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Parenting Mistakes I Noticed

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous in Parenting' started by amnilakshmi, Feb 18, 2020.

  1. amnilakshmi

    amnilakshmi Gold IL'ite

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    Hi,
    This is a incident that happened a few weeks ago. I was travelling in unreserved ladies compartment in a train which was very much crowded. There was a family with a mom and two children- the elder one was around 14-15 years old and younger one was around 8-9 years old. The mom asked the elder girl to sit in the upper berth and also told that there are chances that it will get filled up. Soon a lady came and also sat in the upper berth and the girl acted as though she was sleeping. The compartment started becoming more and more crowded. The girl was pushing the lady away as the lady was sitting very comfortably occupying most of the seat. According to her the compartment is unreserved and she wanted to sit comfortably. The girl was also wanted to take up much of the space as she felt she was the first to occupy the berth. Now, the lady got irritated and she slapped the girl and started shouting at her. The girl's mom who was sitting in the lower berth didn't open her mouth even though the lady had slapped her daughter. I felt it was the mistake of both and the mom should have told her daughter not to push the lady away with her legs. But though lot of chaos was going on there was no response from her mom. The lady kept bad mouthing the girl till she got down from the train. And people were just enjoying. The mom and the girls father ( after the lady left) didn't correct the girl instead they said -" cant that lady sit in the lower berth as it was not filled up when she arrived. Does she really have to climb and sit in the upper berth " and they kept blaming the lady that too after she left.

    It was really surprising. What do you guys feel about this sort of parenting - was it wrong from the parents side ? or was it the lady who was to blame?
     
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  2. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    Firstly,I really really hate the way the system is works.Even when I have traveled,I have noticed people trying to take seats though we have reserved it,the moment we leave it.

    this unreserved system sucks.
    anyways..no matter what..how dare the lady slap the girl! Yes it was not right to push the lady with her legs but she has absolutely no right to slap that girl.

    The mom could have kept quiet co of shock or she is a very very soft spoken person but she should have spoken up no matter what.

    Public is absolutely wrong too...

    both were wrong but the public and the lady who slapped are very much wrong.
    i am fuming just reading about it.

    Also,this has nothing to do with parenting but I would blame the parent of that lady(the one
    Who hit the girl) who raised such a nasty daughter.I have also met older ladies who are terribly nasty and felt they were waste of human space..

    The lady is a frustrated horrible person and can’t get over that she slapped a girl
     
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2020
  3. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    All the adults in this situation are to blame.
    The woman cannot SLAP the kid.
    The parents should not allow someone to abuse their kid.
    The parents also need to teach the girl not to push elders.
    No one seems to have any ethics
     
  4. sandhya2020

    sandhya2020 Silver IL'ite

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    Here everyone is wrong including the girl for being so mannerless. Most disgusting group of persons in the compartment - but the worst part of it all is
    -how the lady SLAPPED the child, No one should physically abuse children.
    -PARENTS let someone slap their child.
    -the PUBLIC watched it and some stupids even enjoyed it .The adults watching without speaking - just shows they have all normalised slapping children.
    -Yes, girl was absolutely wrong what she was doing , and parents should teach manners . But heading emphasis should have been about slap, not about parenting mistakes. The slap thing is really quite shocking to me.
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2020
    Topaz49, anika987 and sbonigala like this.
  5. sbonigala

    sbonigala Platinum IL'ite

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    I feel we are rushing here to brand the girl as manner less and declaring it is a parenting mistake.
    It could be the case where the girl was unwell - periods or any such thing and genuinely was not in the best of her behaviour that day.
    Come on !! She's a 14 year old girl - not an adult ! Adult women are difficult when they are PMS`ing and we are judging a parenting style, child's manners etc etc with one single incident!

    Am more surprised at the audience's mistake of watching a young girl being slapped in public by a stranger and yet not doing anything about it.
     
  6. hermitcrab

    hermitcrab Platinum IL'ite

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    Only recently corporal punishment was banned in Indian schools, by law.

    I am against corporal punishment inflicted on children. I hate it

    The people are so wrong
     
  7. Topaz49

    Topaz49 Gold IL'ite

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    The woman does not have the RIGHT to slap someone's child. She could have talked to the girl and told her to stop pushing her with her legs and it is not nice. If that didn't work, she should have told the girl's parents. "The PUBLIC who watched it and some even enjoyed it" are WORSE than the lady.


    the PUBLIC watched it and some stupids even enjoyed it .


    the PUBLIC watched it and some stupids even enjoyed it .
     
  8. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Totally agreed. But the parents shouldn't have kept quiet. And how can someone sit in an upper berth? I am not getting the total context here. Isn't it difficult to sit in the upper berth and middle berth?
     
    Last edited: Feb 20, 2020
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  9. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Unfortunately, I have been party to many such incidents, where people have indulged in slapping business knowing it was totally wrong. I read somewhere that it is human tendency to indulge in atrocities, that people are likely to be more short tempered, if they know they can get away with anything. Sometimes it boils my blood, but the situation is such that one can't do much. Just wait for nature to take its course with such people.
     
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  10. heron

    heron Platinum IL'ite

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    So, while there is a movie made about one slap ( Thappad)... there is a 'slap'ception going on in public casually.
    So, its human tendency to just slap if they can get away with it. The parents just watch instead of standing up for the child but comment after the lady has left. Insecure parents raising insecure kids; growing up to be hopeless humans ( who make up the crowd again thriving on other peoples misery).

    * slow claps*

    There are things one should not go about doing...like slapping random children. Now the 14 yr old has learnt that she only needs to be stronger and older than other person for her to enjoy the slapping series.

    These people are making slapping, being slapped and watching being slapped as casual incident.

    14 aint that young, there are bullies with serious insecurities at 14 who ruin other kids childhoods.
     
    Last edited: Feb 20, 2020
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