1. Would you like to join the IL team? See open jobs!
    Dismiss Notice
  2. What can you teach someone online? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice
  3. If someone taught you via skype, what would you want to learn? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice

Mix Santa - Banta jokes

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by chatkara_tasty, Apr 5, 2007.

  1. chatkara_tasty

    chatkara_tasty Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    271
    Likes Received:
    48
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Gender:
    Female
    <TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=2 width="100%" border=0><TD style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; FONT-SIZE: 12pt; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; PADDING-TOP: 0px" vAlign=top width="100%">





    Titanic was sinking.

    An Englishman asked Santa, "How far is land"?
    Santa: 2 KMs.


    Englishman jumped into sea.
    Englishman: Now, which direction?

    Santa: Downwards !


    **********

    Two days of powercut in Delhi had made life miserable. Worst affected was Delhi Metro station where families of Santa & Banta were struck for 48 hrs on escalators.


    **********


    How did Santa tried to kill a bird??


    He took it to the top of a building and dropped it from there to die.


    *********

    Santa: I have swallowed a Kay.

    Doctor: When?

    Santa: 3 months back!

    Doctor: What were you doing till now?

    Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.


    *********

    Santa was drawing money from ATM. Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I've seen ur password. It's ****. Santa: U r wrong. It's 1394.


    *********

    Santa falls in love with a nurse... After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her: "I luv u sister ."


    *********

    Santa asked Banta: Why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in evening?

    Banta: Very simple, because he is PM not AM.


    *********

    Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller?

    Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl .


    *********

    A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.

    Santa doesn't turns up for 4 days.

    Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.

    *********


    Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatos 5 days ago, he hasn't came back yet!

    Santa: Why don't u cook something else? .



    **********

    An Englishman and Santa inside the toilet.

    Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?

    Santa: Good evening, we open the zip and do!


    ***********

    Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one customer went there. You know why?

    Because he opened petrol pump on second floor..


    ***********

    Ultimate answer while changing the job.

    Interviewer: Why did you changed your last job?

    Santa: Because the company shifted and didn't tell me where.


    ************

    Santa and Banta went for a drive.

    Santa: Hey, look out from the window, are the indicators working or not?

    Banta puts his head out & says "Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No!!!"


    ************

    Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying furiously...

    Finally, Santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again.


    ************

    Why did Santa keep the door open while bathing?

    Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.


    ************

    Santa phoned his wife: I am not coming home . The steering, dash board, gears of car have been stolen.

    After sometime he calls again: I am coming , earlier I sat on the back seat.
     
    Loading...

    Similar Threads
    1. saraswathi1410
      Replies:
      0
      Views:
      654
    2. sharathd
      Replies:
      2
      Views:
      847
    3. lavii
      Replies:
      1
      Views:
      816
  2. mohana

    mohana Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    658
    Likes Received:
    66
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Gender:
    Female
    ha,,ha,,thanks Henna for posting.
     
  3. vivbass

    vivbass Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,063
    Likes Received:
    58
    Trophy Points:
    105
    Gender:
    Female
    :rotfl:rotflsuperb heena:2thumbsup:
     
  4. chatkara_tasty

    chatkara_tasty Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    271
    Likes Received:
    48
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Gender:
    Female
  5. laylaa

    laylaa New IL'ite

    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    Gender:
    Female
    :rotfl :rotfl :rotfl nice jokes heena.
     

Share This Page