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Not Liking My Husband Amymore

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Renu6587, Oct 14, 2016.

  1. Renu6587

    Renu6587 New IL'ite

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    Hi
    i got married to my colleague 3 years before. i am only daughter to my parents and they were searching for a guy for long time but finally this guy proposed me and v informed our parents and got married.
    his mom has made a big scene during a custom after marriage. my parents came for that function and she was arguing so much that my husband shud not go to send off them in Railwaystation. at that time my husband did not talk even a single word which made me very angry and i started speaking and somehow he came to send off them. on that i need to travel to chennai and he shud got to hyderabad. his aunties were there who were in chennai only, they did not wait for me and i went to chennai alone from his place (100kms away from chennai).they did not bother abt me.
    then after some days i shifted to hyderabad,initially it was fine but gradually many controversies began between us right from sharing household works. he s telling he loves me but if i want anything he ll not get me and i hv to beg him several times and finally my dad ll get it for me as they were with us at that time since i was pregnant. he wont spend time with me at all and always he will be with mobile. he wont take me out until and unless i ask. he started a business(network marketing) and works for that during weekends also. he has never asked me if i need anything. i use to do online shopping only. no compliments nothing. v use to fight a lot for all the things his parents had made to me and my parents. life was goin lik this and eventhough we were fighting i still trusted him and he allowed me to look after my parents so i was very grateful to him. when he was lik this his mom expecttaion s lik i shud do everythin for him. i am also working and i am equally tired when i reach home. how can they expect lik that.
    my dad has not done anything for my goodness. he has not even bought me a pen. he was doing fianance only and that also he lost so much and without me and my mom knowing sold some all our assets.two months back we came to know that my dad got kidney failure and i became so down because of 2 things one abt his illness and second is money for traetment.
    during this situation i came to know abt my husband's 4.25 lakhs investment in network marketing which was done last year march and i came to know only this September. after that incident i am not liking him at all. and during that incident i shouted lik hell because i hv been thru this kind of situation because of my dad. i thought he wont be lik that but when he also did the same i was totally broken and his parents were consoling us and when i came form office that evening everything was normal but not me. again i got angry next morning i was not able control my anger and shouted lik hell and his parents told lik "he got debts he ll pay he s not asking money from you rite then wats ur problem" i got very much pissed off and i pushed my mother in law.thank god nothing happened to her. i know wat i did was wrong and after some time i asked sorry to her.we went to counsellor also. but am not having peace of mind at all beacuse i have made all these sins by shouting at my inlaws and hatred towrds them due to him only. if i would not have married him it shud not hv happened.
    Now he s telling he ll take care of me well, but i am not totally able to accept him. sometimes am fine when my inlaws are not around. sometimes thinking abt past and getting angry.
    Please advice me how to cope up with life
     
    Last edited: Oct 14, 2016
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  2. dia3

    dia3 Silver IL'ite

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    I will be straight forward- sometimes counselors want to say something but they sugar coat and say it as they don't want to lose their patient....But In straight forward wording- both of you are immature and need to grow up !!!..My sis in laws are highly earning and ivy league educated in US but if they pushed their mother in law physically, no one is going to tolerate it --not even my brothers- real n cousins...there is no space for physical abuse -slightest or more from any side or towards any side ( SIL/ DIL or MIL)...Give respect and take respect...Act maturely as I am assuming u must be 18 plus..everyone after 18 is a GROWN UP ADULT !
     
  3. dia3

    dia3 Silver IL'ite

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    I will be straight forward- sometimes counselors want to say something but they sugar coat and say it as they don't want to lose their patient....But In straight forward wording- both of you are immature and need to grow up !!!..My sis in laws are highly earning and ivy league educated in US but if they pushed their mother in law physically, no one is going to tolerate it --not even my brothers- real n cousins...there is no space for physical abuse -slightest or more from any side or towards any side ( SIL/ DIL or MIL)...Give respect and take respect...Act maturely as I am assuming u must be 18 plus..everyone after 18 is a GROWN UP ADULT so act like one !
     
  4. Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

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    Go through forum post and try to learn how to do things more with more tact.Use sweet words instead of fighting and pushing.
     
  5. sgandiva

    sgandiva Senior IL'ite

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    your words show your maturity levels :)
    Believe me, these are really small things, you need not worry about them. Every family has problems dear, try to understand people and situations. I think you have got a good husband and in laws, don't spoil your relation with him, protect it before it fails.
     

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