Middle School In Usa !!??

EagerForInfo · Feb 8, 2024

Hello ,
My daughter who used to be the sweetest girl ever has suddenly become moody and mean and impolite in her behavior. She recently started middle school. Also she is addicted to the iPad sneaking it in the bedroom at night and what not. Discord seems to be her favorite website. She is also hiding her Apple Watch which we bought for her us to communicate with her so we don’t read her chats.
I did get a chance to sneak in her chats and she has been talking to a boy calling him my love !
Am I overreacting?? In a really short duration I’m seeing RAPID changes in a bad way.

Is this a normal change once kids start middle school in the US? I’m scared seeing her lie to me and mock her brother.

I am contemplating going back to india immediately this year and get her to continue her studies there? Please advise.

chanchitra · Feb 10, 2024

talk to her about consequences of dating in high school and responsibilities that come with it. Thats one thing every 1st generation immigrant parent should learn and imbibe. We cannot stop them from having feelings but we definitely can channel them in the right direction. Dating is fine as far as the kids grades and their other activities are not taking a back seat.
Rather than confronting :- Talk and let her know the pros and cons of dating and that he should respect boundaries. Teen pregnancies and precautions should be an important conversation in every household with teenagers. We all had crushes while growing up. No kid of ours will go for an arranged marriage. So as parents we need to make the changes in our thought process.

Nevertheless, till the kids are dependent, we are the parents, so we get to decide the rules if we realize that the kids are getting distracted. Dating is perfectly healthy when they are mature enough to understand the consequences but it should never compromise academics.
Communication is the key.

Also since you have been having marital problems for a long time. Maybe it's her way to find some peace for herself.
Education system in India is very different from US. Kids have a tough time adjusting.
Be her friend and get her on your side.

sanjuruby3 · Apr 30, 2025

my daughter will be in middle and already doing somewhat similar from last year. Sneaking tablet going here to there.She start chatting early this year and she and her friends group was always on calls that way.
As soon as she wd come from her, she wd be on call for 1 hr, then again and again and wd keep planning play dates so
ultimately we had to get rid of chat/messager.

She throws drama, emotions, trickeries, meanness, rude, talking back, everything. I also hear, we can not expect much from this generation. By high school they are all ready.