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Self Realisation

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by messedup, Aug 4, 2021.

  1. joylokhi

    joylokhi Platinum IL'ite

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    Thank you for your reply. That's definitely a very positive way of looking at it. However when faced with such embarassing situations ,it is very difficult and the other party would most often construe the blame on me too! Anyway, looks like too much water has flowed and cannot expect any change, so need to out up with it!
     
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  2. Hopikrishnan

    Hopikrishnan Platinum IL'ite

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    You are a trooper. You probably have a double entry book of joyful-embarassing situations, and striving very hard to keep the joyful column add up to more.

    The proverbial "crazy aunt in the attic" happens in life when one-in-a-couple goes out of whack in social niceties, and the outside world blames the couple for all slights. Taking the meeting/entertainment/hosting off-site is one workable solution; however, that would be pretty "foreign" to do in India.

    Good luck, and happy life.
     
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  3. joylokhi

    joylokhi Platinum IL'ite

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    :blush::blush:
    Thanks again, just speaking of it has lightened my mood. And, your suggestions of avoiding ' At home' entertaining is what I strive unless compelled to. Thank you for the wishes too :blush:
     
  4. NOW

    NOW Silver IL'ite

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    Nicely put and this alone is worth a life time's practice. Striving to be positive while enduring all that life throws at you. I saw an interesting video where Oprah Winfrey said this " You need to fill your cup so that you can be so full, your cup runs over and you have enough to give the other people. If you don't fill your cup, then you end up dried up, tired, exhausted. You don't have enough to give other people and end up resentful every time some body ask you because your cup is empty and now they want some of yours. So, your number one job is to fill your cup and make yourself whole."

    May be one way to not involve ego or fear or greed dictating your emotions is to try to raise above them by filling your cup first and prioritizing yourself.. That could be anything that engages your body, mind or intellect and makes you happy.. when you are considerably happy with yourself may be the **** you have to deal with becomes a little more bearable ..
     
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  5. messedup

    messedup Platinum IL'ite

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    How much the cup should be when we start feeling its full. For that we need the feeling of contentment. At what level we will be ready to give..
     
  6. messedup

    messedup Platinum IL'ite

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    I never want to eliminate her. Also that's true we not much negative for each other. We do have positive time when we like each other a lot. Talk a lot laugh a lot. But the difference that I see is she is a mother and I am a DIL. She always feel same for everyone but my feelings change with the attitude of other person with me. I expect her to change and she expect me not to change, both of which is not correct. With that expectation I start feeling negative about her and she too start doing odd things and stay angry with me. It keeps our ego fight with each other. She feel that I should not react like that and I feel that she should understand my point of view too.
     
    Last edited: Aug 6, 2021
  7. Hopikrishnan

    Hopikrishnan Platinum IL'ite

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    All this dithering does no good to you or your MIL.

    You need to train your MIL to fear you at sight. Until you can do that, you will suffer. You have to grind her spirit into the ground. Stalemates between you two will be bad for BOTH of you. It is natural for the old people to wither and go away, and let the young ones to take over. However when the young are spineless, and fuzzy, we do them a favor by killing their spirit, so that our spawn would find a new one who has the spirit to stand up and fight.

    Whenever you read respondents on this or any other site, you must remember that you are in the struggle for real. The internet people are merely offering their mode of doing things. Much in the personalities and powers are left unknown.
     
    Last edited: Aug 6, 2021
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  8. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    The jottings vis a vis the title looks enigmatic .

    The definition and meanings of self-realisation in different philosophies are widely vary.
    For example in Sikhism,
    upload_2021-8-6_17-39-47.jpeg

    However I liked the collection of nuggets which are thought provoking.
    What I conclude after reading books on self realisation is that all of us are essentially a bit of God at some Time and in exceptional cases we could become all of God.

    But then why you have brought in the karma factor here!
     
  9. messedup

    messedup Platinum IL'ite

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    Karma factor is because I used to think that I am doing things for people even if they are not for me still they have negative feelings for me.
    The realisation is that I get the bitterness for them doing nothing and what I am doing had that in it and I was always giving them back the same bitter attitude. It made both of us equal. Doing nothing and doing something with negative vibes are same. Even latter is much worst that I was doing.
    I am still developing the negative thoughts and know that these positive things will not remain inside for long.
     
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  10. NOW

    NOW Silver IL'ite

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    Figuring that out and not giving up on finding what is causing the negativity in our lives and turning it to positivity is the whole point ..isn't it?? This will vary from person to person you can start at any level and go higher no matter where you start.

    Personally, if I just focus on doing my duties to the best of my ability with positive mindset and not expecting immediate return is what looks like a successful day to me. That does not mean I will not hold others accountable, but just have a balanced thought process instead of spiraling into negativity and bitterness.
     
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