My Wife Doesn't Want To Live With My Family Anymore. I'm So Depressed.

If you are older than 20 years .please stay separate . Parents need their space and your wife needs her space. Find a maid to help your mom . Let your parents relax, Staying separately will help you and your wife be independent and make your own decisions and lead a family.Be there for your parents when they really need you.But otherwise adult men and woman should build their own home and stay separate.

 

I have constructed a questionnaire based on what you have written please try to answer it truthfully so that everyone can provide you with the right information to fix your problem

"It's just a year to my marriage and my wife don't want to stay with my Mom and Dad anymore. My parents are old. Specially my dad is 65+"

(Pick one)

My wife should leave her parents and live with me and my parents because

• She is a woman.
• All women should leave their parents and live with their husband and his parents.
• A mans parents are more important than a women’s parents
• All of the above

"Atleast once a day my wife or my mother complaint about each other to me for different problems. I somehow manage to solve it every time and always makes both of them laugh."

Why don’t you go and live with your wife’s family if you and your wife’s parents has any problem she will solve it and make you laugh.

"But few days ago it went so bad on sunday when my wife started debating with my mother on house work. My mom was working from morning 6 am that day, my wife woke at 11 am and asking me let's go outside after her tea.
I immediately ask my wife to help mom and then we will go outside."

(Pick one)

I will not do any house work because

• I am a man
• Only women should do house work
• If a woman has a full time job she has to do house work no matter what.
• I can not do house work because I like to watch TV
• All of the above

"Because of that I slapped her hand too. It was first time I slapped her, there was a reasons behind it.
I really got very mad on her and almost went to slap her but I didn't and leave that place. "

(Pick one)

• I can not control my anger.
• All man can hit their wife.
• A man can hit his wife if he has a reason.
• All of the above

"She said If you want to live with me then take a rented room nearby, give everything my father gave in wedding and shift with me."

(Pick one)

• A man should get lot of gifts from the wife’s family when he gets married.
• All men should get dowry.
• All women’s parents should give dowry
• All of the above

 

I don't agree with 24 being too young. Its not like you got up from cradle and married. I was 23 when I got married. Age doesn't count for maturity. Its the attitude . If you are a neandrathal by mentality even being 30 wont change it. OP here is only thinking my parents, my age , wife didn't help.Where does being married and being responsible come in the picture here..

Don't tell me we don't hear similar tales from people who married later than this age. This problem exists even if both are in 30's.

 

OP...you are ready to end life but worry how your mother will live without you if you move out.Seriously?????You can't be that silly.

Secondly...why are you guys so eager to turn your parents into helpless old dependent people.
Your mother is still working .Your dad is in his mid sixties.They are relatively young.

You are lucky your in laws stay close by. You can take a house close by so that you both can be close to both parents and in laws .
You can together be around for both sets of parents while having your privacy and your own nest where you both can live the way you want.
May be if you try to be a bit caring towards the parents who raised her too,she will be more inclined to be around your parents too.

Buy some sweets and flowers for her and her mother. Give a hug to her father in front of her. Treat them the way you want her to treat your parents.It is not easy to cut out parents of a husband if the husband treats the wife's parents really well. Women will go the extra distance for the husband who treats her parents well.

 

She saying we will take home nearby, don't break any relation with your parents. You can visit to them anytime. We will visit on festival time and all....
what could be the best solution than this?
But still I'm still thinking about my parents... How will my mother will live without me...
How your wife's mother living now.. just like that..
She cried so much when I told her about my wife's decision.
A painful decision may hurt now, definitely it will give better life than now
I'm too emotional to leave my family.
Its better to get hurt one time than regular basis

 

She is going to be like this until you move out. She is not happy staying there. Why can't she make her own tiffin, why she need to get from her mother. You wanted the ladies to live under the same roof so bad, now deal with it. She wants to separate and you guys should as she will make it very difficult to live there.

 

Pls get a separate place. While keeping parents happy you forget to live your life and have a peaceful happy life with your wife. If parents are healthy please stay seperate

 

Your wife is seriously set on having separate home. Based on her behavior you described after coming back from her parents home, it's unlikely she will change her mind. Better to move out so that everyone is at peace.