Raising a bilingual child

nuss · Mar 13, 2014

My husband (an American) and I (an Indian) met in graduate school, fell in love and have been together for 6 years. Before our son was born (now 16 months old), we talked about teaching him Hindi as well as English. Hindi is my native language and my family back in India understands English but not everyone is comfortable speaking English, so it was given that I'll teach my child my language.

For first 12 weeks of his life, he heard mostly Hindi because I stayed home with him. Since I have a full-time job, I'd to go back to work and that’s when I realized the hardship of raising a bilingual child.

My husband is still learning and cannot speak Hindi fluently, therefore, we speak English at home. My son goes to a babysitter who is a bilingual: English and Spanish. Most of the time, I speak with him in Hindi but lot of times I forget to switch back. I read a lot about raising a bilingual child, talked to people who are raising bilingual kids and everyone stressed on the importance of me speaking in my language all the time that I spend with my son. It’s hard but I’m sure it is worth.

I have also heard from many people that bilingual kids take longer to speak. However, my experience has been different. At 16 months, my son can speak at least 50 words clearly and able to comprehend both languages fairly well. His vocabulary consists of a mix of Hindi, English and a few Spanish words.

English: Baby, Go, Night-night, down, up, nice, please, book, bath, bee, boots, socks, ball, kick, nose, toes, tea, door, there, cave, tunnel, apple, rock-rock, help, sweetie pie (more like bappi pie), balloon, nice, tie (hair tie), fly (butterfly), snow, help, ride

Hindi: baal (hair), naak (nose), aankh (eyes), daant (Teeth), Gai (cow), Chai (tea), doodh (milk), baahar (outside), khidki (window), joota (shoe), cheenti (ant), kela (Banana), Naa (No), haathi (elephant), kursi (chair), ek do teen (one, two, three), shabash (very good), dhakka (push)

Language neutral: Mamma, Daddy, Cracker, cookie, noodles, coat, diaper, pee pee, Burt (his teddy), Bye, truck, bus, car, bubbles, blocks, train, uh-oh, beans

Sounds: Meow, woof, puk puk (chicken), roar, ki ki (monkey)

Spanish: Leche (milk from bottle), adios, hola

He loves playing hide and seek and would say: Whe ditt go (Where did it go?) and then will answer in Hindi- ye raha (here it is). He also tries to sing a Hindi nursery rhyme- lakdi ki kathi…….

It is hard for me to always speak Hindi with him especially when we have company and no one else speaks/ understands the language but every time he says a word in Hindi it makes me so happy. I am trying to find a group of Hindi speaking people so he can hear the language a little more and also looking for some good Hindi board books. If you have any suggestions/ tips please leave a comment.

1Sandhya · Mar 13, 2014

Congrats! Great decision. It will take some work but ultimately it is very rewarding. When he is old enough to use full sentences, talk to him only in Hindi and make him reply to you in Hindi. Do not respond or reply till he rephrases in hindi. It will force him to develop grammar vocab etc. Doesnt matter if there is company. This is called immersion and used by teachers in Spanish lang classes in schools. It is one of the most effective things I have seen.

Laks09 · Mar 13, 2014

Looks like he is doing great! I can't think of a thing more you can do. His vocab is great in both languages. I would probably just add the Hindi class when he is older. My older one speaks both languages. We had a stint in India for a couple of years. That's when the language skills exploded but even prior to that she spoke and understood our natives language! Now she takes language classes over the weekend to read and write(which even I can't since I was brought up out of state).
My little guy is autistic and is still picking up words in both languages. What helps is that one of us uses English and the other parent sticks to our language.
As he grows older you can introduce him to cartoons like Chota bheem. You could also try the Amar Chitra Katha comics in Hindi if you manage to teach him to read.

pumpkin01 · Mar 13, 2014

In our case, we got mixed advice from many, some said speak in your mother tongue, some said speak in english, my husband and I speak both in English and our mother tongue and we think due to this baby's speech got delayed. Now we are speaking only in English with him and he is speaking many English words now but many are not clear It's great to hear few words like clock he says cock cock ...... Apple as Aeppa Aeppa ..... ha haa

