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My son's birthday

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by sudhara, Mar 2, 2010.

  1. sudhara

    sudhara New IL'ite

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    Hi all,
    How many of have wondered about ways to celebrate you kids' birthdays. Or how many of you have felt it's waste of time and have failed to see it from a child's perspective. let me share my experience and what made me make such celebrations a regular in our home.
    I come from an orthodox and more so a conservative family where they feel even attending birthday parties is a waste of time. But things changed once my bro got married and my SIL started throwing party for every small occasion. so cutting cake, decorating our home etc, became a norm in our household when there is a function. The maiden venture was during the sashtiabdapoorthi of my dad. from then on, I took over and whenever there are birthdays or anniversaries I quietly call my florists and order for a bouquet along with a box of cake. we all slowly got attuned to this new culture brought in by my Bhabhi. But again we rolled back these new customs for a while (for reason unknown to us).
    It again croppedup when we threw a grand bash when my son turned one but then the next two years came and went unnoticed. I used to discuss with my mom that It;s sheer waste of time and money when that comes to brithday parties. with everyone in the house employed who has time for such functions? this was going on till the day when My son started pestering me to throw a party for his fourth birthday. though i wanna pursue it, I felt hesitant (thanks for the coservativ ebackground in which i was brought up). I kept saying let's see. I was trying to get away without doing any thing. How mean i am? The day was drawing close and I was not doing any preparation to hold a party or buying return gifts. My son was curious to know whether I am going to hold a party. as usual i said let's see. he got cheesed off and said why ma you guys ask me to attend my friends' brithdays parties but when that comes to mine why shouldn't I? the question that made me think and arrange for a party was (let me put it verbatim to get the real hang of it): Naan mattum friendsoda birthday na ava veetla poi sapidaren ana naan en birthdaykku yaariuim invite panni sappadu kuduka koodatha? ennakku asingama irukku chumma poi sapidarathuku. nee avala en birthdaykku invite pannuvennaka inime naan poren else i won't go.
    These words from my lil one made me think again and again and I felt really ashamed to be so workaholic and not trying to undestand how embarrasing he would have felt. So we decided to throw a bash when he turned four and we have decided to make it a regular affair.
    share your experiences regarding this. and what interests kids when that comes to gifts or return gifts. coz' i had real tough time choosing some during my son's birthday party.
    cheers
    sudhara
     
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  2. lavii

    lavii Gold IL'ite

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    i will be 26 tommorow and till last year my parents celebrated my Brthday
    there are people who celebrate it by donating poor some food and clothes while some others throw a grand party and celebrate and some poeple wont at all
    i always felt happy being a part of a party and atlast in this busy world you have few hours to spend with everyone you love around you
    unfortunatley this year i wont be doing much as i lost my dad last year and my mom is out of town and my dh never bothers about this celebration stuff
    i guess you did right thing by giving a parrty on your sons BD please continue this
     
  3. Tubelight

    Tubelight Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi !
    A nice thought provoking article.:thumbsup I'm glad you have decided to have parties for your kid every year.

    Birthday parties have become so common these days and kids getting exposed to them will naturally want a celebration for themselves too. Its perfectly legitimate for a child to want to invite friends home and serve them cakes and popcorn.
    I have also heard some people say, spending money on decorations, cakes and return gifts are waste of money . But Children are not going to be kids very long. Before we know it, they will be in their teens when they themselves will not want a cake + balloon party because is so childish ! So, I think there's no harm in indulging them for a few years with birthday bashes. Those jolly days will become part of the child's happy memories for a lifetime.

    Choosing return gifts is not very difficult these days. Most toy shops have separate sections for small inexpensive toys to put in lootbags. Stationary items like color pencils, crayons, fancy erasers, sticker sheets etc are always appreciated by kids of all age groups.
    :cheers
     
  4. Mindian

    Mindian IL Hall of Fame

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    hi sudhara,

    oh you MUST celebrate your sons birthday the way he wants it to.these days never come again and your son will always remember you satisfying his small desires.

    believe me for them food is not the main thing so you do not have to take a lot of trouble in that area..everything is readily available these days.....it is being the same as their peer group that matters.

    i still celebrate my dds birthday..and the way it has progressed from kids parties to now going to a movie or bowling alley with friends has only given me many happy memories.

    do take a family picture too every year...it will be a nice gift for him later.:) all the very best to your son.
     
  5. Mahajanpragati

    Mahajanpragati Platinum IL'ite

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    hi,
    i feel celebrating a B'Day is very important for little kids.this is a special day for which they wait mths in advance.with good planning one can make this day memorable for little ones & for us adults also.
    yes,giving doanations & feeding poors along with the traditional pooja is part of this celebration but for kids the big thing is celebrating by cutting cake & getting gifts.
    this is the way they realise that 'i am important or special'
    so one must celebrate this day
    pragati
     
  6. sudhara

    sudhara New IL'ite

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    Hi lavii,
    Thank you so much for your reply. And all the very best for the new one. Take care and be safe. Get all necessary details for the new mom-to-be to avoid 11th hour rush. take good care of yourself and the infant too. Do let me know about the name.
    all the best
    sudhara
     
  7. sudhara

    sudhara New IL'ite

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    HI,
    thanx for considering it a thought-provoking article. I was racking my brain as to how to handle it when that comes to birthdays. thank you for giving your piece of mind. I do see to it that I make it a regular affair.
    sudhara
     
  8. sudhara

    sudhara New IL'ite

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    Hi Mindian,
    It's really nice to receive many replies. Yes I do agree with you that these growing up years are different from their teen years. I will make it a point to celebrate my DS's birthday every year as long as I can.
    cheers
    sudhara
     
  9. sudhara

    sudhara New IL'ite

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    Hi pragati,
    It's too appreciating. Though feeding the poor or visiting the orphanage along with my son are in my agenda I hardly find time to organise those visits. I feel too bad to say that. let me try. All i need to know is time management. I shall try to fix it this year.
    thanx
    sudhara
     
  10. subbutr

    subbutr Senior IL'ite

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    Thanks to our Sudhara for the thought provoking topic & we must congratulate your son for his smart query to wake up parents from their world & see the realities.
    Yes, the modern kids are so fast & smart to bring those changes of yesteryear's. We have to encourage them through such small get together so that they do feel that we do care for them.
    Our belated birthday wishes to your son
    Subbu
     

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