Monster SIL is back

Hey ras,

i know how irritated you must be feeling...and yes i completely agree that seat is your right!...but you could either ignore it since she is there only for a few days...If you fear that this might become a habit you could hasten and sit in the front seat befoe they have an opportunity to declare the seat is theirs...in case you have already occupied your preffered seat and your SIL starts ranting, perhaps you could tell her in a 'funny tone' ohh im too tired to change seats now..then you could pacify her telling we are almost there!! or something like that..if inspite of this she cries and creates a drama, ignore her

Even tthough this is a trivial issue this just goes to prove that your SIL definitely doesn't seem sensible or sensitive or mature enough

 

Tell you SIL that for so many days (no. of yrs.) you have been sitting in the front seat, now let me sit in the front with my husband for the same amount of years. Be a darling, sweetie. Everywhere the wives sit with their husbands. Let me sit with him.

Be straight. She will cry and make at DRAMA, so what, she will not repeat her behaviour. Sometimes, you should allow people to cry. They come back to normal, after they are through with their tears. Letting them have their way altimes, means, you will never get your way.

 

Ras when all are seated in the car tell your DH... can we pls buy an ambasador & sell off this one..... when he asks why then tell him it has a continuous seat in the front and then 3 of you can sit together in the front seat !!!

 

are these drives long ones or just regular ones to shops etc? I realise it really irritates you taht your SIL is sitting in front, but honestly is it worth all the hungamas? You have let your DH know that its irritating to you.. But maybe you should pick up otehr issues that are more pressing between your SIL and you. Just this incident alone doesnt warrant you to come down to her level..does it?
From your SIL view, she might eb feeling, you are always with your DH, so when shes visiting, why not sit with him.. and you know shes a drama queen.. So for the peace between you and DH , maybe you should ignore it.. Do you really feel sitting in that front seat by your SIL makes the relationship between you and your DH less important?
My aunt whenever she used to visit us , used to sit with my dad in front.. it never felt as an issue because there were no other underlying problems there..it was just those few days when she was there and in no way did that undermine my mums place in her own home or car . She was just proud of being next to her baby brother in his car. my uncle passed away ages ago, so no car there..

But i really feel you being so much angry at SIL for this car issue is because of other issues...

 

Dear Ras,

If it is bothering you so much, then be the first to take the front seat and tell her I will be sitting with my husband or if you are the last one to come keep standing out and tell her I will sit with my husband, if other tell you that you sit behind tell them you would rather not go. She will cry once and there will be a huge show in the family but after that she will always sit behind.

Sometimes you yourself will have to throw some tantrums to make people see what they are doing. If she comes for a real short visit, then you might just let it go. But if this is really really bothering then take action.

Hope it helps.

 

Hey Ras!

everyone has given good suggestions for your issue here.. I was lil confused - your SIL stays with you or she comes every 15 days? If she stays with you, just make a big issue out of it and clear it once and for all with DH.. the result shud be only you have the right to sit next to your hubby. If she comes once in 15 days, then too be firm on your stand but you could ignore once in a while / as someone rightly suggested here-- Dont step into the car and u might say " I would give bro-sis some space so they can hang out together" eventually DH wud get embarassed and would be in a fix when such situation arise (I mean DH shud have some uneasiness with the situation as you are feeling hurt too! )