Need help to overcome depression and loneliness

Hi maddy, I wish to do all of what you said.. But kids never let me go anywhere.. Of course who will want to be in the house alone.. they also want to be outside.. But since they are little, my daughter gets bored easily, she takes her dad.. even if you take her to the most wonderful place, after few minutes she will lose interest and ask me "what do we do here", "I am bored ".. Even inside the house, its the same question.. My son will get cranky and will ask me to buy every single toy in the grocery store or any store.. He will throw a fit if i don't.. How will you manage a kid who cries to buy a toy in a temple.. Kids won't let me step out of the house without them.. So no zumba or dance or any class.. Husband is short tempered and I am scared to leave the kids alone with him as he may end up hitting them.. Yes i do go to a gym during lunch hours.. Dh will accompany us everywhere as he doesn't have any friends here.. But he will lose his temper if kids throw a fit..

I thought I would bring in a change to the family, by going out to movies with kids and dh.. To my dismay, my kids cried like hell and they wanted to come out of the theater.. They don't like to watch Indian movies, for some reason they call it bored.. My daughter doesn't like to watch even the english movies/cartoon movies in theater (cartoon movies).. After 10 minutes, she would want to go out.. Dh will be upset and he said he will never come to movies with kids as its disturbing to others too..

Another weekend I tried going to a mall with all of them.. Son wanted to go to every store and buy a toy, he throwed a fit , then we have to get back.. I guess kids carry some of the traits of DH, especially my daughter.. My DH won't wait if the hotel is too crowded.. He would simply drive to another hotel..

I wonder how to spend weekends and keep the kids happy.. Dh doesn't talk, no friends or no parties, no one comes home, he does talk well at office but doesn't like to bring them home or involve them with family. The house is so boring and my daughter started calling it a dead house.. lol..

To top all this tension, DH doesn't talk a word and even listening to me is hard for him.. Even if the kids are sleeping and we both are alone in the morning, he wouldn't initiate a single conversation.. He will be with his laptop reading news and fb updates.. If its a FB video (some movie or silly news) that his friend shared, He would reduce the volume and listen to it.. He simply doesn't want to tell me about it or doesn't like to share anything with me.

When I googled, I found something on "DAting yourself to come out of depression" I thought I will get more ideas here.

Some one here said "taking people for granted", I guess that is waht he is doing, because he knows for sure I won't leave him irrespective of he talks or not.. If he sees his office colleague or friend on the road, he would enquire about their health, say thanks and talk about cricket or news.. If i talk about news, he would keep mum..

I already feel like living alone.. That pushes me into depression.. I wonder how I changed like this, feeling bored even to call and wish my siblings for their bday.. Its so hard to take when a spouse doesn't talk or appreciate or gives gifts..I wonder how he acted so lovey dovey during initial years and how he changed now..

I have even asked him whether he is going to lose money or something if he talks to me..

 

Sorry to know your situation Hiral.. I don't understand Hindi so I don't know what you have written.. I am sure ILs will have more ideas for you..

 

Thank you so much.. I seriously don't want to ask what is his dream and aim in life and I am not interested too to know about it. I don't want to run behind him all the time and ask him questions or please him.. I am irritated and I feel cheated, because he used to talk so much before and he purposefully doesn't because his ego hurts him to talk, because I am his wife.. If I were his girl friend or colleague, the situation would be different. I guess its purely his attitude, the typical Indian type , where men are looked down when they are nice and loving to the wife.. Yes, I have asked questions "Which movie is good, did you see that news on something" for which he will say "No and keep quiet".. I can see him talking to his mom about movies and even to his friends..