Science/Rules of Marriage per hindu culture/vedas

Hey,

So we have vidhis (rules) to do poojas , marriages.
Do we have anything which says how a husband should be,
how a wife should be.We have all heard many things in lectures , movies.
But living experiencing is real tough.

As we all know we know good couples who love each other and live very well.
We also know those couples who are married but are fighting all the time.

How can one guage who is right and who is wrong.I know there things like wife devotes her life for husband.And poeple wont talk about husbands.Most likey husband also devotes life to his wife.EXPECTATION is the biggest problem.

So say for example, a couple got married.During marriage there was lot of drama and fighting between both families.
You can guess right , bride takes her family's side and groom takes his family side.
Who is right and who is wrong no body cares.
This starts the quarrel between couple. Now the marriage is completed.
Everyone else is happy, both the families are happy.

The couple is only fighting every day and night about the drama during the wedding and new things come up every day to quarrel.
This has turned out like boy does not respect girl's family and girl does not respec boy's family.

The realty boy and girl are living just by them self in Australia. They have these fights all the time.

Boy had expectation like girl should wake up, wake him up , cook some food he likes and keep him happy.
Girl wakes up late like early noon , boy has woke up got ready and is at work.

When boy asks girl to wake up, she gets so mad on the boy and curses like anything.
This is just one thing that happens every day.

so again who is right and who is wrong.

boy lost all plans for his future, never has peace of mind.

Boy would like to find if there is something really called destiny.Is every thing already written like this has to happen to me.

People think we make our own future ( you are the architect of your life).There were many other girls he saw , but choose this woman to marry.
People also say marriages are made in heaven , where is heaven.

Any way everybody has sad story, this boy is just putting out.
sorry for the trouble.