Servant Maid Issues

Dear ,
You have quoted me wrongly here

 

Both Nakshatra and Sandycandy have quoted wrongly.
Sandycandy also has failed to discern the difference between
‘Majority’ and ‘all’ but then point others as ‘arrogant’. I am amused

 

Having a maid is an individual preference. Having maids doest make a person lazy or doing all households works doesnt make a person a superman/woman. If one wants one and can afford, we shouldn't question their intention or judge. And it is also providing employment to these women who are uneducated and want work for livelihood.Also adding that this safe option for these women who can otherwise be abused or harassed by men in other work environment.

 

Show me one post of mine where I used ‘lazy’. I already said in my first post in this thread that if one is using household help for altruistic purpose of helping downtrodden or for their livelihood, go ahead. But do not degrade them. If one learns to manage their employment, one also should learn to manage their household help. Be a strict employer if one doesn’t want to give advance or other perks, if helpers dont like this, they may seek different employment if their employers don’t treat them well, law of supply and demand in play.

Senior citizens cannot manage their household work themselves due to old age is one thing but people in 20s -30s hiring people but then complaining about their attitude and seeking suggestions to manage ‘idiots’ is another thing.

 

You are amused, I am sorry ! Mostly for people like you ! Alas, artificial intelligence doesn’t help with emotional intelligence .

You sit on your high horse and declare that people that hire maids have no dignity of labor . You declare that you work more hours than your Indian counterparts. If that is not arrogance what is ??


.

 

Well most agree here that OP should have refrained from referring to her maids as 'idiots' or whatever. And no one is actually encouraging this attitude. But to judge a person who wants to have maids just based on this attitude isn't right because one wants to have maids for different reasons.

Having said all these, maids too take advantage of people and try to impose their opinions when they know they are in demand.But it will be good if OP introspects as to where she is going wrong and tries to rectify that or learn the art if handling these people.

Anyway I do not want to post further on this, because it is deviating from the main issue. Hope OP finds a solution that works for her and her future maids.

 

Mr Greenbay.

I understand what you are saying...assume you don't have a kid? All bets are off with a demanding baby at home, regardless of geographic location.

For many first generation immigrants, maid service is decent paying job than working in farms or fast food industry. These days, good maid service costs same as IT job hourly rate. The couple currently service our home, working for us more than 10+ years. Willingly we pay 50% if we miss their service appt., +10% per service, 1-time service fee as bonus and occasional lunch gift card for two etc. If the maids are not comfortable, they will not come back and eventually, the house will be 'branded' by their secret maids union? Trust me, the entire neighborhood will know about 'you', if the maids are leaving after a brief service. It is no different than India! In that aspect, we live in a similar society.

I also believe, trustworthy maid is a blessing!

 

Why did AI seep into this discussion? You want to bring baggage of my disclosure elsewhere into this thread even though it is unrelated to this discussion?

In your opinion, I do not have emotional intelligence? You don’t know me personally to derive that conclusion. I believe( and I could be wrong in my belief) that you tend to be testy in your responses to my even normal replies. If my enquiry in Y & R months ago is still bothering to show your ill-temper towards my even usual responses, sorry, my friend, you have to let it go. Life is too short to carry unwarranted grudges.

 

Op...the one advice I would give is ,treat them like working women with more problems at home than we do.

They may be doing a 45 minutes work but it is work that we are finding difficult to manage. Besides they work in many houses because they need to.

Regarding taking leave,how many people work every single day without weekly holidays. They do . So if they ask for leave ,give them without questioning why .Just let them know you expect to be given some advance notice or in case of emergency leave,you expect her to give a call early morning so you can manage yourself.

Very often,if you give them leave willingly ,they also don't feel the need to lie and make excuses. If they do...you can always change them

Don't get emotionally involved . Have a professional relationship. You both need each other.
If things don't work out,terminate their services respectfully without any bad blood. This is not just respectful but also builds your reputation . Smile if you meet her somewhere ,ask how she is and move on . Basic courtsey to another human.

If she talks unnecessarily,let her know you don't like talking much .Some maids talk and gossip because a lot of employers encourage it . If you remind her a few times ,she will get the point.

Let her know you manage the household so she should talk to you regarding stuff she needs and not to your husband .

 

Should people in India keep maids for working?
Yes they should because they can and people need jobs.

The day people stop needing these jobs,people will find it difficult to get maids and learn to adapt .

My personal opinion is that if you can afford to employ people,do so . Employ as many as you can without breaking your bank .circulate the money .

Our car cleaner takes 500 rs to wipe the car 5-6 days a week / month .It takes him a few minutes to do the job . He had mastered the art of car wiping .The same work takes us much longer .

He cleans about twenty cars in the morning before he heads out for his job.

That car cleaning job probably pays for sending his kids to a better school .

Can we clean our own car?..of course . But it is one more chore and it is pretty cheap. The day it gets unaffordable ,we will get our own bucket and cloth and wipe our own car .Till then,let us employ and be helped .