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Re-marriage after 50?

Discussion in 'Life Without Spouse' started by muts, Jul 5, 2010.

  1. muts

    muts New IL'ite

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    Is it ok for a widow woman to consider re-marriage at about 50?

    Do this happen in Indian soceity?

    How would one react to this suggestion?

    I am writing this with great agony....
     
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  2. SriVidya75

    SriVidya75 Platinum IL'ite

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    Does Age really matter??? Man/Woman needs a companion. So why worry about what age is right to get married?? Please do not pay attention to what the society thinks or what people would say! They might/would talk for couple of days and then everything will go back to normal. But just for the sake of what society thinks, dont give up on your happiness.

    Its really a good thought about getting remarried. Good Luck to you and we all wish you the very best to find your companion.
     
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2010
  3. priyapraveendvs

    priyapraveendvs Bronze IL'ite

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    hey srividya hats off for your suggestion .
    yes i accept sri vidya.

    age is not at all matter.

    trust, and love is imp in marriage life.

    and everyon ein earh need other someone own person .
     
  4. contented

    contented Senior IL'ite

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    Dear Muts,

    First of all 50 years is not at all old. In Western Countries, many women get married and have babies in their 40s and 50s.

    Its when you become old that you really need a companion. At that time will society be with you ? Will society give you the love and understanding that you will get from a partner? NO. Then why do you want to bother about what society will tell?

    Yes maybe some people will comment, but for how long can they do it? If you are strong and you dont allow people walk all over you, they wont.

    -C
     
  5. iamsudha

    iamsudha Senior IL'ite

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    Muts,

    Sure. Go ahead and find your companion. Be careful about marrying too quickly if you are rich and have soem liquid assets that may attract the wrong type of men.

    If you were in the west, I would have advised a boy friend kind of arrangement until you know that he is the right guy but in India that may not work out well.

    Good luck to you.
     
  6. airdeals

    airdeals New IL'ite

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    Do you have any kids? How is their reaction? Rest of the society's opinion does not and should not matter that much. Good luck.
     
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2010
  7. Sabitha_K

    Sabitha_K Gold IL'ite

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    Dear muts,

    What is okay to me might not be okay to you , would again be okay to someone else.This is a very relative term.Hence the responses you garner would also range from abject depravity to liberation of woman when it comes to remarriage at the age of 50.

    Before you even consider remarriage, ask yourself one important question.How important is society and its influence on you ? Are you someone who crumbles when someone passes a slight remark at you (OR) are you someone who shrugs of snide remarks with flippancy and least bothered ?

    If you are someone who is very sensitive to the comments of others then you might have to think twice before venturing to remarry.You may have a lovely husband , peace and comfort in your four walls which you might not be able to realize wondering what is everyone thinking about me.This constant apprehension would ruin your happiness and cause turbulence in your married life as well.

    Muts, I am not against remarriage, in fact a great advocate of live life to the fullest.I have seen several times that it takes great courage and determination to pull through some circumstances and if you do not have the calibre and attitude to handle it then you might just be better off where you are lest you regret.I hope I haven't discouraged you in any manner and just trying to guage if you are willing to take a bold step and not look back or worry what everyone is thinking.It is very important for you to understand your strengths and limitations.I hope you take a wise decision.I can't advise you on attitude towards life , do's and don't in life as you have seen more sunny years than me and what counts now is ARE YOU WILLING TO STAND BY WHAT YOU BELIEVE IS RIGHT ?

    It is easier for me, sitting miles away from you, to say 'Damn the society' BUT you have to answer what it means to you.Does it define you ? Do the views of others create a powerful dent on your life ? Does it deflect your reflections ?

    Think carefully and I wish you all the best ..
     
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2010
  8. Sudha Kailas

    Sudha Kailas IL Hall of Fame

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    Muts, age does not matter dear as long as the man and woman are comfortable in each other's company. At the age of 50, it is definitely important to have a companion and there is nothing wrong.......

    I know of 2 people, both divorcees's married after 50 plus and they are both very happy......
     
  9. muts

    muts New IL'ite

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    Thanks for all ur replies!

    Well what if she is slightly conservative yet sucessful women in carrer?
    when she has kids aged about 25 and 20?
    How would such a women look at the idea of another marriage ?
    i want her to be happpy...
     
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2010
  10. contented

    contented Senior IL'ite

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    Hi once again. When I replied earlier I thought you wrote this post for yourself. Now reading this I think you are either asking because you want somebody to get married or because you want to propose to someone. Either ways I know you are asking for her welfare only.

    Well what if she is slightly conservative yet sucessful women in carrer?
    when she has kids aged about 25 and 20?
    How would such a women look at the idea of another marriage ?


    See Muts, you will have to ask her yourself. Sometimes it might be difficult for adults of the age of 20 and 25 to give someone else a father's position. But you can talk to her kids too and find out whether they would like their mother to have a companion in old age.

    i want her to be happpy...

    Well Muts, you can put forward the idea to her and tell her the pros and cons of remarrying and leave the decision to her.
     

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