Relearning- the joy of giving and sharing

Shanvy · Oct 1, 2009

Donate blood and enjoy the joy of giving screamed the pamphlets and the posters. The whole of last week, I have been facing the same joy of giving week everywhere.

Be it papers, the cricketers, the schools everybody talks about the joy of giving.

I go to pizza hut, they want you to donate rs 10. (the amount is very small), but do you think forcing us to give is good?

Last week at Westside, I was asked if I would like to light a diya, and the proceeds of that would go to a needy organization. I told the guy, I would like to donate the diya also to the needy. he said that is not in their policy.

We are basically the most giving people in the world. When and why did we stop sharing and caring. We do not want to give a helping hand to the old lady who wants to cross the road because we will be late to the place by a minute??. We do not want to give the food that is left over, to the needy, but want to keep it in the fridge for a day/week, before you decide you do not need it and ask your maid to take it home. (This happens in many a homes.)

Navarathri, purattasi (the auspicious month to go to tirupathi). We have a inflow of people asking for help to go to tirupathi, perform marriage. The same person would have come the month before saying it is my sister’s marriage. I would have given 10/50 rs to them, and got scoldings for the same for being a miser too. When I question how come she is coming for the same marriage, she starts of scolding me so rudely in telugu (assuming I do not understand) and then I tell her, if you are in need of money why don’t you work, she says why should I, and who are you to ask me.

I give money, thinking my maid cannot pay the fees for her kid, and she takes it, and then I come to know that she gets a scholarship, and the money I gave goes towards getting her the latest clips, bangles and things
It does definitely leaves a bitter taste in my mouth but does not stop me...

Did we need a Mr.Venkat Krishnan, to start the Give India movement and then come up with the joy of giving week to awaken the dormant giving nature. I don’t know.:idea

may be the joy of sharing, giving, caring has got lost because of above stated incidents too.

How many of you did see
Each one of us would have been in the shoes of the boy with the lollipop, many a times. But overcoming the temptation to enjoy it and to give it to the boy on the street is the best form of giving. Just look at the smile on the other boy after receiving the lollipop. Well it may be a lollipop to you, but the smile says it is a treasure to the other kid.
Maybe we did need the week to tell us to rekindle the feelings of joy of giving..

Well giving a handful of what is in your overflowing basket, is not going to put a dent in your basket but starts filling an empty basket.

Here the basket, is figurative. Each of us can do our simple deed that makes a pleasant, satisfying feeling. The deed could be in kind/action.

I stand in the ration queue to get the oil, wheat, and other things, to be sent to the orphanage and old age home I patronize, collecting the ration cards of the neighbors too sometimes. The satisfaction, that this will go towards feeding a few elders and kids gives me the strength to stand in the same queue again again.

The simple prayer the orphanage says for my family (the person calls me when they say the prayer) makes me donate for a day’s meal almost every other month.

The more I reach out, the more I learn of things, and I enjoy the joy of sharing along with everybody.

It is nice to know that there are lot of individuals and organizations coming forward to think of giving back to the society. Look at goonj, where a revolution is taking place, A piece of cloth that does not mean anything to us is not just a piece of cloth, but is going to help a lady, a kid somewhere.

Let us leave the skepticism of whether what we give goes to the needy, do our part of giving with a prayer hoping it reaches the needy.

I have a prayer of pardon for myself..

Dear god, my intention in helping out was genuine, if somebody is misusing it, and if I am a part of it without my knowledge, please forgive me and show me the right direction.

Joy of giving should be felt all through life, not restrained to just this week. Don’t you all agree??

archana.kc · Oct 1, 2009

I agree totally Shanvy. It has been there in our culture. Somewhere down the line, like a lot of other good things we have lost - we have lost the joy of giving. I have received mails about this joy of giving week, and was wondering why we need a campaign to do this . But I guess it is imperative to repeat things when insensitivity creeps in!

