how to deal with lazy husband

Hai.

In India, mothers never allow their son to do any household work. But now it is changing but in a slow manner.

You can discuss with your hubby that you expect his share of work also and explain him working together in house will be a pleasure for both.

You can involve him in petty things and slowly he will also enjoy working with u.

All the best.


andal

 

Dear Ashwini,

Lazziness is one thing that is blended in the gene of every male.You cannot make him realize or do anything out of this behaviour.when some men see their wife struggling to manage everything they tend to come infront and help her.Some people remain silent at that time too.

My sincere advice to you is not to spend your brain in thinking about this.

Slowly men will change.Lets all hope for that!

 

Ashwini.. when did u get married? if it was quite recent, both of you need a little more time to get adjusted to each other.. esp for him to understand that u need a helping hand. do you work too and do you have kid(s)? if answer to any of the above 2 questions is yes, you have every right to start demanding his active participation in the house work right from now... but dont get into fights on this aspect.. that would only aggrevate him further. He might hv already realized his laziness.. your constant twinge on this matter would only worsen his nature further. so go slow by giving him small chores initially, and generously appreciate him on what he does (how ever small it is.. just like u wud do to a little child). there cud be aspects that he cannot tolerate.. ex., he might not like a dirty stove, might not like an uncleaned fridge or unfolded laundry.. if that is the case, just just leave it like that even if u cannot bear that urself. just do it for couple of times and blame ur hand pain or back pain for leaving it like that. if that is something he cannot tolerate he will start doing it.

His family is to be blamed for this nature.. their heart wud bleed if they know their kid is doing lot of work at home. but they shd slowly realize.. no choice !

 

Ashwini, what was your husband doing before marriage...how did he manage the house. I see that you are in US, hence he must be used to doing house work. Or is it that you shifted to US after marriage.

Initially, start with insisting on him giving you company when you are working in the kitchen and try to move him away from the tv. Tell him if he gives you company you will be able to finish work faster and also you both will get some quality time to catch up on the day to day things.

Then you can slowly start involving him in small jobs of putting thoings in place or laying the table or have him carry the cooked food to the dining etc. etc.

Also on one of those days during the month say that you are having pain or something and don't get out of the bed...see what he does.

 

i have been having this problem for the last 25 years. He is not only lazy, but also egoistic.Otherwise he is a nice man. He thinks he knows everything. he is very bookish and has a standing in society. he is so irritable and thinks no end of himself. never ever respects me and he is least bit sensitive, Some times I feel from the comment he makes about my sister and his female colleagues that he has no respect for women. He treats his sister also badly and does not have too many good words about his dead mother. Only woman he talks high is his grandmother. I do not know how to taclle him