Is my Mom supportive & caring?

Why would you need someone to "take care" of you? Pregnancy is not a sickness and you can live a normal life. Your mother seems to have other commitments (like aging parents) so it is understandable she prioritize those that are in a real need. Maybe she also think of the situation from your DH:s perspective. How tough it would be on him having your mother there all the time.

 

I think you are being emotional & selfish . Your Mom is practical. As crayoness rightly mentioned, pregnancy is not a sickness. Btwn, why do you expect your Mom to come and stay with you. If you want to stay with your Mom, why can't you go and stay with her during your pregnancy for the same moral support and help.

Your husband should provide you moral support and help. What kind of help you are expecting from your Mom ? Cooking , cleaning and taking care of your family ? C'mon you are married.It is your family and you should find means to take care of it.

It is totally valid that she doesn't want to leave her aged Mom or her students doing tuition with her and come and stay with you. She is a very very good Mom and a teacher. You should appreciate her. It is not fair to expect your Mom to compromise and live with you, when you yourself can't do it.

As a Mom, it is her duty to tell her married daughter to tell certain things that her elders must have told when she got married. That doesn't mean she should listen to whatever you tell. She has already told what she would do as any Mom would do.. Expecting her to stay with you throughout your pregnancy and after delivery..(2 yrs !!!) is too much and sounds selfish to me.

 

Hi @Lonelyflower,

Congrats and have a healthy pregnancy. As @CrayoNess has said Pregnancy is not a sickness. You can have a normal life.Probably you are emotional due to your harmons.
Having your mother for a longer period with you will affect you as well as her life.If you feel that you need to stay with your mother why don't go to your parents place stay there in week ends or for some days.

Just because she is not willing to come and stay with you for longer period does not mean that she does not love you or care for you.It is just that she is having more pressing commitments and practical difficulty.That's all.

Enjoy your pregnancy and start reading books about pregnancy and get prepared for a bundle of joy.

 

Agree with Crayoness. Since your mom has many commitments, you need to be a little understanding. I had a terrible morning sickness which lasted till my second trimester and I didn't have anyone with me. I was working and travelling almost 90 km(two way) from home. It was horrible experience but I had no one for support. It never crossed my mind to ask my mom for help. I must be the thinnest pregnant mom ever because of the constant vomiting and lack of appetite.

I understand that when we get pregnant, we yearn for our mothers love and especially her cooking . But I know I had no choice as mom was living far away and she wouldn't leave her comfort zone for anything.

Maybe you can ask her to come visit you or you can take day off from work and spend some quality time together. That way you wont feel alone and it saves your mom the guilt too.

Have a happy pregnancy dear...enjoy it with your hubby. Take care

 

You are a very good girl too . Accepting one's mistake is a very big act.
You don't have to feel ashamed. Your question is valid from your point of view.
Happy to know that you are not adamant on your Point of View and have better clarity now.

Enjoy your pregnancy. You will be a good parent. All the best. !

 

THIS IS THE REASON WHY I LOVE...LOVE...LOVE INDUSLADIES.
Enjoy your pregnancy Lonelyflower12

 

Noting to be ashamed of dear. Most of us here are mommies and we perfectly understand how the hormone works during pregnancy. You needed your mom during your pregnancy, that's all. No need to apologise for that ok. Now go and enjoy your pregnancy.....your bundle of joy would be here soon...so cherish your pregnant moments with your family.

You are most welcome to post any questions or share your problems here.

 

Hey girl ! you are quite lucky to have a mom who is closely available to send you all your favorite goodies twice a week.Three forth of the ladies in this forum were not as lucky as you.Be happy with all the blessings you have and dont yearn for whats not practically viable.Privacy for you with your DH and local help on days you need that extra hand is a huge blessing.How could your brother all of a sudden start looking for your grandma? How would your grandma feel being passed on as a liability?

Congrats pa for your pregnancy and to the world of motherhood