Just for FUN A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free. --Anonymous ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---- Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not the only thing in life!! --Anonymous ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --- Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others. --Oscar Wilde ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---- Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. --Scottish Proverb ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---- I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. --Sam Kinison ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---- Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too. --H. L. Mencken ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --- Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later;for another thing, they die earlier. --H. L. Mencken ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---- - "A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle." - U2 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---- - Marriage is a three-ring circus: --engagement ring ---wedding ring ---suffering ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --- When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why. When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why. ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --- Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener. ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---- When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife. ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --- I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back to home always. --Anonymous ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---- I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary? " She said,"Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?" --Anonymous ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- - My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours. That was only for the estimate. --Anonymous ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- - She got a mudpack and looked great for two days.Then the mud fell off. --Anonymous ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --- She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in." --Anonymous ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --- Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses to get to married. He says "the wedding rings look like minature handcuffs... .." --Anonymous ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --- If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife yelling at the frontdoor, who do you let in first? The Dog of course...at least he'll shut up after u let him in! --Anonymous ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --- A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly parted mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, 'Why did u have to die? Why did you have to die?" The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain in is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so? Deeply? A child? A parent?"The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied "My wife's first husband." ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---- A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled " It really works ! " ************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ******** "It is difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow" - Robert H. Goddard
