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My 8 Year Old Girl Child Shocked Me..

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by anika987, Jun 25, 2021.

  1. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    I am acting normal..

    I didnt want to talk like its a bad thing but mentioned it is very age inappropriate and not the topic at this point of her age.
     
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  2. nuss

    nuss Platinum IL'ite

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    I don’t think what she asked was age inappropriate. Her school is probably already teaching them these basics. She is almost 9, soon she will have her period. She is curious about the things around her. All kids are!
    My 6 year old talks matter of fact about mating in animals and understand Las at a minimum level that a male and female animal needs to be together or “mate” to get a bird egg or mammal baby.

    I use the exact name for body parts so they understand that there is nothing wrong about asking questions about body parts. My kids saw our neighbors horse other day and asked “what was the long arm under the belly”. I took the opportunity to explain that it wasn’t an arm, it was the penis. They understood.

    You can get some books or read articles about how to talk about sex and sexuality with kids. There are a lot of resources. Your pediatrician would be helpful too. Our pediatrician always ask them the question- “who is the in charge of your body and who can check your privates.”

    Please remember that your daughter is not you. She is growing up in a different time and different country. If you didn’t know about things that doesn’t mean she wouldn’t either.
     
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  3. NOW

    NOW Gold IL'ite

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    I agree that you cannot compare our times and upbringing in India with U.S or western societies and need to educate ourselves on how to deal with the questions and prepare for preteen years.
     
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  4. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    You are perhaps mixing up "how babies are made" with other aspects of sex such as physical satisfaction, the emotional ones, safe sex, how young is too young and so on. Your daughter is simply curious about how human babies are made. Address only that question or confirm the knowledge she has gathered from videos. Use actual terms such as penis and vagina. Treat it like you would treat the question, "why do women have bigger breasts than men?"
     
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  5. nuss

    nuss Platinum IL'ite

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    Totally agree with @Rihana! June is pride month. You can take her to a library or local museum and pretty much all places will have a pride celebration. These events make it easier to talk about straight, gay relationships with kids.
     
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  6. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    That animated video was talking about how men and women need to get together,body fluids,the word “sex” was spoken etc..I have no one to ask about this and I was very disturbed..I don’t know if it is right or wrong for an 8 year old to know about this..


    Also agreed with the fact that I cannot compare myself with this generation..
     
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  7. DDream

    DDream Finest Post Winner

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    My dd knows whats meant by ' mate'. She asked me, can our puppy mate with the female puppy, he met at the 'puppy training school' ( dog draining centre). I told her both are kids now and when they are adults they can, if they like each other. He can have his wife and kids. Looks like she was happy with my reply ( don't know whether thats the correct way ). Looks like she liked a particular female puppy there:)
    Next question was how can we know how our kittens are girls. So I explained it using correct words and related it to her. Anyway I have taught them what their private parts are and whats safe touch or bad touch etc even they were toddlers. I remind it once in a while.
    I think their schools introduce topics on this too. Their general knowledge is much better than I expected. They are curious about everything, so be ready for more questions.

    One positive is that she asked you that question. Be happy for that. I told my dd, we are best friends and I should be the first one to know her secrets. Not sure will that work well. But now we share little secrets and In this process, I give her the info I believe she should know. I am trying to create a comfort zone to share or ask any thing she likes.
    We cant compare us with them, they have a world of information at their finger tips. Atleast they are asking us, thats a positive aspect.

    Its very difficult to track every thing. But i make sure the electronic devices are kids friendly ( there are settings for it). Also, use a login id instead of a guest option, so that we can check history of their actvity if we need to.
     
    Last edited: Jun 27, 2021
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  8. Hopikrishnan

    Hopikrishnan Platinum IL'ite

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    @anika987
    When I saw John Oliver's talk about the Dillermand cartoon on Danish Television, I thought of this thread.... The Danes have made talking to kids about the various Taboo subjects so easy and fun.

    You need to see this and have a laugh:
     
  9. Roar

    Roar Gold IL'ite

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    Its a part of life and part of nature. Its better addressing it slowly and straight without making it sound not normal.

    There were (are?) girls in india who were told about sex a night before first night. I cant beleive that girls are expected to be naive until the night before and then ramp up straight to husband's Leone.

    At 21 I went to see elephant park in Coorg and I almost fainted seeing its fifth leg...How much ever we try to avoid, nature puts everything onto our faces so better to be ready and informed.
     

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