Power of Words-in relations

Tridev,
I am sorry for your situation. hope your marriage gets better.

It was not my dad , it was my brother who abused me. My dad was great to me but was abusive to my mom and brother. My brother took his anger on me by abusing. Now he is in a marriage where both are abusive to each other. He is in a situation like yours without respite. Though for long I feared and hated him. Now i feel sorry for him. He was a victim as much as I was.

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Putting a check on abusive language used in the beginning is very important, especially after marriage.

I have zero tolerance towards using filthy words. Never been a practice in my family or my extended family be it my mothers side or fathers side. Me or my siblings have been so.

On the other hand using bad words is like drinking water for my FIL and DH has learnt the same I feel.

My Dh does not use filthy words but speaks Dirty which we cannot think of also. I cut this right from the beginning and its come down drastically. Those words he has said ecohs in my ears even now and I would never forgive him for that.

 

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