Impossible mil for kitchen :( :( absolutely fed up

What is the need to compete with her in kitchen for six months ,let her make what she ,fil wants to eat . You cook for yourselves.,let your Husband decide what to eat.

As it is you have a cook so I guess you are ok not cooking , so why get into competition mode for six months. I would say engage yourself in some other activity which gives you pleasure and let her rule the kitchen. I don't understand this kitchen makes queen thing. She wants to slog in the kitchen , let her do it.

Regarding your husbands health , let your husband handle it. He is not a child.

 

If u like cooking cook for yourself and anyone who wants to eat what you cook. If you don't let the cook make it.. Don't bother about what your mil does.. Let your husband handle her. Just inform him how much food gets wasted daily.

 

Armummy said it.
You have a cook. Have the cook prepare food for you and your husband, according to your taste. Let your MIL do what she wants. Don't even ask her anything related to the kitchen. She feeds off the attention she is getting. Try making it a non-issue and see what the reaction is.
Use the time you are not cooking to do something for yourself. Either go out or shut the door to your room. It is one thing if you are forced to cook and have to listen to her nagging, but this sounds like a win-win for you.
Your husband is an adult and capable of making his own food choices. Try to offer him healthy foods, but if he wants to eat what he likes don't make a big deal of it.

 

Wow if i had a cook and mil in kitchen ... i would just relax....and order items

 

lady - 6 months of freedome from the kitchen and cooking!!! What more do you need Just relax and enjoy. Add in some comments in between too saying "Oh idlis are nice. You are an awesome cook". MILs have this common tendency of not being able to digest the happiness of their DILs. So in a week, let me assure you, she will stop cooking because she sees that you are happy

 

Hey dont find fault with her,enjoy her cooking to the fill.Dont complain to your Dh.Let son and mom decide the course of action.If your DH objects ,say innocently that you dont want to argue or create diffrences bet mom and son.You could even ask your maid to enjoy a paid holiday or request her to cook something for yourself alone.Enjoy the freedom as you dont need to plan for 4 only for one.Make sure not to get irritated or angry and learn to keep your mind peaceful.Avoid clashes to decide the superiority of who reins the house and its members(as your MIL thinks).Take the fun off her clashes by being peaceful.When she finds not worthy to fight she may let things go a little.You could even order and make extra work for her.

 

Well said!

@ OP Shouldn't your H take care of his health and avoid food that is bad for him? Why should you go fighting with MIL and ruin your peace of mind?
Had I been in your situation, I would have frightened H to the core with all scientific facts reg oily, spicy food and how irresponsible he is for his age that he himself avoids it instead of complaining about MIL to him.

 

:exactly:what i do when my MIL is around......Which also did not go down well with her...coz the goal is the create problems for DIL!!

As i can not eat too spicy food, so she started making food ultra spicy(with loads of red chilli powder) and also instructed the cook to do the same, so that i end up complaining. I never complained, i ate whatever i felt like eating else i made something nice just for myself(or whoever liked to have it) or i would take what i like from office cafe. Finally her DS and her DH only started complaining to her that the food is too spicy to eat, to which she started blaming the cook, saying that she told the cook that, "your bhabi(meaning me) can not eat spicy food, so do not use too much red chilli....", to which i calmly, told in front of everyone(my H and my FIL) that "mummy today morning, i saw, you only were adding extra red chilli to the curry, after the cook was done, not that i am complaining, its actually yummy!!" That was all, she stops playing her "red-Chilli" tactics, at least from then on.

 

This is such an interesting thread.....laugh1smiley. No offences here but really these MILs love to slog in the kitchen and be the queen there. I am in an intercaste marriage. Though I have learnt all their cooking....and i donno what doubt my MIL has she ddoesn't let me do anything in the Kitchen when she is around. I too chill lliberally with no head ache of cooking. Even if i ask if something needs to be done she will say no not required.
I am working so I have a cook....my MIL simply desists food cooked by Maids....typical mentality. The curry she made 3 days back is edible but the curry made by maid become old in 1 day and must be thrown if the maid has cooked after the heaven fell down. MILs life is making food....and finishing it. I see the behavior and feel strange but dont bother about it. Sometime DH becomes fedup of the food and takes us out. Yes I have to compromise with the food but its ok I dont make much of the issue.
So just dont be fed up....really cool suggestions have come up....cant do much with these mentalities.