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Reasons for divorce ??????????????????

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by anika987, Jul 25, 2013.

  1. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    It seems to be the "in" thing today.

    Infidelity,physical & mental torture is fine but these days two individuals divorce for baseless reasons.From what I hear,they cite incompatibility,unromantic,no chemistry as the reason.Well..wat to say?

    Has tolerance level gone down?people r not ready to workout?why marry that too an arranged marriage if people do not want to work things out?

    Some women think if they earn well and can be independent,they do not need to compromise.Men aren't any less!

    the situation these days is sad.

    my good friend is suffering coz the girl left him coz she feels nothing for him.he was ready to change for her completely.

    Are all love marriages successful?
    life is not a movie where romance and duet songs happen all the time.people should stop watching those movies!

    watz going on?
     
    Last edited: Jul 25, 2013
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  2. Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

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    Do you think you can fake romance and intimacy with a guy if you feels nothing for him for next 30-40 years?
    People change... oh i dont buy this at all.
    I do believe people remain same at core.They change temporary then bam back to normal.
     
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  3. Twinkel

    Twinkel Platinum IL'ite

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    The individuals in divorce that you are referring to are grown ups, mentally stable and are capable of logical thinking. Do you think anybody would initiate a divorce just bcuz its "in" thing? Well, if they cite reasons like incompatibility or no chemistry, it just means that they are not willing to discuss the details with you and are asking you indirectly to stop poking your nose in his/her private matters.
    And yes, if you feel so sorry for your friend that he is suffering for being all good, then, sorry to say dear, either you are missing the other party version, or your friend is trying to wear an extra nice dress... What goes into a marriage, what exactly happens between the couple, nobody else would know apart from them. A marriage breaks because both or one of them are not happy, and chose to depart for their own good. Reasons which feels sensible and ok for you may not seem to be the same for others. You and me cannot judge what was the exact "in" thing.
    Their book, their chapters, their stories. Give them the liberty to be own authors!
     
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  4. flowerlady

    flowerlady IL Hall of Fame

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    Nowadays people rarely want to drag divorce cases for years and agree to mutual divorce based on incompatibility , no chemistry etc. They also don't want to wash dirty linen in public and hang on to a dead marriage.
    Men always had it good and the DW had to tolerate all sorts of abuse, mental harassment ,EMA s, not now.
    The girls are well educated and can stand on their own feet, even parents do not force them to stay with a man they dislike.
    The woman need not bend backwards to stay with the husband.
    We tend to side with our friends and paint the other spouse as heartless and cruel.

    Your pal is suffering because he is has been 'left' by his DW , he is on the receiving end .
    Don't worry he will bounce back with remarriage soon enough.
     
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  5. hermoine

    hermoine Silver IL'ite

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    personally i also feel that tolerance levels have gone down...and people are not willing to make things happen after certain point of time...

    some people who are afraid of society...parents name...stay in such problematic marriages...but some people who love their life more than anything simply part their ways to be happy for themselves...

    again former case is more dangerous than the latter...why to make a DD or DS a bad DIL or a bad DH by setting the problematic marriage family environment...
     
  6. swamy24598

    swamy24598 New IL'ite

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    totally negative......
    According to research 83% of love marriages are failures.. at one stage or the other
    Romance????????? what you mean? mean real Love???
    hahahahha.. cant find out nowadays between couples after 1 year of marriage

    Whats going on??... good question... but no one can give real answer coz all those (in question) are real craps

    2 mycents
     
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  7. destinedfate

    destinedfate Silver IL'ite

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    I agree with twinkel, things arent always what they seem and what you hear isnt always the truth. Personally i went for my divorce because my husband never saw himself as wrong, and I knew I would never be able to handle all the antics of my inlaws. Were these the only two negative things in my marriage? Absolutely not. Friends and family know more details to my divorce, but for people who I am not close to I just say that we werent compatible, only because they dont need to know all the details, and they just wouldnt understand. I still remember my ex husband telling one of my uncles that he had no problem with me, wanted to make it work, will do anything I say.. all these words while crying.. my uncle came to me and was like think about it again, this guy seems like he genuinely cares. The next convo I had with my ex husband he told me I had to cut ties with my family if I come back.. and that he always will have the upper hand because he knows how to emotionally manipulate people and can always make me look like the bad person.. I recorded the conversation and had my uncle listen to it.. and he finally understood that my ex husband has many different faces that he presents. That was a trait my husband had.. his parents to.. they know how to seem so innocent in front of people, so no one would ever think they would do anything bad.

    All I am saying is that we are so quick to judge based on what little info we know, when the truth can be something completely different.
     
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  8. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    just as I thought.Sorry twinkle dear..when I read ur thread..i felt I missed something.Now I know the answer why u replied the way u did.good luck with ur life dear
     
  9. Twinkel

    Twinkel Platinum IL'ite

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    My thread? what thread are you talking about? I haven't posted any yet [​IMG] And if you have something up in your mind, let me tell you, am happily married and very much in love with my dh :) Thanks for your wishes, am already in luck with my life and my darling hubby. May be you read threads of some other member :)
     
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  10. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    take care .
     
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2013

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