I think your kid is doing great

guesshoo · Mar 13, 2014

Keep at it, nuss dear. Keep talking to him in Hindi. Even when there are friends around, I suggest you address him in Hindi. When he replies in English, I suggest you acknowledge his reply and also translate it to Hindi once for his benefit.

i wasn't too particular about my dd, who will soon be 3, learning our mother tongue. However over the last couple of months my husband made an extra effort to specifically speak only our language. When she replies in English, he translates it for her and she usually repeats it herself. Though she thinks in English, her usage of the language has increased drastically. My little sleep-talker has even started speaking our language in her dreams which she never did till now!

A friend of mine lives in Europe and is married to a European. They speak to each other mainly in English, dad (plus environment there) speaks in his language, she speaks an indian language to the little one. The European language is the child's first language. When she was 4, they realised during their annual India trip she had picked up the indian language so well that she spoke like a native. She had also managed to pick English up just eves-dropping on her parents!

For most kids the exposure to the sounds of the different languages at an early age makes the most difference, I feel.

nuss · Mar 13, 2014

Thank you all! Great tips. Sandhya, most of my friends who work at school with international students suggested me your approach (immersion). Laks and Guesshoo, Yes, environment makes a big difference. My son picked up so many Hindi words during our 3 week stay in India. He picked up the'ed' sound that my husband stil can't make after 6 years of learning because the sound doesn't exist in English. Pumpkin-your son is doing great. Every kid is different and they def fo things differently/ at different times. My son used to say 'bapple' instead of 'apple' and oranges are still apples for him. Funniest one is- help, for longest he said 'wow' when he meant "help".
Reading and writing is something I will need to find out how/where to send him. He has no interest in TV so far, but that might change. I'd look for some good cartoon s, chota bheem is agreat suggestion.

1Sandhya · Mar 13, 2014

Force him to converse, the brain makes many connections when put on the spot. Expose him to as many new sounds as possible before age 10. His palate and brain are still forming unlike your husband so he will pick up very easily. There are many sounds in Mandarin/Japanese that we cant pronounce becos we are adults now. Youtube is a great resource for rhymes and songs. There are several websites you can google. tulika books has bilingual books (same sentence in 2 languages) for when you next visit India. And of course there is always Amazon.

indoc · Mar 13, 2014

Bilingual and multi-lingual kids are more smarter and intelligent than others.. but don't force any "preferential language" on him.. once your baby starts going to school the lingua franca will be the school language.. and Hindi will be mom's language..

Rakhii · Mar 13, 2014

nuss, you are already doing a great job. In my case, there was some delay in language unlike yours. What we usually do at home is speak to her in native language. But we switch to english more often than I would like it. Bottom line is, as long as you are able to talk to him in Hindi "most" the time, you should still be OK. My daycare is purely english but mine loves to watch Dora. So she picked up a lot of Spanish words too. For now most her communication is in English, followed by my native language (she fully understands English and my language) and a few words of Spanish. Kids this young pick up languages much quickly and easily than we think. You are doing everything right already. Keep up the good work.

One tip though, dont force him. It hardly ever works, not with me at least. You give them options and let them choose.

lol for "wow= help". My 2+ year old calls my day care provider "lunch" when her name is Cherry. She still does it! I dont know why. "hi lunch", " i love you lunch", "bye lunch"...lol

annabunny · Mar 13, 2014

Hi hun,
My DS is a bilingual child. He is 28 months old and understands English, Hindi, Punjabi and Igbo (West African language).
The only tip I can give you is to speak as much as possible to him in your mother tongue and ask you DH to speak to you son in his mother tongue. All kids will learn english anyway when they go to school, play-group or watch the telly.
My son was slow in speaking but we never bothered about it, we knew he was going to speak, sooner or later.