Love

Arch

Meenupanicker · Oct 1, 2009

Hi Shanvy
very good work.also thought provoking ..........Felt like a presentation. Thankyou very much
Its that smile on that boy's face which is valuable.I believe if we have something with us today its not my merit...............also if that boy lack the same its not his fault.So what is the right to hold yourself all fortunes when if God decide these riches will not last for the next second.If God decide we will be the one next to that boy begging for alms.I remember reading in newspaper on the day of Gujarat earth quake many people woke up in the morning as business men capable of having breakfast, lunch and dinner in three different countries and styles begging for their food in the night on the very same day.So we have to share that kindness from God with those around us.

manchitra · Oct 2, 2009

Hi Shanvy
i hope the post of yours says how good at heart you are. Oh God! give me the good mind to help others.
The lollipop clipping says it all, what sharing is about.

Anabika · Oct 2, 2009

Dear Shanvy mam,

I have read all your other blogs so far and I feel all of them send a message to the reader and So is this one.

I totally agree on this with you.

"Dear god, my intention in helping out was genuine, if somebody is misusing it, and if I am a part of it without my knowledge, please forgive me and show me the right direction." - These lines just touched me.

Anabika

chithradhamo · Oct 4, 2009

Dear Shanvy what a great heart you have . you prayer just moved me. Yes ther is so much joy in giving. a sense of satisfaction .

varalotti · Oct 4, 2009

Dear Shanthi,

I was especially moved by your prayer to God to pardon you if your giving is abused. Well, that prayer is in-built in the act of giving itself. But the raider is that we should also apply your mind.

I have a policy of not giving a single paisa to the beggars. Because you are helping a group of people who have decided not to work. My friends argue that at least I can give to handicapped people. That's an even more dangerous policy I tell them. These people know our feelings and maim the children to evoke our sympathy. Didn't we see how they were blinding the unsuspecting children in slumdog millionaire?

Once when I was explaining my policy to a religious speaker he told me that the tree gives its fruits indiscriminately. Why should not we give as trees. I told him on his face that we are not trees. Since God has given us intelligence we have a moral duty to use it and give only to those who genuinely need them.

Once when I was waiting for the train at Egmore a person with bandages all over his body came for help. He told me that he was caught in an accident and had just come from the Government hospital. And that he needed money to go home. Will you please help me? Many people were ready to give money to him.

I told him he was lying. He was in tears. Others frowned at me. Then I gently told him that in a Government hospital they would only use the gauze for bandage and not an ordinary cloth. If he still insisted on his version I told him that I was prepared to miss the train and we can go back to the hospital to check the facts. The man slipped away silently.

Two people in IL have their own way of celebrating the Joy of Giving week. One is Mithila Kannan by her beautiful thread on spontaneous giving and the other is you, Shanvy, with this beautiful blog.

You have given us all something very good. thanks.
sridhar

amihere · Oct 5, 2009

A nice written and well said blog, dear. It is true that once in a while people do misuse the charity they get and often depends on it as the sole source of earning. Many of the beggars have lots of amount as savings but they don’t use them up and living in a good way because then we will stop giving. I always prefer to buy something from a person than donating alms to a beggar (unless he is too old to do some job). My mom thought me this ,she says “the person who is selling peanuts , the girl who is singing in street , the guy who is collecting bottles are trying to make a living so help them whenever you can” . She will have peanut packets in her bag most of the time because she ends up buying them to help those and forgets about it after coming home. John D. Rockefeller has best said it “Charity is injurious unless it helps the recipient to become independent of it.”

Shanvy · Oct 7, 2009

Dear Friends,

I am sorry for not yet coming to acknowledge all your replies. a little busy at the home front. ok.i hear you "shanthi, we saw your replies else where.." well i thought i will reply to the blogs my friends write here before replying here. after all giving a fb should be bringing a smile on the faces of every one of our friends here.

so bear with me will be back to discuss more with all

Arunarc · Oct 8, 2009

Dear Shanti
I totally agree with you dear. That was a beautiful ad dear. Both the kids were so happy with what they have done.
Joy for giving shouldn't be just for a week it has to be any time through out the year.
many misuse when we give something to them but can we do anything about it, we give thinking we have helped the needy. but do they use it for something that they really need it for.............
Liked your prayer Shanti