Mentally Drained And Feeling Weak And Lonely In Life

Hi dear
I totally understand ur frustration. I used to live with 2 pairs of inlaws. My original inlaws n husband's dads dad n mom too alongwith husbands sister. Initially i was totally out of control to how to handle 2 mother in laws but as time passed sister in law got married n now great father in law died recently. Mine is a love marriage still i know how possessive my husband is towards his parents. Actually i also love them alot they r quite helpful but on many issues we hav different opinions.
Sitting in front of car was never a issue because i took it as mandatory that when we all are traveling father in law will sit in front seat. When we r alone traveling i sit beside him.
I used to do part time job but due to my fertility treatment i left it for 2 yrs but i think going out of home for sometime seriously improves ur perception toward problems. I am married for almost 9 yrs now still with no baby but now i am thinking of joining same job again.
I also did one meditation program of Sadhguru inner engineering alongwith my husband so now we both can handle this family pressure.
I advise for u is to do a meditation course it will tell you that beyond all this there r sk many things in life.
Wish u all d best. N always remember inlaws r never problematic only d way we think can make big difference

 

ufff this power battle is a big thing really..if i were yiu i would have stopped going out with these people..your husband should have the desire to sit next to you in car and you should be upfront and say him thats ur seat..if not letting it go is your only solution.

 

There was never a better piece of advice than this i feel, in all situations. But, the pity is that when it comes to relationships especially in a marriage, it becomes extremely difficult to do either- getting over or walking away. The best we can do is to choose an alternative that is not self destructive and at the same time would gel with others.

 

Sorry to interrupt this post..me also sailing in same situation..I m married for 4 years... we are living together for past 1 year only , to pursue master degree we lived in diff cities..in the past 4 year of my marriage life my husband bought me 3 dress n one watch that's it...no gift for my birthday or our weddingwday..his mother bought some diamonds for her n his sister , my husband told me that he will buy me diamond earring for me later...then after 6 month we webt ro shop during billing he gave a gold chain for exchange that was given by my father during our wedding...he doesn't spend single rupee for that earring. I was devastated with it..his mother knows that he was going to exchange that gold chain but I don't have any clue..he himself said that his mother was very important to him than anyone in the world...if me n his mother say any ideas , he choose his mother s only...I kept him first in my life then only my kid n parents will come..whether I m expecting too much that I should be his priority... I m feeling my love was being ignored n crushed..

 

either fight for the love or ignore.

 

@mirrorimage and @Ishaan10

The real struggle in life begins with marriage; a man-made relationship sealed by the laws of the society. At every stage, there will be a battle with all the concerned parties and this relationship hurts the most because of the nature of bonding. All I can say from my experience is that this struggle is like a bubble gum; sweet taste disappears before we realise its value, no amount of chewing dissolves it and overstretching breaks it creating a mess. Most often spitting is not an option either.

As @Naari, @DDream and some others suggested, use your education to get financial independence and try to be more diplomatic. Focus more on yourself and your relationship with your spouse. Rest of the things will slowly settle down or fade into the background. Even couples who have celebrated silver and golden jubilees continue to grumble, shadow box and compromise. This is nature.

Rarely do we find couples who know their clear limits and also know how to cherish and nurture their relationship. Kudos to them and best of luck to the rest.