1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

pls.help me to decide correctly very urgent

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by harun, Nov 5, 2014.

  1. harun

    harun Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    343
    Likes Received:
    9
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi,
    Last month i had been to delhi for my official trip and during which time i bought 2 watches one for my husband and another for my dad both same brand,colour and diffrent model.i also bought various other items which i distributed after my return.But i kept these two watche for their birthdays..last week was my husbands birthday and gave the watch which i bought for him from delhi.To my surprise he liked it so... much ,and was wearing throught last whole week except slepping timeand also was shwoing everyone that i bought for him.He even showed my dad with great pride,and he also liked it very much.Now my dad's birthday is just 2 days from now,shwould i give him the watch which i bought him or not.Will it spoil my husbands mood as he felt so possisive/special about that gift which i bought for him.And if he sees similar watch i gave to my dad on similar occasion like birthady he will feel sad/disappoinded.
    I have earlier given him many other exepnsive gifts ,but this seems to be something special for him ,so only i ma so concerned.
     
    Loading...

  2. sumanrathi

    sumanrathi IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    2,997
    Likes Received:
    3,202
    Trophy Points:
    308
    Gender:
    Male
    Show the watch to your hubby and ask his opinion.
     
    5 people like this.
  3. superwoman09

    superwoman09 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    826
    Likes Received:
    530
    Trophy Points:
    188
    Gender:
    Female
    Two options, one ask his opinion as sumanrathi suggested but there is a chance that he may feel bad that you bought another similar watch to gift your dad. You can guess his reaction better that us here so decide accordingly.

    What I would think best to do is to buy something else altogether for your dad. What to do with the watch remaining..not sure.
     
  4. SriGeetha

    SriGeetha Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    41
    Likes Received:
    35
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi Harun,

    I feel that you bought similar gifts for two men in your life because they are equally important to you.

    So why now have change of thoughts ? Do go ahead and give the gift you bought for dad also.
    In fact have done that myself many times and told them both that they are equally most important for me :).
     
    3 people like this.
  5. AprilLisa

    AprilLisa Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    393
    Likes Received:
    396
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    i think you should give the watch that you got for your Dad.....

    you might be thinking about your DH's feelings now, but once think of your and your dad's feelings that you kept in mind when you actually bought those watches.....
     
  6. hope2b

    hope2b Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    230
    Likes Received:
    192
    Trophy Points:
    93
    Gender:
    Female
    Would you be OK if the opposite happens, your H gets gift to you and your mil same thing? Also how are your H relation with your folks?

    One suggestion, you can let H know that your dad liked the gift you gave to him that he was inquiring about it. So you feel that a similar watch would be a good idea for his bday. Ask his opinion. May be that way you will know
     
    Last edited: Nov 5, 2014
    2 people like this.
  7. Akanksha1982

    Akanksha1982 IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    3,633
    Likes Received:
    4,986
    Trophy Points:
    308
    Gender:
    Female
    How about you give something else to your Dad this year and maybe next year give the watch to your dad. Hopefully, by next year, your DH will not be much into this watch and you would have gifted him something else for his next birthday.
     
  8. shari2003

    shari2003 Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    355
    Likes Received:
    242
    Trophy Points:
    93
    Gender:
    Female
    I am sure most wives including me do not like the husbands gifting the same kind of stuff to the spouse and MIL/ SIL. But, about men, am not so sure. it might probably depend on the nature of the person involved.

    Last year on the occasion of my cousin's marriage I was looking for a gift for her fiance online and found a watch. I liked it so much that I bought that and another very similar one for my DH too. But, once the watches arrived, I told about both the watches to DH. He liked them a lot, wore the one I bought for him and was happy to gift the other to the cousin's fiance.

    So, if you think your husband may not have a problem, you can gift the watch to your dad, else go ahead with another gift..
     
  9. kcb

    kcb IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    1,736
    Likes Received:
    3,282
    Trophy Points:
    335
    Gender:
    Female
    Show the other watch which you bought for your dad to your husband and ask his opinion and tell him what you are thinking about giving this gift to your dad.
     
  10. FromMars

    FromMars Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    559
    Likes Received:
    745
    Trophy Points:
    188
    Gender:
    Male
    I second the opinion of not giving your dad the watch for his birthday and gifting something else. After a couple of weeks or a month, gift you dad the watch.

    The normal process of when buying similar things for multiple people ( on a visit to a different place or store ) is that they need to be given to all of them on return and not to be saved for their special days.

    The conversation will be, hey DH, I bought this for you from Delhi. I also bought a similar one for Dad. You can choose whichever you like and I will give the other to dad ( I am not advocating your DH do the pick, it could be the other way, no rules ).

    Birthdays are special days for special people. Its not the gift but the thought which matters. From your dad's point of view, he is getting the same gift as his son-in-law and there is no novelty, no thought. From your DH's point of view, that he thought was special for him, which he got on his special day, is not special anymore.

    If you have to buy ahead for special occasions, buy different things according their tastes. If not, give them immediately on return, just like you distributed the rest of the items.

    So, after your dad's birthday, one day show your DH the other watch and tell him that you got another for your dad, but didn't present to him on his birthday ( with the reason mentioned above of course ). Then, you can give it to your dad.
     
    2 people like this.

Share This Page