My 3 year old not mingling with other children and very adamant

manjumnair · Aug 2, 2007

Hello,

My 3 year old daughter, does not mingle with other children. Whenever she see a child of her age or an younger one, she screams and sometimes demand us to carry her, so that the other child will not touch her... I am sending her to play school now...but there also she is a loner...she will play alone... she tells me she does not like children...

She has not much problem with elders even though she is very selective about whom to mingle with...

Do any of you have a similar experience? I am a bit upset about her screaming habit also... She is very adamant and demanding... If she did not get what she wants, she screams a lot for sometime, then go for crying and start beating and pinching us.... Any solution to this problem...

Regards
Manju

sukar2703 · Oct 2, 2007

dear manju,
i too have a the same problem.

My son is 3 years old and started play school 15 days back, though am seeing welcome change in him, with regards to kids, he is still not mingling much. A kind of okay with elders, atleast replies them, gets friendly with maids and the ayah in the school. But does not play with any other children, plays with himself. Even if any other kid comes home, he minds his own business. But when we are at home, he always plays with me and my husband and quite interactive also.

Is there any big problem or is it a matter of concern?:? Any experienced mom there to enlighten us on this...........

Thanks in advance
subha:wave

subbutr · Oct 2, 2007

Dear Manjumnair and subha,

The kids at tender age are yet to accustom with mingling with others due to the fact that their exposture to other kids are minimum.
once we encourage them to play with others ( say with our neighbours kids, taking them to park and let them watch the other kids play, guide them by encouragements to play with them makes the difference.)
As the present society where there are less number of kids within family and also not residing in joint families makes the kids feel isolated.
when the kid start attending play schools and with a well co-operative tutors, they will automatically found their interest to move with other childrens.
At home we have to engage them by listening and should not force them with harsh words will make them feel at home.

Subbu

sukar2703 · Oct 2, 2007

Thanks for your immediate response.

We will continue to encourage him to play with others and hope he will be fine soon.

Bye
Subha:wave

manjumnair · Oct 2, 2007

Dear Subha and Subbu Sir,

Subbu Sir, Thanks for the kind advice you have given us. My daughter is still adamant even after going to play school. She likes some people and mingles easily with them, but with some people she is very uncomfortable. It happens for elders also.

Her teacher at the Play school was telling me the other day about a positive change in my daughter. She started mingling with other kids. She is going to that school for 2 months now. And have learned a lot of things. Also, now she wants to go to school even on Saturdays and Sundays. I think she likes her school atmosphere.

She eats whatever she takes to school in her snack box. At home it is difficult to make her eat. She recites rhymes and identifies all the English alphabets, even if we show her the letters in random. Also, she know the numbers from 1 to 50. All this have come only after she started going to this school.

She now know many of her friend's names and is ready to go to school because they are waiting for her in the school. Last week, when I went to pick her from the school in the afternoon, I saw her speaking with one of the other kids very happily.

We went to our native last month and she didn't like my cousin's daughter who is 2 years when we visited them previously. But this time, my daughter did not want to leave her and come. All our relatives are telling about her change. I feel so happy now that she is mingling with other kids and started liking their company.

I am now positive about a change in her adamant character also. I am sure she will change with time.

Subha, I think your son will also change after some more time in school. He also will like the company of other kids. Talk to your child's tutor at school and tell her your problem. They can help you in this. That's my experience. My daughter's teacher is very understanding.

yenetishashi · Oct 2, 2007

hi to all you ladies!
my daughter who is 3 yrs old started going to internatonal school from yesterday .
she is enjoying to go to school. previously she used to go to fiinnish play school near by to our home and now far away .
today was photo session in their school and she wore traditional dress (pattu lehenga and blouse)and then changed it .she mingles with every one and now a days she njoys coloring pictures and painting.
on 30th there was food festival here and i participated in it with all indus ladies inspiration and prepared 150 kaaja,200 idli with chutney and sambar, 3kilos mixture and 3kilos of tamarind rice with raita. 50% of the collection goes charity for people in India. i felt very happy that almost all items were sold out and people likes them very much. if anyone of you wants any recipie, i can help you .
bye shashi