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Influence of parents conduct on Children

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous in Parenting' started by Viswamitra, Aug 18, 2012.

  1. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Periamma,

    Thank you for your comments. You are right about the parenting skills of younger generation. I see their parenting class apart when compared to parenting skills I had when my son was growing up. We have a lot of lessons to learn from the present generation and it is a topic by itself.

    Viswa
     
    sindmani likes this.
  2. shambavi2000

    shambavi2000 Silver IL'ite

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    Thanksji! that was just what the doctor ordered at the end of yet another 'trying to be supermom' week! each day comes with new challenges, new lessons and new joys in parenting.Thanks once again for the wishes-works like tonic, I must say.:):):)
     
  3. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Kylie,

    What an excellent idea about giving fixed amount each time to teach them to spend within the budget. The temptation is too difficult to overcome even for adults and I don't blame the children facing that. I agree with you that children also learn out of their experience of interacting with their teachers and friends. The way they choose their friends also makes a big difference in their lives.

    I have heard different views about giving money as incentive for achieving academic performance. Your clear statement on this gives me direction now that there is nothing wrong as long as it is given in a measured way.

    Thank you for your enlightening response.

    Viswa
     
  4. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Kamalji,

    Thank you for reading this post and for your wonderful response. Cell phone is a wonderful example of what we should not be doing as a parent. I never thought of it and thank you for giving a practical example adding value to this post. Thank you.

    Viswa
     
  5. vjbunny

    vjbunny IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Viswa Sir
    A very good thread worth discussing and all the views in this thread are very thought provoking...
     
  6. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear VJ,

    Thank you for your kind words.

    Viswa
     
  7. Aspire

    Aspire Gold IL'ite

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    Very nice article Sir.

    However, reading this article, my mind wandered to the story of Prahalad and his parents Hiranyakashipu & Kayadu.

    Even though Hiranyakashipu was putra of the great Kashyapa Maharshi, but he did not set out to be an example of a good parent, but his son Prahalad becomes a great devotee of Lord Vishnu and grew up to be a lovely boy. Life does throw its surprises now and then, eh! :)

    I think raising kids confronts us with our own childhood on a very deep level. I still need to experience it and look forward to the challenge as a soon-to-be-would-be father :)

    I am sure there is going to be plenty of learnings for me as parent and look forward to it with a positive mindset and hoping will develop the qualities over the years.
     
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  8. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Aspire,

    You brought up a very good point about the children shining very well in their character when parents did not do as well as the children. You have quoted the most important lesson of Hiranyakashipu and Prahalad as example.

    Prahalad was a realized soul with a right to be born at will in any family unlike normal being who has no option but to incarnate to face the consequences of their actions. Prahalad decided to come into existence as a son of Hiranyakashipu to complete the mission of an Avatar. We need to also look at Hiranyakashipu's life before the spell of feeling most powerful person in the world through a boon. He spent a lot of time worshiping the Lord to even get that boon. He was a very learned person prior to his feeling the best in the world. This is a lesson that even if someone is an expert in Vedas an Shastras, he could go into the spell if he does not control his ego. Interestingly, even Ravana's life is considered flawless until he decided to take away mother Sita from Rama. He was a great devotee and would do anything to keep the people of Sri Lanka happy.

    I would take all of the above as lessons for raising children. We as a human being is a mix of outstanding character (good qualities) as well as not so good qualities. We have to demonstrate our struggle to kill those bad qualities everyday teaching the lesson why those need to go away. We also need to demonstrate our good qualities so that the children can inculcate those from us. The children have their own agenda and the Lord matches their requirement and send them to a family based on their prior karma. It is our duty to help them to release them out of the consequences of their actions to the extent possible besides working on our own consequences.

    I am sure you will have a wonderful parenthood with your wife and with your everlasting keenness to know, the child will be a bright and shinning star. God bless you.

    When you get a chance kindly read a blog written by me called Dependent & Decisive Children - Blogs - IndusLadies. This might be helpful to raise children to make their own decisions and driving them with questions to make the right decisions. When they learn to make good decisions, they will be very successful. Moreover, they definitely own their decisions better than ours.

    Viswa
     
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  9. vjbunny

    vjbunny IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Viswamitra Sir...
    That is a beautiful explaination you have given...

    Dear Aspire
    I think parenting involves both mother and father ... So I opine that his mothers lifestyle influenced him.... So depending on childs inherent qualities either parent can influence the children again with Ravans son Mandodari couldnt influence her children this makes me think it must be inherent quality what parents can do is to set an example with their conduct so that they can hope to raise them to be a responsible citizens...

    As for you I am sure you will be a wonderful parent having read your posts your threads I am very confident you will be... God Bless You
     
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  10. BHAVNAM6

    BHAVNAM6 Platinum IL'ite

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    Hello Viswa,

    This is a very delicate issue for parents obviously.I believe as parents we stop thinking about our priorities the moment a child is born.This time period never ends throughout our life.However parents need to be on the same page in terms of the disciplinary rules. Often times father makes liberal approach toward discipline and children loves to get the advantage of this situation.

    Bhavna
     
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