1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

Ladies Party

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by paru123, Mar 3, 2024.

  1. paru123

    paru123 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    427
    Likes Received:
    393
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Feeling not so good about myself in understanding people.

    We had lot of cultural activities and parties in our society ladies group in the month of January/Feb. Though I have least interest in dancing I too went along and been a part of their programs and also games and party get togethers as I didnt want to feel left out . I was feeling good in their company with so much jokes, laughter and timepass.
    Now after all this programs got over, recently they organized a small Birthday party of one lady. Few ladies were seen attending it and some including myself were not invited. Had they not posted pics, i would not have known about the party. I expressed my unhappiness over not inviting and for that 2 ladies personally gave big explanation for keeping it small. I told them they could have avoided posting pics and for that one lady said they wanted to show that they organised a party for their friend.

    Analysing the whole episodes, I get the feeling of being used by them. Its like they don't care about the feelings of others. Now next they are planning for womens day party and a picnic afterwards. Would you join them if you were in this situation. I appreciate their enthusiasm in conducting such parties, but when not included I feel so left out. When they want to reduce the cost per head, they would invite everyone.
     
    Thoughtful and Thyagarajan like this.
    Loading...

  2. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    12,503
    Likes Received:
    30,273
    Trophy Points:
    540
    Gender:
    Female
    I would go for the women's day events. I think it's fine if for a birthday only a few are invited. It just means in a big group there are some closer to each other. It is not possible that all are invited to each event.

    Recently, my old not-so-close friend invited many of us to her daughter's wedding but I was not invited to her son's wedding which happened few months later. I felt bit bad but it was fine...she was limited in guest count as the bride's side paid for reception and my friend had to prune her guest list.
     
    paru123, Thoughtful and Thyagarajan like this.
  3. Mistt

    Mistt IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    2,491
    Likes Received:
    7,089
    Trophy Points:
    435
    Gender:
    Female
    @paru123
    I didn't feel anything wrong with those ladies. They organized cultural programmes and invited to you and all other your community ladies because those were social event. Someone's birthday party is completely their personal and they can invites any person whom they want to. It is like we can be friendly with all but we feel a few are our dearest ones. So, please don't take it to heart.
    Yes, I would join in that woman's day party and picnic as they are community social events.
     
    paru123 and MalStrom like this.
  4. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    11,721
    Likes Received:
    12,543
    Trophy Points:
    615
    Gender:
    Male
    A lady of our family friend was invited but on the printed invitation under nota bene it was written in sketch pencil: this is only for information and remember you had not invited our family for your daughter’s wedding.
     
    paru123 likes this.
  5. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    4,201
    Likes Received:
    7,021
    Trophy Points:
    408
    Gender:
    Female
    I agree with @Mistt. It is easy to invite for large events especially when you don’t have to personally host in your home. But you should realize that these are mostly superficial interactions. For birthdays people will tend to call only their closer friends.
    If you want to feel more connected you can start with a few ladies that you gel with more than the others and try to get to know them better one-on-one, like over coffee or lunch. Then your circle will slowly expand.
     
    Mistt, paru123 and Thyagarajan like this.
  6. Thoughtful

    Thoughtful Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    643
    Likes Received:
    688
    Trophy Points:
    190
    Gender:
    Male
    Curious to know what the daughter thinks about this
     
  7. paru123

    paru123 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    427
    Likes Received:
    393
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Actually many ladies of the society turn up only on the main day of the program. Many have reasons like job, children, in laws, house work for not joining in the practise sessions that would start from 5 to 10 days before the event. So the ones who are the masterminds in organising , exclude them from all future activities which may or may not be linked to the society. One time refused means always a no is their thinking. They dont bother to call those ladies again for any other fun activity. This attitude of theirs make me think whether i should join them or not.
     
  8. paru123

    paru123 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    427
    Likes Received:
    393
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Yes agree its the same.
     
  9. paru123

    paru123 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    427
    Likes Received:
    393
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Whose daughter
     
  10. Thoughtful

    Thoughtful Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    643
    Likes Received:
    688
    Trophy Points:
    190
    Gender:
    Male
    yours
     

Share This Page