Procrastination

Sapna56 · Jun 11, 2017

hi all
i had arranged a party recently for our anniversary. Me and my husband are not very social. Also it keeps happening with us that our friends keep on inviting us often and we only go whenever it's possible for us. As we both are working and have kid we often prefer to relax and be at home on weekends.
Also I always had very bad experiences after making friendships. It always happens with me that I introduce my friends to each and other. Then eventually they will get so close and I ll be left alone.
Same incident happened recently. I arranged a party i just casually introduce two of my friends to each other. And now I am left out and they have become too close.
I now feel that I wouldn't have introduced. I am still feeling bad for my self that why did I introduced each other.
It had also happened with me that my friends will know each other because of me and soon they start gossiping about my life.
I don't want this to happen and so I kind of don't prefer to introduce.
Please suggest.

ashneys · Jun 11, 2017

This does happen. Sometimes, other people may connect better. It's not a bad thing.

But being left out sucks, that's bad. Esp if they Make any plans without you in the picture, it's worse. In this case, you should voice it out to your closer friend out of the two.

I have been on both the sides. Me introducing to others and others introducing to me. In both the situation, I am always happy if this introduction works and friendship blossoms. Because it means more of us could hang out together. But, if I or my friend feels we are left alone due to this friendship. It's always voiced out. We call or meet and say that we are feeling left out and feeling possessive. And we all plan to meet together. If they respect your friendship, they will respect your feelings too. But we are also matured enough to be reasonable and understand that sometimes others may connect a lil more.

When two people get together, it's a very common topic to talk about people they both know. From school to now, when people get together, I have seen people discussing about common friends they share. Not necessarily it's about bad things. Its about everything that happens in their life, their progress, new job or something they did or any good and neutral things too.

If this bothers you so much, better don't introduce people any more. But at a party, people may introduce themselves too and can still connect. So there is only so
much control.

Umanga · Jun 11, 2017

Sapna56 said: ↑

hi all
i had arranged a party recently for our anniversary. Me and my husband are not very social. Also it keeps happening with us that our friends keep on inviting us often and we only go whenever it's possible for us. As we both are working and have kid we often prefer to relax and be at home on weekends.
Also I always had very bad experiences after making friendships. It always happens with me that I introduce my friends to each and other. Then eventually they will get so close and I ll be left alone.
Same incident happened recently. I arranged a party i just casually introduce two of my friends to each other. And now I am left out and they have become too close.
I now feel that I wouldn't have introduced. I am still feeling bad for my self that why did I introduced each other.
It had also happened with me that my friends will know each other because of me and soon they start gossiping about my life.
I don't want this to happen and so I kind of don't prefer to introduce.
Please suggest.
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Keep your friends and the different parts of your life separate. Do not bring them together. Do not host parties. Meet your friends separately. Relax and enjoy yourself at home at the weekends with your husband and child. Do not force yourself to socialise.

Sweety82 · Jun 11, 2017

Enjoy ur life alone. Unless u believe that the person is trust worthy, do not share anything with the person. This society is very bad and ppl around u irritate so much by behaving like this. Ignore them. Keep a distance and enjoy ur own company.

Sweety82 · Jun 11, 2017

Don't think too much abt these ppl. It is not worth. Think abt only ur child and ur husband. enjoy with ur kid and hubby. No other person can be a better companion.