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My 8 Year Old Girl Child Shocked Me..

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by anika987, Jun 25, 2021.

  1. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    My dd plays a lot with neighborhood kids.
    I share a good relationshionwith her abd whe confides everything to me.

    Today she asked me abour something inappropriate for her age.I did not overreact and was calm but inwardly I am deeply
    Disturbed.

    It about “physical relationships“ and how children are made.Also she said something about gay and asked the meaning for it.


    I feel very upset.I thought i was a good mom giving the right kind of freedom and also keeping an eye on her.


    However..this has gone beyond my control.

    With so much exposure around and kids playing..don’t know how this happened and am upset.

    Sooner or later kids will learn about this..but an 8 and soon to be a 9 year old? She is so young..

    I don’t have anyone to turn to seek advice..

    What next..
     
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  2. AppuMom

    AppuMom Gold IL'ite

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    Be happy that she is asking these things to you :). My son used to google for all his questions and often ends up in inappropriate websites..This is quite natural that they have these questions.Be calm and answer with age appropriate words.We didnt have these doubts till we were teens.But these days kids come up with all these doubts even at young age.We watch all LGBT movies,series etc at home since my son knew about these things from grd 3 onwards.Their school used to have these topics discussed and had special clubs for higher grade kids.Its quite normal for this generation OP
     
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  3. chanchitra

    chanchitra Gold IL'ite

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    I would be happy that my daughter is asking me for this information.
     
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  4. Anusha2917

    Anusha2917 Finest Post Winner

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    Anika it's the right time for you to teach the girl about gay/lesbian relationship and boy girl relationship. Starting sex education as early as when babies are 6 years is not harmful at all. Be open and teach her what it means with an explanation appropriate for her age. Without revealing too much details you should cease this opportunity to educate(sex education) the girl.
    So good she's reaching out to her mumma..

    They'll figure out eventually - that's what we did. But I wish my parents had educated me instead of hushing up my questions when I was curious. :)
    Good luck, don't be upset.
     
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  5. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    At school one day or the other kid will discuss with other kids. From one knowledgeable kid, it spreads like wildfire to other kids in the class and then spread to entire school and then the parents. There is nothing to be bewildered about it.
    When I make this statement, I hope every parent would vouch safe for it. In Tamil இலை மறைவு காய் மறைவு is the phrase.

    You got to deal tactfully with your rightfully inquisitive daughter and say things in degrees by and by. She would be benefitted!
    Thanks and Regards.
     
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  6. Roar

    Roar Gold IL'ite

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    Hi Anika,
    Its basic curiousness!. All people have it. She just wants to know about things that she dosnt know :). Dont link it to your upbringing, being curious about body in this age isnt something to be embarassed or be shameful about.
    Tell her the truth in a subtle way, there are many links on youtube how to do it with children. My daughter is going to be 8 and I am expecting these questions in 1-2yrs ( I would be worried if she chooses to discuss it with some stranger online when she is 10+!).
     
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  7. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    Thank you guys..

    however..on further questioning she mentioned that she saw some YouTube video (some kids animation) about how babies are made .

    I searched for that video..some sadist pervert had made kids cartoon videos and explained everything about how it happens..

    Now she knows everything i feel and i dont know how to react..

    I feel like my child has been emotionally abused..tough to digest.

    These adult topics i knew only when I was
    17..


    Usually am very careful about what she watches and dont know how this happened without my knowledge..

    I feel guilty..how to do damage control..:(
     
  8. Tamrakshar

    Tamrakshar Gold IL'ite

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    Anika, I have a daughter exactly of the same age as your daughter, and my problem is almost similar. She is very curious, and she sometimes asks very uncomfortable questions. For example, a couple of days back, she asked,

    "Dad, do animals marry?"

    "No, why?" I replied.

    "Then how do they produce babies?"

    That was her innocuous question to me, but I was caught off guard.

    A few months back she also searched "male and female body" in You Tube. Since then we have been keeping a close eye on her online activities. But, you are right, it's not always possible to track activities, as moms have other important works to do. So, it's beter to put the search engine and You Tube in safe mode, or put some Net Nanny kind of software. But again you are correct, nothing is full proof.

    However, I don't think any damage is done by watching a video. As long as you don't give undue importance to the issue, which will make her even more curious, and make sure she does not do it again, it will have no impact on her.
     
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  9. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    I dont know how to say this..she used the 3 letter word starting s..

    Very stressed today and upset..
     
  10. Tamrakshar

    Tamrakshar Gold IL'ite

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    No doubt, very shocking. But, if you rebuke her too much on this issue, she would get more interested in the topic.
     
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