes dear..But now my family taking their steps back to marry me in intercaste relationship ..with their prior permission I said to this guy n also informed him that my parents will be ready for our marriage if everything goes well between us ..

    But today itself my mom saying how u cn marry intercaste bcz earlier I said them that as it is my 2nd marriage so I cnt put conditions abt castism ..Personally I dnt believe is caste ism ..I believe human should be of good nature n should respect women and in all odds n downs he should support her...that's it ..

    And he seems promising but u never knw so when I will meet personally I will get more idea ..

    Fingers crossed :)
     
  10. paru123

    paru123 Gold IL'ite

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    Don't promise anything and also don't give any hope at the moment. It is actually strange of him telling that he wants to marry u without even seeing u once and that too he is unmarried and you a divorcee. You can always tell him that you are waiting for your parentd appproval.dont give him much access into your life till he clears the background check.
     
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