My equation with SIL- husband's sister

Op, Nip this in the bud. You are on right track. Ignore what your hubby or in laws says about speaking everyday. Your SIL is a spoilt brat and taking out frustration of her SIL on you. You will set a tone for lifelong kissing up if you start doing it now. It wont stop from only calls. Slowly she will try to control everything in your life seeing how you succumbed to pressure to call her .

My SIL is many many yrs older than me. She was in similar stage. Only she rules everybody in my in laws and her in laws . She does what she wants always. But wanted to control our lives . I gave in when I was newly married. But the straw that broke the camel's back was when she tried to break my marriage and showed me in bad light to my hubby. I nipped it then and now we barely say hello.

If your SIL tries to walk out of your house. to make a scene . Let her. Don succumb . It will get old very soon.Good Luck.

 

sils are like this I guess. as mine is also somewhat same.
As she cannot rule her family she tries to do that here. some even more want to rule world. Do the things your way. soon it will be accepted. once you start walking their way they will expect nd force you to be like that which later will suffocate you. so do what you thnk is right.

 

Sometimes, we need to massage ego or do something we're not fully convinced of in order to save relationships. If this is the only issue and point of contention, then you can probably compromise for sometime. Your husband must have compromised on something to make things better

 

Never start compramising for sister in laws then you will end up in depression and mental stress..they will sit pn your head and will want to dance to her tunes..keep her away from your life ..

 

dear OP,

Dont make this mistake. Given the history you have detailed it is likely your h will forget everything about this incident except that she called you back. You have to point out the facts then and there in a matter of fact tone to drive home your point in a way that he also remembers. for eg, when she did not pick you should have said something to him for eg-- see I called and she didnt even pick up. And you fight with me about this so much. is this issue really worth so many arguments between you and me? ' or something like that. Same thing when she called back. You should point out she took her own time to call back in a calm resigned voice. Be consistent in pointing these out. It is not obvious to him.

 

i think op you are on right track...
just keep it up and dont let it down.....good going.

 

But that is good! It means he is also unable to defend them! A few instances of this and he will slowly, grudgingly questioning their behavior and start to see the matter from your POV. But initially be consistent. Look it is the way you say it also. Dont say it in a combative way. Just mention it in a very matter-of-fact tone. You were expecting this all along and you are not surprised. Say it but dont pause or wait for his reply, in fact, dont even look at him after saying it. Just continue directly into another topic after making the observation. For eg, 'see she didnt even pick up my call. Anyway, (sigh in a resigned way) do you want coffee? I am making some?' blah blah' etc, etc... Just continue seamlessly into a different discussion.